Barbearic Crab War
|This tale has been told! It's done!|
|The Barbearic Crab War|
|Part of The Crab Wars|
The first battle in the war.
|Barbearic Robot Army||Bar Crab Army|
|Emperor Coldless, General Bot445, Lane Ants, General Bot1||Mr.Blue, Dare23, Ish2, Sockhopper|
|Robot army is high in numbers, and powerful.||Many crabs, and some Deletion Missiles.|
|Some robots are dumb, and easy to beat.||Crabs can't hold large weapons, so smaller ones are used.|
- 1 Prologue
- 2 Chapter 1 War Breaks Out
- 3 Chapter 2 Making The Plans
- 4 Chapter 3 The Night Battle
- 5 Chapter 4 Face To Claw Meeting
- 6 Chapter 5 Escape and Death
- 7 Chapter 6 Topia Attacked
- 8 Chapter 7 Three Months Later
- 9 Chapter 8 Freed
- 10 Chapter 9 Alexander Leaves
- 11 Chapter 10 The Final Blow
- 12 Epilogue
- 13 See Also
In 2011 Emperor Coldless turned 61 years old, on October 12. He knew there must be a successor to take his place. But he had made mayors, and governors illegal. He was the only in control of the entire country. So, he decided to look towards the parties for a successor. Many penguins wanted to, but many were too old. Coldless had looked for a successor for 3 weeks, until a messenger knocked on his office's door one day.
Coldless- "Who is it?"
Lane Ants- "It's-a me, sir, Lane Ants-a."
Coldless- "Lane, I haven't heard from you in years! Come on in."
Lane walked into the office. He was lime green, wore a viking helmet, and spoke with an Italian ascent.
Lane- "A, sir, we-a possibly found-a a successor to your-a position in the-a government."
Coldless- "We'll who is it?"
Coldless angrily looked at Lane. While getting up from his desk he rolled his eyes, and waddled towards Lane.
Coldless- "Lane, this is nothing to joke about. You can't be emperor of this country!"
Lane- "Yes-a I can. I am-a a good leader, I come-a from a long-a history of country leaders-a. I'm-a a naturally hatched leader."
Coldless- "I'm sure you have come from a long line of country leaders."
Coldless waddled back to his desk and sat down.
Lane- "Please-a! I'm-a begging you, I'd-a make a great leader."
Coldless- "Well, I am going on a vacation soon. Maybe.."
Lane- "Maybe want-a?"
Coldless- "..you could run the country for the week, while I'm gone?"
Lane- "Yes! I will-a not fail-a you, you can trust-a me."
Lane ran over to hug Coldless. Pushing Lane off with his flippers, Coldless grumbled.
Coldless- "I said 'maybe'."
Lane's 5in tall smile died down.
Lane- "Okay, sir, I will-a see you later."
Coldless- "I'll contact you when I have made my final decision, Lane!"
Lane- "Okay-a, sir."
The next day Lane's phone rang.
Coldless- "Lane, it's Coldless."
Lane- "Oh-a, Coldless. Do you-a have my answer?"
Coldless- "I'll give you a chance to control the Barbearer Islands for a week."
Lane- "For-a real?!"
Coldless- "Yes, 'For-a real'! I'm going on vacation to Yow in 3 days."
Lane smiled and started to dance around.
Coldless- "You aren't dancing again, are you?"
Lane suddenly stopped dancing.
Lane- "No. Why do-a you think I'd-a being doing that-a?"
Coldless- "Come by Fort Mchappy, my office, tomorrow at 5:00pm PST. We'll have dinner."
Lane- "I'll-a be there sir."
Coldless said goodbye and hung up the phone. Lane smiled and started to dance around again.
Three days later while Emperor Coldless was sitting in his beach at Linox sun tanning his cell phone rang. Coldless reached over and picked up his phone.
Coldless- "Coldless here, who's this?"
Lane- "Coldless, it's-a me! Listen I-a have some bad news-a."
Coldless- "You sound worry, what it is?"
Lane- "The crabs-a, they have-a declared war on-a us! Their-a attacking Billings as I-a speak!"
Coldless dropped his cell phone and rushed towards his limo.
The Barbearic Crab War had begun.
Chapter 1 War Breaks Out
Coldless hurried onto his private jet, The Speed. He got into a seat and buckled up.
Coldless- "Pilot, head back to the Barbearer Islands now! There is some serious trouble I must attend to."
Pilot- "Yes, sir. I'll contact the control tower."
Coldless- "No time!"
Pilot- "What do you mean, 'no time'? I have to call the control tower before launch."
Coldless- "We're at war, man! No time to chat with the control tower."
Pilot- "I could get arrested for that."
Coldless- "Just take off."
Pilot- "Fine, sir."
The plane's engines turned on and the plane started to move out. A cackle came over the radio in the cockpit of the plane.
Control Tower- "Flight 573, move back to the airport. You are not clear for launch."
Pilot- "This is an emergency. We must take off now."
Control Tower- "You are not clear for launch. Move back to the airport, immediately!"
The pilot ignored the control tower, and increased engine speed. The plane started to move quicker as it went down the runway.
Control Tower- "Turn back now Flight 573, you are not clear for launch! Flight 58 is landing on you runway!"
The plane's landing gear closed into the plane, and the plane rose up. Suddenly the pilot saw Flight 58 flying right towards them. The pilot veered the plane to the right, which surprisingly was the same way Flight 58 turned.
Pilot- "Make sure your seat belts are buckled, and your tray tables stowed. It's going to get bumpy!"
The pilot quickly turned the pilot tighter to the right, avoiding the other plane. The pilot turned the plane so far right it started to go down. The pilot saw this instantly and pushed down on the controls, sending the plane up. The plane barely missed the ground, but skinned across the tops on trees.
Pilot- "ARGH!(gasp*) That was too close for comfort."
Coldless- "Holy(gasp*) Rhopper Berries! That was freaky."
The robot guards looked at Coldless.
Robot Guard 1- "Sir, are you okay?"
Coldless- "Yes, I'm fine. Just had a little heart stopping."
Coldless panted for awhile then stopped. He looked out his window and saw the ocean rushing by.
Coldless- "I wonder what I'll see when we get there?"
While Emperor Coldless was flying to the Barbearer Islands, a serious battle was going on. The crabs had attacked the town of Billings, and the robots were having trouble holding them off. The crabs had used some Deletion Missiles to get rid of some of the bots. The crabs were hiding behind a hill, which the robots were based on the other side.
Crab Scout- "Mr.Blue, the robots are coming up the hill! And it looks like they've brought reinforcements."
Mr.Blue- "Not good, they wiped out most of our crabs. We only have 50 left..."
Crab Scout- "We may need to escape."
Mr.Blue- "How dare you mention that! Crabs never back down from a fight."
At that time Dare23 came back from the missile launcher.
Dare23- "I got 10 more units coming. I'm sure we could fight off the robots."
Mr.Blue- "I'm not sure about that. We'll have to surprise attack for sure."
Dare23- "Hmm. Wait, I have an idea."
Coldless' jet landed at Topia, and waiting at the airport was Lane. He hurried inside the airport, which was full of penguins. Lane stood by a pillar, guarded by 2 robots.
Lane- "Coldless, this-a bad! The crabs of-a Bar Crab City have-a attacked the town-a Billings!"
Coldless- "Why are they suddenly turning on us?"
Lane- "I have-a gotten reports on-a why. You may-a find it interesting."
Coldless- "Lay it on me."
Lane- "It-a started a couple hours ago when a crab was swimming by an underground pool, the crab-a tapped the glass and-a accidentally broke it. The pool-a flooded, and a penguin got-a angry. So he-a attacked the crab, and ate it-a. Mr.Blue heard-a about this and thought-a all Barbearics were turning on-a them, so he and the crab-a army attacked Billings-a."
Coldless- "What!? That's a crazy reason to beat up a crab, and to go to war with us because of a theory!"
Lane- "I know-a! I tried-a reason with the-a crabs, they would not-a listen."
Coldless- "Well I'm not going to war, I'm going to make peace with the crabs."
The penguins waddled outside the airport and got into a limo. They drove off to Fort Mchappy to make further plans.
Chapter 2 Making The Plans
The limo pulled up to Fort Mchappy 18 minutes later. Coldless and Lane were met by 5 robot guards.
Guard 1- "Sir, the Bar Crab forces have advance on our forces. They have taken most of the land from us."
Coldless- "How is that possible?"
Guard 1- "They have been using delete missiles on our forces."
Lane- "Mama Mia! This is not-a good."
Coldless- "Get me General Bot445, now soldier!"
Guard 1- "Yes, sir."
The bot flew to the fort, as Lane and Coldless waddled behind. The 2 penguins waddled into the fort and right into a board room, then they sat down. General Bot445 flew in a minute later.
General Bot445- "Greetings, sir. We have had some trouble fighting off the Bar Crab Forces."
Coldless- "Yes, I've heard. But I need for information."
General Bot445- "Well the enemy forces have slowly pushed us back towards the sea. This caused the citizens to be pushed behind the enemy."
Coldless- "What!? That means we can't use any delete missiles against them."
General Bot445- "I have calculated the situation, and have developed a plan."
Coldless- "Lay it on me."
The Bar Crab army was being brought down by the Barbearic robots, and needing to fight them off. The generals were in a huddle over a holographic map.
Dare23- "So when the robots come over the hill, we'll sneak around the bottom of the hill. The robots will come over to not see us, allowing us to attack them from behind."
Mr.Blue- "Of all my military past, that has got to be the best idea I have ever heard."
Dare23- "Thanks, sir."
At that time Ish2 came crawling in. He had a small cut on him, and was carrying a lazer gun.
Ish2- "I'm here, sir. Their coming over the hill, what's your plan?"
Dare23- "We're sneaking around the hill, and behind them. Then we attack them!"
Ish2- "That sounds like a good idea."
Mr.Blue- "Let's move crabs, move!"
Ish2- "Yes, sir!"
The crab army started to move around the hill, but they were too late. The Barbearic robots came over the hill and attacked them.
Ish2- "Crabs, fire for their heads!"
Mr.Blue- "Back to positions!"
The robots started to blast the crabs, knocking out 5 a shot.
Mr.Blue- "Their lazers are to large! Every shot take out 5 of our troops."
After 5 shots, Dare23 spoke into a walkie talkie.
Dare23- "Delete launchers, we need a missile right now!"
Launcher- "We're trying hard over here. But the wire snapped, we can't load missiles right now!"
Dare23- "Well get it done soon!"
Dare23 hung up on the walki talkie and begin shooting again. A robot spotted him and came after him.
Robot- "Die, crab rebel."
Dare23- "I don't think so!"
Dare23 suddenly jumped up onto the robot and ripped the head off, then got inside. He messed with a few wires and started to control the robot.
Dare23- "Whoa, I can't believe it worked!"
Ish2- "Dare23, quit fooling around. We need all the help we could get!"
Dare23- "I'm not fooling around. I hot-wired this robot, I can control it now."
Ish2- "Good idea, now get out there and fight!"
The robot body flew up the hill and started to blast the other bots. The robot body shot down one enemy with each blast.
Ish2- "Looks like your idea worked."
Dare23- "Enough chat, we're at war!"
Coldless and Lane waddled towards a fighter jet that Coldless had bought from Feey1. It is quite large, and was a light blue color.
Lane- "Are we going-a be flying in-a this?"
Coldless- "That army needs all the help they could get. It's about time I can get out my fighter jet."
Lane- "It is-a dusty."
Coldless- "I haven't messed around with it for awhile."
General Bot445- "Sir, I am sending 50 robots to reinforce them."
Coldless got into the cockpit and flipped some switches.
Coldless- "Make it 500, including you."
General Bot445- "Yes, sir."
The cockpit closed with Coldless in it. He flipped a couple more switches and the fighter jet started up. He put on a pilot helmet, and pushed a few buttons.
Coldless- "Lane, you good at shooting?"
Lane- "Good? I was-a trained to shoot-a."
Coldess- "Good, because I need to shoot any enemies."
The jet started to move down the runway, picking up speed. The plane took off, and the landing gear came up.
Lane- "Is this-a the only fighter jet-a in your-a military?"
Coldless- "Yes, I keep hitting budget problems when I try to make an air force."
The plane turned to the left and headed to Billings, where the war was happening.
Mr.Blue rushed across the ground towards Ish2. Several bots almost hit him, leaving a bunch of blast marks behind him.
Mr.Blue- "We can't take them! The robots have called in reinforcements, and their running us down!"
Ish2- "We can't fight in the open either! We need some sort of protection."
Mr.Blue- "Are those delete missiles ready for launch yet?"
Ish2- "No, sir."
Quickly Dare23 came running in. He was panting and held a lazer gun in his claw.
Mr.Blue- "What is it commander? You have to command the left flank."
Dare23- "There is no left flank. The robots took it down."
Mr.Blue yelled into a walkie talkie.
Mr.Blue- "The robots have taken the left flank! Delete missiles are in danger, and citizens can be freed."
Mr.Blue put down the walkie talkie and grabbed 2 lazer guns. He passed one to Ish2, who was confused.
Ish2- "What is it, sir?"
Mr.Blue- "You're coming with me. We need to destroy the robot command, then all the robots will stop."
Ish2- "Sir, that's for War Bots. These are designed differently."
Mr.Blue- "Well I'm sure we can take out something important over there."
Dare23 picked up a bazooka and fired at 5 robots.
Dare23- "I guess I'll stay here and command the others, sir?"
Mr.Blue- "Yes. come on Ish2, let's go!"
The two crabs ran around the hill, and disappeared.
Chapter 3 The Night Battle
Coldless looked out the cockpit window and saw the battle.
Coldless- "This is chaotic!"
Lane- "I must-a agree."
Coldless- "Looks like the center flank of bots needs some help. I'm going down."
The fighter flew down and started to shoot. When the crabs saw this they started scurry around trying to escape.
Lane- "Ha ha! Look at them-a go!"
Coldless- "Watch your aim, we have a small amount of robots as it."
Lane- "Yes, sir!"
Lane started to shoot some more, aiming more towards the center flank of crabs.
Dare23 ran with his bazooka trying to blast the fighter jet, which just flew over him.
Dare23- "I have to take out that jet!"
He continued to follow the jet before it got too far ahead, and he got tired.
Dare23- "(pant*) I am not as fit as (pant*) I used to be!(pant*)"
Dare23 laid down, and rested. All of a sudden a robot grabbed him.
Robot- "You are under arrest, rebel crab."
Dare23- "Oh I don't think so!"
Dare23 freed his claw, turned on his Keysaber. He slashed the robot's arms off. Robot- "Stop, stop."
Dare23- "Too late!"
Dare23 deactivated his Keysaber, as he watched the robot collapsed. Sparks started to fly as the robot's vocal started to stutter.
Dare23- "That's what you get, creepy bot!"
Dare23 kicked the bot, then ran over to his bazooka. He picked it up and started to fire at Coldless' fighter jet.
Coldless' jet started to go down, it was on fire!
Coldess- "We're going down. Prepare to eject!"
Coldless pushed a button that ejected him and Lane out of the plane. The plane flew right into the ground wiping out most of the Bar Crab center flank. Coldless and Lane pulled a string on their back, and out popped a parachute.
Lane- "That was-a scary!"
Coldless- "I'll say. I'll call one of the bots to come and pick us up."
Coldess pulled a remote from his pocket. He pressed a few buttons and in no time a robot came and hurried them to the ground.
Robot- "Are you okay, sir?"
Coldless- "Yes, now return to the battlefield soldier!"
Robot- "Yes, sir."
The robot flew off as Coldless and Lane took the parachutes off their backs.
Lane- "Sir, we must-a return to the-a command center."
Coldless- "Good point, we better waddle off now."
The 2 waddled off as quick as they could. They ran through a meadow until they came upon a forest.
Coldless- "On the other side of this forest there should be the command center."
Lane- "Good-a, I am-a a tired."
WOOSHH!" Suddenly some brush left of the penguins moved.
Coldless- "What was that?"
Lane- "I don't-a know."
Coldless- "There is is again. Something is running circles around us!"
Coldless grabbed a Keysaber from his pocket, and Lane grabbed a lazer gun from his pocket. They went back-to-back and held up their weapons, looking around them. Suddenly Mr.Blue popped out of the woods.
Coldless- "Mr.Blue!? Oh, you're going down..."
Mr.Blue- "Bring it!"
Mr.Blue jumped onto Coldless' beak and pinched it.
Mr.Blue- "How do you like that?"
Lane punched Mr.Blue off of Coldless' beak and fired at him. A snowball hit Mr.Blue and he went silent for 30 seconds, this gave time for Lane to put handcuffs on him.
Mr.Blue- "Whuh? I've never been captured before!"
Lane- "Well you are-a now."
Mr.Blue- "Am I?"
Lane- "Yes-a! Sometime you are-a just dumb-a."
Mr.Blue- "Ish2, help, help!"
Lane covered Mr.Blue's mouth with his flipper. But it was too late, Ish2 popped out of nowhere and attacked.
Chapter 4 Face To Claw Meeting
Ish2 jumped out of the woods snapping his claws. He pinched Lane's beak first thing.
Lane tried tossing around to get the crab off, but nothing worked.
Lane- "Get off-a me!"
Ish2- "Never I have an iron grip."
Lane finally pushed Ish2 off his beak and grabbed his gun, when suddenly Mr.Blue awoke.
Coldless- "You get Ish2, I'll handle the old crab."
Mr.Blue- "Hey I heard that!"
Mr.Blue suddenly shot Coldless with a snowball gun, but missed. The snowball went flying right into Ish2's chest.
Mr.Blue- "Oh great!"
Coldless- "Got you."
Mr.Blue was suddenly grabbed by Coldless and Lane, completely immoveable.
Coldless- "Look who's laughing now."
Mr.Blue- "Ish2 is only knocked out for 30 seconds!"
Right after that phrase Ish2 woke up, and right away Coldless shot him with a lazer gun. Coldless grabbed Mr.Blue and pulled him up face to face.
Coldess- "Looks like we're having crab for dinner tonight."
Lane- "Hahaha. Yes we-a will!"
1:05am PST Coldless and Lane waddled into the Barbearic Command Center. It was placed in a settlement and many robots were flying around the place. There Coldless met General Bot1, who was currently making a plan over a holographic image.
General Bot1- "The crab left and center flanks have been taken. But the command is about ready to fire delete missiles towards our forces again."
Coldless- "This war should be over tonight."
Lane- "I disagree-a."
General Bot1- "Why, sir?"
Lane- "The crabs-a have not-a used all of-a their forces. There are-a still many left."
Coldless- "Good point. We may need to call General Bot445 to this meeting."
Coldless grabbed a remote from his pocket and pushed a few buttons. A door opened and General Bot445 came flying in.
General Bot445- "What is it, sir?"
Coldless- "The crab forces have been run down and destroyed, but their command center still stands."
General Bot445- "Calculating. Done. We should send topts behind the enemy, then send any available robots towards the enemy. We shall surround them."
Lane- "I-a like the idea-a."
Coldless- "Me, too. Alright general relay those commands to our forces."
General Bot445- "Yes, sir."
General Bot445 flew off, while Lane and Coldless walked to dinner table. When they got there the table had plates, cups full of Cream Soda, and Mr.Blue in a cage right in the middle.
Lane and Coldless sat down as 2 robots put bibs on them. Then the robots poured sauce on Mr.Blue.
Mr.Blue- "Hey, watch it!"
Coldless- "I've had a long day, and I'm quiet hungry."
Mr.Blue- "Don't even think you can eat me, Coldless!"
Coldless- "Oh I don't think I can eat you, but I bet ME and LANE can eat you."
Lane- "Wait-a, what about-a Ish2?"
Coldless- "Oh, yes. Chef, bring me Ish2."
Chef Bot- "Yes, sir."
The bot left and later came back with a cage covered in blanket. The robot pulled the blanket off and their sat Ish2.
Chef Bot- "Where would you like him, sir?"
Coldless- "Put him right next to Mr.Blue, but not close enough for them to touch each other."
Mr.Blue- "Ish2, I'm so glad you're here! Their going to eat me."
Ish2- "Don't worry, sir. I'm sure I'll get you out of here."
Mr.Blue- "Son, please just say dad."
Coldless- "Ooh, Mr.Blue is your father."
Ish2- "Sir, you're, you're my father?"
Mr.Blue- "Yes, son. I gave you up for adoption a long time ago. I followed your every move so I can watch over you, and see how you were doing."
Ish2- "So that's why you got me to join the military?"
Coldless- "Enough chat! It's time to eat!"
The chef bot opened the cage and grabbed Mr.Blue, then put him on a plate that had lettuce on it.
Mr.Blue- "Son, you're the president! You're the president of Bar Crab City!"
Suddenly the chef bot hit Mr.Blue with a hammer. His thick skin cracked and the meat was exposed.
Chef Bot- "Dinner is served."
Coldless- "All right."
The chef bot gave half of the crab to Coldless, and the other to Lane. Then gave them pepper and salt shakers.
Ish2- "How, how could you!?"
Coldless- "We penguins are further up the food chain then you."
Lane- "We will-a win this war-a."
The 2 penguins started to cackle and eat the crab right in front of Ish2's eyes.
Ish2 sat in the cold cage, angry. Emperor Coldless had just ate his father, and he wanted revenge. Ish2 sat there thinking who would win the war, what would happen during the war, and especially why Coldless had kept him alive. Ish2 felt sunlight on him as a door opened, and there stood Emperor Coldless.
Coldless- "Looks like you're mad about your dad being my dinner."
Ish2- "Oh you got that right! I will get revenge on you."
Coldless- "Too late, you're my breakfast."
Coldless grabbed the cage and waddled out the door with it.
Ish2- "You'll never defeat me, or the Bar Crab forces!"
Coldless- "Will I? My robots have forced them back into the waters."
Ish2- "You're bluffing!"
Coldless- "Am I?"
A robot came flying in and started to relay some information to Coldless.
Robot- "Sir, the crabs have escaped our grasp."
Coldless- "They're further underwater?"
Ish2- "Haha! You'll never win now!"
Coldless- "Pipe down, dumb crab!"
Robot- "General Bot445 would like to see you, sir."
Coldless- "I'll meet up with him right after breakfast."
Robot- "Okay, sir."
Chapter 5 Escape and Death
The first battle had ended when the crabs had to retreat to the ocean. The Barbearic topts have started to search for the crabs but have failed. Ish2 finally discovered his father, but sadly had to watch as he was eaten by Coldless. Now he sits in a cage waiting to become Coldless' breakfast.
Coldless- "A good morning to eat crab for breakfast. Wouldn't you agree, Lane?"
Coldless- "Chef, is the crab ready?"
Chef Bot- "Yes, sirrrrrrrrrrrr....."
Coldless- "What in the world?"
Coldless and Lane got up and waddled over to the kitchen. As they looked in Ish2 jumped out and started to run away.
Lane- "Soldiers, get-a that crab-a!"
Ish2- "You'll never take me alive."
Lane- "Fine-a. Bring him-a back dead!"
Ish2- "That's not what I meant!"
Coldless- "That's what it meant to Lane."
Five guards started to chase after Ish2, they we're picking up speed. When they were right above them they started to shoot.
Coldless- "Get him! Get him!"
Ish2 turned to his left and started to head towards the water. He jumped in right as a robot blasted towards him. The robots rushed over to the water and looked around. They turned back and headed to Coldless.
Robot- "He escaped, sir."
Coldless- "You dumb robots! You could have easily caught him. ARGH!"
Robot- "We will launch the submarines to search for him, sir."
Coldless- "That's a..."
Lane- "No-a, sir. We need-a them to find-a the crab army."
Coldless- "Oh, right. Well we know he'll go back to Bar Crab City, so, um, get me General Bot445!"
Robot- "Yes, sir."
Lane- "What about-a General Bot1?"
Coldless- "He's old. Not as smart as he used to be, General Bot445 is much more intelligent."
Lane- "So-a what is your-a plan, sir?"
Coldless- "We'll use a delete missile to wipe out the entire Bar Crab City."
Lane- "Good plan-a, sir."
Coldless- "I know right?"
Ish2 raced across the ocean floor. It was nice to be back in the water, but now he had to get to Bar Crab City. His father was just eaten, and told Ish2 that he was the new king. He was getting tired when he spot a familiar crab up ahead.
Ish2- "Dare23, is that you?"
Dare23- "Yes! Ish2, is that you?"
Dare23- "I though you and Mr.Blue were dead!"
Dare23 rushed over to Ish2. When Ish2 saw Dare23's condition he wished he hadn't. He was bruised, scratched, and had many bandages on.
Ish2- "Well, Mr.Blue is."
Dare23- "Is what?"
The 2 crabs went silent and didn't speak until another crab came running towards them. He came up by Dare23 and started to speak really fast.
Crab- "Sir, Sockhopper is on his way now."
Dare23- "Good. Go back to command and tell him not to give away the secret."
Ish2- "What secret?"
Dare23- "Sockhopper is coming to help us in battle, but the Barbearics can't know about him being on our side."
The 2 crabs walked away still sad about what happened to their great king.
Dare23- "We'll have a memorial today."
Thousands of crabs came to the memorial. Pictures of Mr.Blue were hung around rocks, and a giant casket sat in front of everyone. The casket was made of wood, and weighed down by chains. Dare23 put Mr.Blue's crab in the casket, Ish2 put in his trident, and other crabs put in pictures and art of Mr.Blue." When the casket was full they closed it, and a preacher stepped forward.
Preacher- "In remembrance of Mr.Blue, our beloved king. He gave his life for our own, in the midst of battle."
Ish2 started to cry. Dare23 handed him a tissue, which was really no use underwater. Ish2 just threw the tissue over his shoulder.
Preacher- "He was very wise, kind, and was a giver. He was the greatest king this country has ever seen, it is true. If anyone would like to say a few words about Mr.Blue, come on up."
Ish2 walked up to the podium.
Ish2- "Mr.Blue was a great father, king, crab, and so much more. I can't describe him in one word, but 'Good'. I saw him die the other night, it tore me apart. I, you, and all will remember him."
Ish2 walked away from the podium, as the preacher cut the chains holding the casket. The casket floated to the surface and disappeared. All the crabs swam up to see it float away into the ocean. Ish2 started to cry.
Daer23- "Here's a tissue, my king."
Ish2- "You knew?"
Coldless waddled up to the delete missile launchers, that were preparing to fire. He touched the missile and cackled.
Coldless- "Those crabs will will definitely learn a lesson today! One they shall soon not forget."
Lane- "Yes-a. This will be-a terrific!"
Coldless- "Soldier, are we ready to fire?"
Robot- "Yes, sir. The missile is preparing to launch."
Lane and Coldless waddled away and plugged their ears. A robot hit a button and the missile launched into the air, towards space.
Robot- "The missile will go into space, then come back down onto Bar Crab City, sir."
Coldless- "Good work, soldier."
Lane- "Bye, bye-a crabs."
Coldless- "Tell all the soldiers to full back here. We'll regroup and then celebrate the destruction of Bar Crab City."
Robot- "I will alert General Bot1 immediately, sir."
The robot flew off, as Coldless and Lane started to cackle again.
Sockhopper was sailing on his boat when a Dare23 popped out of the water, and jumped onto his boat.
Sockhopper- "ARGH! What you be doing here, crab?"
Dare23- "Sockhopper, there's a delete missile headed towards Bar Crab City. We need to use your boat as a decoy!"
Sockhopper- "Fine with me."
Dare23- "Okay, got to this sector. I'll type the information onto your radar."
Dare23 clicked a few buttons and moved out of for Sockhopper. The he walked to the edge of the boat.
Dare23- "Once you get there jump off immediately! That missile well strike in 7 minutes."
Sockhopper- "Roger that!"
Dare23 jumped back into the water where he met Ish2 and some other soldiers.
Dare23- "Spread out, we need to alert everyone about the missile!"
Ish2- "Let's go!"
Dare23- "I'm going to alert everyone on where to go."
All the crabs swam out to alert the city as Dare23 started to shout that everyone should go South.
Dare23- "All crabs head South now! This is an emergency."
Thousands of crabs scurried across the ocean floor. The ocean floor was soon impossible to see. All you could see was red.
Dare23- "Keep coming, keep coming!"
On the other hand, Ish2 was swimming to door to door. He knocked on each one and told whatever crab that answered to swim South as fast they could.
Ish2- "Everyone swim South. Everyone swim South!"
Crab- "We're all going to die!"
Ish2- "Not if you get far enough South!"
Crab 2- "My baby!"
Crab- "It's the end of the world!"
Crab 2- "AAHHH!"
Ish2- "Calm down people! Focus your energy on escaping, not screaming your lungs out."
Above the water Sockhopper got to the sector. He walked out of the bridge and looked up at the sky, there he saw the missile!
Sockhopper- "That missile be heading right towards me! AAHHH!"
Sockhopper grabbed the most important stuff he needed, then dived into the water. He quickly swam down and started towards South. He saw thousands of crabs across the ocean floor, screaming and swimming. Sockhopper looked up and saw the missile hit his boat.
Chapter 6 Topia Attacked
The Delete Missile destroyed Sockhopper's ship, and some surrounding water and land. The crabs had started to swim due South when the missile struck, and none were lost. Sockhopper swam to the surface where he met Dare23.
Sockhopper- "ARGH. This be horrible."
Dare23- "Do you have a hand held GPS?"
Sockhopper- "You be thinking I don't? Of course me have one!"
Ish2 popped out the water.
Ish2- "We can't head South anymore. The ocean floor has dropped 400 feet down, we need to head East."
Dare23- "Topia? I don't think so, that has the most robots in the whole country!"
Ish2- "We have no choice."
Sockhopper- "How about Metrix?"
Ish2- "Can't, too many topts are sailing around it."
Dare23- "We can't go back, the robots will be all over Billings."
Sockhopper- "Then we be going to Topia."
Dare23- "What, are you crazy? We'll be completely wiped out."
Sockhopper- "We be having no other choice."
Ish2- "Yes, we have no other choice. And come on, trust me."
Dare23- "Fine! We'll started going there now."
Coldless looked over the railing and into the water. The topt was going full speed towards Bar Crab City, ready to check out what had happened. Coldless looked ahead and saw where the missile had struck. The beach was missing, and the water level had dropped 10ft. Lane waddled next to time and looked ahead too.
Coldless- "Have the radars picked up any signs of life?"
Lane- "No-a, sir. We believe-a they have been-a completely destroyed-a."
Coldless- "Get me General Bot445, I need to speak with him."
Lane- "Yes-a, sir."
Lane waddled off, and 2 minutes later General Bot445 came flying in.
General Bot445- "You wanted me, sir?"
Coldless- "Yes, I need you to send underwater drones to check Bar Crab City."
General Bot445- "Sir, they are still being designed. They are not done with the first prototype!"
Coldless- "I don't care. Contact them saying I only need one working one."
General Bot445- "Yes, sir. But.."
General Bot445 flew off and Coldless followed behind him. Coldless waddled onto the bridge and looked out the window. A truck on land drove up by the water. Two robots came out and untied a droid in the back. They activated the droid, and then commanded it to go into the water.
General Bot445- "Cameras are activated."
Coldless looked down at a monitor which showed what the robot was seeing.
General Bot445- "No sign of life, sir."
Coldless- "Then the war is over."
It was night time as the Bar Crab Army rose out the water and onto the beaches of Topia. Above them was a giant stone wall, blocking the beach from the city.
Sockhopper- "That be a big wall."
Dare23- "And we're blowing it up. Ish2, give all the bazookas to some of the soldiers."
Ish2- "Hey I don't take orders from you. I have a better idea: Dare23, give all the bazookas to some of the soldiers."
Dare23- "I just said that you dumbo."
Sockhopper- "Cool down you little steamy crabs. Butter is melting all over you."
Dare23 and Ish2 just madly looked at Sockhopper.
Dare23- "Everyone just get a bazooka before anyone notices we're here."
Ish2- "Yes, everyone just get a bazooka before anyone notices we're here."
Dare23- "Why do you keep copying me?"
Sockhopper- "Just quiet you crabby crabs!"
Ish2 and Dare23 went out and grabbed themselves a bazooka, then ordered everyone grab a bazooka them self. Everyone obeyed and grabbed a bazooka. Then all the bazooka using crabs lined up in front of the wall and fired.
The wall came crumbling down and Topia was exposed. Ish2 climb up onto the rumble and shouted as loud as he could.
Crab army- "YEAH!!!"
The crab army ran past the walls and onto the streets of Topia. The road went straight forward, left, and right, and crabs filled each road. They started to set fire to the buildings, and shooting vehicles with their bazooka. Penguins came waddling as fast as they could out of buildings. The crabs continued to charge to Fort Mchappy, where the government was housed.
Sockhopper- "This be a success, sir."
Ish2- "Yes, yes it is."
Dare23- "Let's go!"
Ish2- "Right behind you."
Dare23 and Ish2 headed towards the East road, as Sockhopper headed down the West road. Thousands of crabs roamed the streets burning down buildings, and blowing up vehicles. A bunch of crabs that went down the North road met some robots.
Crab 1- "I think not."
The crab pulled up a bazooka and blasted the robots to pieces. The crabs ran over what was left of the robots then headed back East, where the whole army was headed.
While the invasion was going Coldless and Lane were celebrating on Billings, thinking the war had ended. But when Coldless was about to dumb a bucket of Cream Soda on Lane General Bot1 came in.
General Bot1- "Sir, Topia is under attack by the rebels."
Coldless- "What!? That's impossible, they're all dead."
General Bot1- "I'm afraid not, sir. All the Bar Crab City citizens are attacking at once. Our forces have been pushed back to Fort Mchappy, as the crabs invade."
Lane- "We-a better go now-a."
Coldless- "Oh you think!?"
Lane and Coldless hurried onto a topt, with General Bot1 following behind them.
Coldless- "Contact all the topts in the islands, tell them to go to Topia right away!"
General Bot1- "Yes, sir."
Coldless- "Lane, I need you to supervise the bridge. I'll relay any information to you on channel 7.11 on my walkie talkie, okay?"
Lane- "Yes-a, sir! I will not-a let you-a down."
Coldless- "Good, I'm going to go do something."
Lane- "Un, okay."
The crab army had got in view of Fort Mchappy, where they met some robots. Dare23 pulled out his Keysaber, and when a bazooka was fired he started to slash the robots with his Keysaber.
Robot- "Stop, stop!"
The robots were run over, and run down by the crabs. The crabs easily beat the bots, with hardly any loss.
Ish2- "Man, at this rate we'll rule all of the Barbearer Islands!"
Dare23- "I'll say. Whoah, robot 2 o'clock!"
Ish2 shot a robot with his laser gun and and fired a couple shots at some other bots.
Dare23- "Mr.Blue trained you well, didn't he?"
The crabs came upon the gates to Fort Mchappy and immediately knocked it down. They were about to attack Fort Mchappy when out of nowhere 100's of robots started to shoot them. The crabs were in the open and totally exposed.
Ish2- "This isn't good!"
Dare23- "Run for you lives!"
Sockhopper- "No, stand your ground!"
Dare23 shot the robots with his bazooka. He about to shoot again when it didn't fired. Dare23 looked in it and realized he was out of bullets! He tapped Ish2 on the shoulder.
Dare23- "I'm out of ammunition!"
Ish2- "There's a cart back in the city with a bunch of ammunition, it's right in front of the gates."
Dare23- "Got it, sir."
Sockhopper- "While you be at it get me a new lazer battery, mine is running dry."
Dare23- "Got it, Sockhopper."
Dare23 ran out as he avoided blasts from the robots. When he made it into the city he found in much calmer there. He ran to his right and found the cart. He loaded up and headed back to into the courtyard when something caught his eye. He saw a large tank, fully armed. He dropped the ammunition and went straight to the tank.
Dare23- "Now this is what I'm talking about!"
He flipped a few switches and the tank started to moved. He drove into the courtyard where he met Ish2.
Ish2- "Holy Rhopper Berries, a tank?! How did you get that?"
Dare23- "I just found it outside the court yard idling."
Sockhopper- "That be huge. Fire at will!"
Dare23- "Don't mind if I do."
Ish2 got into the tank as Dare23 started to fire at the robots. Ish2 walked over to a machine gun and started to fire at the robots. Soon topts were seen on the sea, and the tops of them opened. Robots started to blast out of their transport shells and headed towards Fort Mchappy.
Ish2- "We can't do this, we have to retreat!"
Dare23- "Agreed! All crabs retreat!"
Sockhopper- "We be giving up?"
Ish2- "We need to retreat, we don't stand a chance. Spread the word!"
Sockhopper- "Retreat! Retreat, you little hard red creatures, retreat!"
The crabs ran out of the court yard and headed towards the ocean. Dare23 and Ish2 stayed in the tank as Sockhopper waddled into the tank.
Sockhopper- "I thought you said we needed to retreat?"
Ish2- "We're covering your escape. Go now, that's an order!"
Sockhopper- "Yes, sir."
Sockhopper waddled off as fast as he could as Dare23 and Ish2 started to fire at the robots. They distracted the robots from the army, and started to blast them to kingdom come.
Ish2- "We better go now."
Dare23- "Right behind you."
The two crabs ran out of the tank and down the street. Just as soon as they had left a robot fired at their tank blowing it up.
Dare23- "This is a true war!"
Ish2- "I'll say."
The crabs ran into the water where it was safe, and met up with the other crabs. The war had truly begun.
Chapter 7 Three Months Later
Three months after Topia was attacked Coldless had been crushing the crab army with dirty plans. He had destroyed half of the army in November and the crabs had to call reinforcements from other crab civilizations. Ish2 was finally crowned the official king, and was trying to find a new home for Bar Crab City.
Ish2 sat in a underwater cave planning what to do next when Dare23 walked in.
Dare23- "King, we may need help from penguins in this war."
Ish2- "What do you mean, Dare23?"
Ish2- "I don't know. This war has driven Coldless to the breaking point. He may begin war on Yow."
Dare23- "It's worth a shot!"
Ish2 sighed and looked down at his desk. He played with his claws a little bit then finally came up with an answer.
Ish2- "I'll call Alexander right now."
Ish2 swam out of the cave and into the crabs makeshift camp. He swam over to massive rock that stuck out of the water. He climbed up it and onto the top, which was out of the water. On the rock was a small radio station with a phone, radar, and a radio. Ish2 grabbed the phone and dialed Alexander's phone number. It rang for 21 seconds.
Alexander- "King Alexander The Awesome speaking, who is this?"
Ish2- "King Alexander, I am Ish2, king of Bar Crab City. You may be aware of the war going on in the Barbearer Islands?"
Alexander- "Ish2, you're commanding the crab army!?"
Ish2- "Yes, and we need your help. We thought you could talk Coldless into ending the war and allowing peace?"
Alexander- "That would kill our relation with the Barbearer Islands! I can't do that, they're our only ally."
Ish2- "For peace?"
Alexander went silent for moment and Ish2 thought he had hung up. Then Alexander came over again.
Alexander- "I do like peace. But when this is done you owe me."
Ish2- "Thank you, sir. Thank you!"
Alexander- "Heimlich, I'm going to the Barbearer Islands to work out a peace treaty with Coldless and the crabs."
Heimlich- "You are, sir? Well I wish you all the luck in the world on it!"
Alexander- "You're coming with me."
Heimlich- "What!? I refuse to."
Alexander glared at Heimlich just hard enough to make him finally agree. At that time a guard came in and said the plane was ready for take off. Alexander picked up his suit case and waddled out his door.
Alexander- "Take these to the plane, please."
Guard- "Yes, sir."
Heimlich- "I cannot believe you're making me go!"
Alexander- "You are my adviser."
Heimlich(whispering to self)- "Or puppet master."
Alexander- "What was that?"
Heimlich- "Nothing, nothing."
Coldless sat at a table, which projected a holographic image of the Barbearer Islands. During the last 3 months he had become very evil, and started to yell a lot. He always carried around his Keysaber, which whenever he got made would slice something or someone. Lane Ants had tried to stay his distance from him, too. Coldless turned on his Keysaber and angrily threw it through a wall.
Coldless- "Those dumb crabs have driven me to the breaking point!"
Coldless turned off the holographic image and waddled away. He picked up his Keysaber and walked the door. He walked onto a balcony where he saw Topia, which was still rebuilding itself. Just then Lane waddled to Coldless.
Lane- "Sir, we have-a some, um-a, problems."
Coldless- "What kind of problems?"
Lane- "We picked up-a a transmission, that was-a sent by the crabs-a to Yow."
Coldless- "I'm listening.."
Lane- "They want-a peace! And Alexander is on-a his way to work-a out a peace treaty."
Coldless- "Alexander dares turn on me! Why that little..."
Lane- "Sir, the crabs-a want to end-a the war! Is that not-a good thing?"
Coldless- "They started this war, and you know who's going to end it?"
Lane- "Um-a, Alexander?"
Coldless- "If you weren't my crown's successor I would so kill you right now!"
Lane- "I am-a your successor? Thank-a you, sir."
Coldless- "Leave me!"
Coldless angrily waddled away. Lane stood there frowning. Coldless had turned evil, probably as evil as Darktan.
Lane- "Guess-a who is-a working for the crabs-a now? Me!"
Coldless stopped and slowly turned back at Lane. His face scaring the living day light out of Lane.
Coldless- "What did you say?"
Lane- "Uh, nothing. What-a traitor?"
Coldless- "Are you turning on me?!"
Lane smoothly reached down for his Keysaber. When he grabbed it he flung it up and turned it on.
Lane- "I-a guess this means-a yes."
Coldless also pulled out his Keysaber and pointed it at Lane.
Coldless- "Die, traitor!"
Coldless lunged forward at Lane, and quickly ducking he missed Lane. Lane whacked his Keysaber against Coldless', and the two begun to duel. The two got into a duel and started to inch their way to a stair well. Just then General Bot1 came out onto the balcony.
General Bot1- "Sir!"
Coldless- "This is my fight. But some dramatic music will help."
General Bot1- "Um, okay sir."
The general pressed some buttons and music started to play, something that sounded like this:
Lane- "You are-a still as-a crazy as-a ever, Coldless."
Coldless- "And you're still as dumb!"
Coldless whacked Lane's Keysaber really hard sending him backwards. Lane landing on the ground and watched as his Keysaber fell off the balcony. Coldless stood above Lane with his Keysaber, while smiling.
Coldless- "Any last words?"
Lane- "Ya-a, does this-a hurt?"
Suddenly Lane kicked Coldless and jumped off the balcony, with the music still playing. Coldless looked over to General Bot1.
Coldless- "Shut off the stupid music. This is not a story!"
General Bot1- "Yes, sir."
Coldless- "And call the guards, tell them to kill Lane Ants."
General Bot1- "Yes, sir."
The general left with Coldless following him behind. Lane looked up at the balcony when doors opened up and in came robots.
Lane- "Great. Just-a what I need-a."
Lane grabbed his Keysaber and turned it on. He had truly moved to the crab's side.
Alexander looked out the window of his private jet, and saw the water zooming by. He turned back to a magazine he was reading when Heimlich spoke up.
Heimlich- "Why did I have to come, my king?"
Alexander- "You're good with peace treaties."
Heimlich looked out his window to see the Topia coming over the horizon. It looked really great from far away, but when the plane was flying above it it looked horrible! Burnt down buildings, wrecked cars, destroyed roads, everything was destroyed.
Heimlich- "Oh my gosh."
Heimlich- "Look out your window, sir."
Alexander looked out his window and gasped at the horrific scene.
Alexander- "Those crabs are truly powerful."
A transmission from the cockpit came over the speakers in the cabin.
Pilot- "We will be landing in Topia soon. So make sure your seat belts are buckled nice and tight, and your tray tables are stowed."
Heimlich- "Like I haven't heard that before."
Pilot- "I heard that!"
Alexander laughed as Heimlich blushed. The plane soon landed and Alexander walked out. He was greeted by Coldless and several robots.
Coldless- "Alexander, long time no see!"
Alexander- "It's nice to see you again, Coldless. It's been ages!"
Coldless- "Yes, yes it has."
The two penguins waddled off talking and left Heimlich behind. Heimlich turned to one robot who did not leave and whispered.
Heimlich- "Are you against Alexander?"
Heimlich- "I do too. Together we can destroy him."
Robot- "I do not need you to do so. Coldless and the entire army has begun to dislike him."
Heimlich caught up with Coldless and Alexander, who were currently talking about peace.
Coldless- "So, what did you come here for?"
Alexander- "This silly war must end. There is no point for it!"
Coldless- "Not true."
Heimlich- "Alexander, do tell Coldless about the peace dinner."
Alexander- "Oh right. You see, I've invited Ish2 and Dare23 over to discuss things over a peace dinner."
Coldless- "Alexander, you dare do such a thing!?"
Alexander- "Well, yes."
Coldless- "I knew I couldn't trust you. GUARDS!"
A group of robots came flying in and surrounded Alexander and Heimlich. The robots grabbed them as some other robots fought off Alexander's guards.
Heimlich- "What is the meaning of this?"
Coldless- "Everyone has been turning on me. Well no more! This war is mine for the taking."
Alexander- "We're friends! How could you?"
Coldless- "Same thing I wondered when Lane turned on me!"
Heimlich- "I can see why he turned on you. You've become evil!"
Coldless- "I am not evil!!!"
Alexander- "You throw your own friend in prison, and what for?"
Coldless- "Those crabs will pay for their stupidity. Throw Heimlich and Alexander in the dungeon."
Robot- "Yes, sir."
Lane sat in the cold cell while looking at a wall. Coldless had captured him and threw him in the dungeon. Lane grabbed a rock then threw it at the wall. He kept thinking about Coldless, and how he had turned from good to evil.
Lane- "He is-a evil!"
Just then two robots came in holding chains. Lane looked out of his cell and saw Alexander and Heimlich in shackles.
Lane- "Alexander, what are-a you doing a here-a?"
Alexander- "Coldless found out we were going to help the crabs."
Heimlich(whispering to self)- "I would have helped him capture Alexander."
Alexander- "Heimlich, you've been acting strange since I told you we were coming to the Barbearer Islands. Are you okay?"
Heimlich- "Ya, I'm fine."
The robots put Alexander and Heimlich in separate cells, and locked them in there.
Heimlich- "You'll never hold Alexander the Awesome, or Heimlich the Great!"
Robot- "We already have."
Alexander- "Hahaha, very funny."
The robots left, and the dungeon went quiet. They sat there for a couple of minutes until Heimlich spoke up.
Heimlich- "Sir, there must be a way out of here!"
Alexander- "This is no way."
Lane- "Well-a, you could-a contact the-a crabs."
Alexander- "Wait, wait! I got something that might help."
Lane- "What-a is i?"
Alexander took off his crown and messed inside it. It looked like he was pressing a few buttons, then a beep was heard.
Alexander- "I have an emergency phone built right into my crown!"
Lane- "Oh-a, wow!"
Alexander- "I'll call Ish2 for help."
Back at Ish2's office he looked at a map of the islands. The map had pieces on it, like chess. And the pieces were modeled like crabs and robots. When he was about to move a piece a crab came in.
Crab- "Sir, Alexander is in trouble! He and Heimlich are locked in cell at Fort Mchappy."
Crab- "Yes, and they need you and Dare23 to rush over there and free them."
Ish2- "Then let's go!"
Chapter 8 Freed
Dare23 and Ish2 raced onto the beaches of Billings and ran into the city. They sneaked their way to a Motor Scooter shop, and sneaked into by going through an air vent. They crawled their way to the front desk, then fell out of vent.
Ish2, Dare23- "AUGH! OOf!"
They landed on the front desk right in front of an employee.
Employee- "Crabs! Call the Cop Bots!"
Dare23- "Don't, or I'll slice your beak off!"
Ish2- "That's a little aggressive, don't you think?"
Dare23- "Listen, all we need is a motor scooter. Okay?"
Employee- "Yes, yes! Take anyone you want, just please don't hurt me."
Ish2- "We're not going to hurt you."
The crabs jumped off the of front desk and ran to the nearest motor scooter. They turned it on and drove right through the window and drove onto the street outside. Ish2 was driving as Dare23 sat at the back watching for enemies.
Dare23- "So how are we going to get to Topia?"
Ish2- "We'll board a ferry, and force the captain to take us to Topia."
Dare23- "Okay then, sir."
The motor scooter East and headed down a road that led towards a dock. At the dock was a large ferry getting ready to sail off. Ish2 gave the scooter some more gas, and started to go at full speed. The ferry left the dock and started to sail out, but Ish2 didn't stop the scooter.
Dare23- "WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?"
Ish2- "A daring stunt!"
The scooter came onto the dock. Up ahead Ish2 saw that a teenager penguin had set up a ramp, right by the dock's edge. Ish2 sped up towards it, went up the rap, then went flying through the air.
The scooter was right upon the ferry, then fell into the water right behind.
Coldless barged into the dungeon with a laser gun. His face was really red, and he looked extremely angry. He waddled over to Alexander's cell and banged on the bars.
Coldless- "You sent a transmission to the crabs!?"
Alexander- "You have no proof."
Coldless- "Bot, play that recording again.
Robot- "Yes, sir."
A small crackle was heard and then Alexander's voice came over, saying this:
Ish2, it's me Alexander! Coldless has locked us in his dungeon at Fort Mchappy. You have to free us. Hurry, Ish2!
The recording ended and Coldless stared at Alexander.
Coldless- "You'll never leave these islands!"
Alexander- "You shall not! My army will destroy you if you keep my imprisoned here."
Coldless- "I'd like to see them try."
Ish2 and Dare23 swam up to the boat and climbed aboard. They ran to the bridge where they surprisingly found a Yowien instead of a Barbearic.
Captain- "What!? Please don't hurt me."
Dare23- "We're not going to hurt you. Just drive this boat to Topia, now!"
Captain- "And why should I?"
Ish2- "Because King Alexander has been thrown in jail by Coldless!"
Captain- "Why didn't you say!?"
The captain pushed the throttle making the boat go faster.
Captain- "Hey, aren't you King Ish2?"
Captain- "Nice to meet you, sir."
Dare23- "Ya, ya. Can this thing go any faster?"
Captain- "It's going as fast as it can."
Ish2- "Well that this race we'll be to Topia by tomorrow!"
Captain- "Sorry, I can't make it go faster."
Dare23 walked onto the deck and started to walk in circles, thinking. He didn't come up with to make the boat go faster, nothing!
Dare23- "At this rate we'll never free Alexander from prison."
At that moment Ish2 walked onto the deck.
Ish2- "What is it Dare23?"
Dare23- "I'm trying to think of a way to speed up the boat."
Ish2- "Well..I have an idea."
Dare23- "What is it?"
Ish2- "I was thinking maybe we could put some super fuel in the engine."
Dare23- "Like what?"
Ish2- "Nuclear Energy! That will diffidently speed up the boat."
Dare23- "Or blow it up, nuclear energy may be too powerful for the engines to take. And where are we going to get nuclear energy?"
The captain came out onto the deck.
Captain- "Well I have solar panels that could power the boat's engines."
Ish2- "Weren't the ships in Race to Mars powered by solar panels?"
Dare23- "It is possible."
Captain- "Well let's go set up those solar panels, shall we?"
Ish2- "Alright, but who's steering the ship?"
Captain- "It's on auto captain."
Dare23- "Your boat has an auto captain feature?"
The boat came up to Topia and docked. There two robots came to the boat to investigate it for crab sources. Dare23 and Ish2 sneaked off by jumping into the water, and swimming their way to Fort Mchappy. There they came upon a group of trees, with a little snow on the tops of them. They sneaked to a large wall, and walked towards a vent. They took the crate off and walked into the vent.
Dare23- "Are you sure this is a good idea?"
Ish2- "Yes. Now keep quiet, Dare23."
Dare23- "Yes, king. So the dungeon should be the last level, at the bottom. So we'll go down until we see Alexander?"
Ish2- "Right. Do you have your Keysaber?"
Dare23- "No, but I do have my Snowball Gun."
Ish2- "I guess that will do."
The crabs kept crawling until they came upon a vent that went straight down. Ish2 grabbed both sides and slowly crawled their way down. When they made it to the bottom they heard Alexander talking. They went towards the sound until they suddenly fell out of the vent.
Dare23 and Ish2- "AUGH! OOF!!"
They landed on top of each other on the ground.
Alexander- "Ish2?! Come on free us!"
Ish2- "Don't worry. Dare23 keep an eye out for any guards."
Dare23 obeyed and watched the door as Ish2 sliced Alexander's cell open.
Alexander- "Thank-you my little red, hard shelled, friend."
Ish2- "No problem, but stay as quiet as you can."
Coldless- "Well, well, what do we have here?"
Ish2 turned around to see Coldless with his Keysaber.
Chapter 9 Alexander Leaves
Coldless swung his Keysaber at Ish2. Ish2 leaped towards his right and activated his Keysaber, then started to swing it at Coldless. The two began to duel, when robots came down to the dungeon.
Coldless- "Your father trained you well. Too bad he isn't here to see this!"
Ish2- "You killed my father, and my people!"
Coldless- "You started this war for no reason."
Ish2- "I didn't, Mr.Blue did! He is very sensitive."
Coldless whacked Ish2's Keysaber out of his claw and kicked Ish2 into the wall behind him. Ish2 slowly slid down the wall and fell to the floor. Coldless waddled over to him.
Coldless- "Stupid crab."
At that moment Ish2 grabbed Coldless' flipper and made him trip.
Coldless fell down and Ish2 climbed up onto his stomach. He looked straight at Coldless' eyes and then pinched his beak.
Coldless- "OUCH! Grrr... you stupid, dumb, worthless crab!"
Ish2- "I'm not worthless, you bub!"
Coldless- "That's it!!!!"
Coldless mindlessly ran after Ish2 and started to punch him, that's when Dare23 hopped onto Coldless' back and pinched his neck.
Coldless- "YOW! OUCH! Grrr! Stupid, crab!"
Dare23- "Be careful who you pick to fight next time."
Coldless shook his back throwing Dare23 off, then he grabbed Ish2 and threw him at a wall. He brushed his flippers off then grabbed a laser blaster. He started to shoot at Ish2. Ish2 quickly ran at Coldless and hit him in the head. Coldless was knocked out and Ish2 grabbed his Keysaber. He started to open the cells when the robots engaged on him. Ish2 turned around to see Lane slash the robots apart with his Keysaber.
Lane- "We have to-a leave now-a!"
Dare23- "You penguins won't fit in the air vents, so this will be tricky."
Heimlich- "The alarm probably went off already."
Dare23- "I don't hear anything?"
Lane- "It is-a a silent alarm-a."
Ish2- "Then let's get out of here before those flying junk piles get us."
The five creatures ran up the steps with their weapons activated, and ready.
Lane- "We should-a get to the-a armory, to get-a some more weapons."
Ish2- "Good idea, well let's go."
The group ran down the hallway and sneaked pasted some robots. They came to a big door that said, "ARMORY". The door also had a small screen and some buttons. Lane waddled up to it and pressed a few buttons, then the door opened. They ran in and grabbed some weapons to protect themselves. Dare23 grabbed a large bazooka, Alexander grabbed a Keysaber, Lane grabbed a Snowball Fun, Heimlich grabbed a dagger and laser blaster, and Ish2 grabbed a snow machine gun.
Dare23- "Oh yay, baby!"
Ish2- "Let's just go!"
The group ran out of the armory with their weapons loaded and ready. They didn't need to hide anymore, because now they could just destroy the robots.
Lane- "The exit is not-a far away-a. We-a are getting closer!"
Ish2- "Robots up ahead!"
Dare23- "Save your ammo guys, I got this!"
Everyone stepped back as Dare23 got in position and fired at the robots. Unfortunately the bazooka was so powerful it sent Dare23 flying backwards and hitting the rest of the group.
Group- "OUCH! AHH! OOF! GET OFF ME I'M ROYALTY!"
Dare23- "Hey, it worked!"
Lane- "Get-a off me, Alexander!"
Alexander- "Heimlich, get your tail out of my face!"
Ish2- "Dare23, get off of me."
The group untangled only to have more robot come towards them.
Ish2- "Let's use something a little less violent this time."
Ish2 turned on his snow machine gun and started to fire at the bots.
Ish2- "Haha! Take that you bucket of bolts!"
The robots were destroyed and the group ran further. They came upon and elevator and ran into it.
Lane- "This-a elevator needs-a code. Here let-a me."
Ish2- "Go ahead, I'm not holding you back."
Lane waddled up to a screen and pressed a few buttons. The elevator soon begin to go down, and the group breathed a sigh of relief.
Alexander- "Wow, that was crazy."
Heimlich- "I'll say, but what matters if that we're alright."
Ish2- "Hey, remember when Dare23 flew into us?"
Alexander- "That was so funny!"
Heimlich- "I second that motion. Hahaha."
Soon the whole elevator was laughing until the door opened. They stopped in fear as they stared right at a robot.
Lane- "I don't-a think so-a!"
Lane blasted the robot, and the group ran out of the elevator. There they met more robots.
The first level was almost completely destroyed when the group ran out the doors. They ran into the courtyard to run into more robots.
Ish2, Dare23- "Ya, I don't think we will."
They destroyed all the robots in the court yard and ran out to the city. They ran to a car dealership, which was still in great shape. They ran into the building, and to the front desk. Alexander showed his player card to the dealer.
Alexander- "Give us a car. No time to explain!"
Dealer- "Your, your King Alexander of Yow!"
Ish2- "Just give us the dumb car!"
Dealer- "Okay, okay."
The dealer handed them the keys, and they ran off. When they were in the parking lot, Ish2 pressed the key and they headed towards the car it was coming from. They got in, with Heimlich at the driver's seat. They drove onto the street at 70 miles per hour.
Alexander- "Okay if me and Heimlich are escaping, we need to go to the airport. Where my jet is."
Ish2- "But that plane was destroyed and the pilot was killed."
Heimlich- "We'll just go to the airport and get on one of the planes."
Lane- "That wouldn't-a do! Call-a one of your-a fighter jets."
Alexander- "Great idea!"
Coldless groaned as he waked up, his vision was pretty blurry but cleared up soon. Above him he saw nurse(not a robot) with a clip board. She wore massive glasses, and had the strangest hair do.
Coldless- "What happened?"
Nurse- "You were knocked out. Your bots rushed you over here, and I'm surprised you're not in a coma."
Coldless- "Where is General Bot1 and 445? I must speak with them."
Nurse- "No can do. You must rest, don't worry about the war."
Coldless- "I MUST KILL THOSE STUPID, DUMB CRABS!!!!"
A machine measuring Coldless' heart beat started to speed up, his heart beat increasing.
Nurse- "Calm down, sir."
Coldless- "AUGH! THOSE STUPID, DUMB..."
The nurse rushed over to a needle. She put some medicine and stuck it into Coldless.
Nurse- "It's for your own good. Doctor Noah!"
A doctor rushed into the room.
Doctor Noah- "What is is, Ashely?"
Nurse Ashely- "He's going crazy, so I put in some sleeping medicine."
Noah- "He needs to calm down, and sleep a bit more. Good work, Ashely."
Coldless- "I'M SO STINKING ANGRY! YOU'LL never put me to sleepppppp...ZzZzZzZz."
Coldless fell asleep when General Bots 1 and 445 came in the room. Due to the room's small size they barely fit in there.
General Bot1- "What happened?"
Noah- "He became dangerously angry, so he put him on some sleeping medicine."
General Bot445- "Tell us when he wakes. We must speak with him."
Noah- "Yes, sirs."
The car drove up to the airport just as a Yowien helicopter escorted by fighter jets landed. Alexander and Heimlich ran out of the car and waddled as quickly as they could to the helicopter. Ish2 stuck his head of the car's window.
Ish2- "Good luck, king! I hope we will not meet like this again."
Alexander- "Me, too! I fully support you crabs now, but Yow will not get in the middle of this."
Ish2- "I think you already are."
Alexander and Heimlich got onto the helicopter, and it immediately took off. The fighter jets were circling in the air, when the helicopter launched. They met up with the helicopter then took off. Lane climbed up to the front seat then did a wheely, sending Ish2 to the back of the car.
Ish2- "OOF! OUCH!"
Lane- "Oh, sorry-a! We need to-a go, now-a!"
Ish2- "HIT IT!"
Lane pushed the pedal all the way to the floor and car raced off. Ish2 climbed to the front and turned on some rock music.
Lane- "Now we're-a talking!"
Ish2- "I love this song."
At that moment five robots started to chase after the car.
Ish2- "Oh great, more flying bolts."
Lane- "I'll-a open the sun roof-a, you shoot-a them."
Ish2- "Got it."
The sun roof opened up, and Ish2 popped out of it. In his claws was a bazooka, and on his face was a smile. He fired at the robots, while laughing.
He destroyed the robots, but attracted more bots to the scene. He kept firing until he heard a click. His bazooka was empty, so he climbed back into the car. He soon came out with a snow machine gun, and started to fire it.
Ish2- "Where are we going, Lane?"
Lane- "I-a don't know-a! I need to-a think about it-a."
Ish2- "Well you better hurry, the robots are catching up on us."
Lane started to think, then it hit him. He sharply turned the car left and started to head East. He picked up speed when he saw a dock ahead, and a boat by the dock. He drove the car up onto the dock then jumped it onto the boat. A penguin was on the deck sun tanning, until he was suddenly in a shadow. When the car was about to land he screamed and ran off the deck.
Ish2- "Take that you stupid bots! Hahaha."
The robots stopped at the dock and watched the boat sail off. Lane turned the car off and got out. He went straight to the bridge where he found two penguins.
Lane- "Alright, sail this-a boat to-a Billings! Now-a."
Penguin 1- "Yes, yes. Alright."
Lane- "Full-a speed. Is that-a all you got-a?"
Penguin 1- "No, no. I, I um have more."
The penguin pushed a throttle and made the boat go faster.
Penguin 2- "What are you doing here, Viking?"
Lane- "Fighting in a war-a!"
Penguin 2- "What war?"
Lane- "'What war?' You don't-a know there is a war-a going on!? Where have-a you been living-a?"
Penguin 2- "Here in Topia."
Lane- "Were you-a here when it was attacked!?!?"
The penguin shook her head. Lane grumbled and walked out onto the deck. He met Ish2 sitting on a beach chair. Lane sat down next to him, and slouched.
Ish2- "What happened in there?"
Lane- "All is-a fair in love-a and war."
Ish2- "That doesn't answer my question."
Lane- "I know-a! Okay I am-a, wait hold-a on a minute. Where is-a Dare23?"
Ish2- "AUGH! I completely forgot about him! Dare23, where are you."
The two got up and started to look for Dare23 in the car. There they found him crushed under the car seats.
Dare23- "What happened?"
Ish2- "There you are, Dare23!"
Dare23- "Here I am. I guess?"
Lane- "I am-a glad you're-a okay, Dare23."
Dare23- "So Alexander is gone, Yow is in the middle of this war, and Coldless has turned evil? This war better end soon."
Ish2- "I hope for that."
Chapter 10 The Final Blow
In the last seven months of the war it seemed like the crabs would win. Coldless had been showing no mercy on the crabs, or his people. He had not protected cities from the war, and would sacrifice settlements just to destroy crabs. He had the robot factories speed up production, and the robots started to become a bit weaker. Also King Alexander had been shipping weapons over for the crabs, and they had a huge armory. Sadly Sockhopper was badly injured, and couldn't go out on the battle field. This forced him to stand back and help plan out battles.
WHEE WHEE WHEE!!
Coldless' alarm clock was going off. He whacked it with his flipper then sat up in bed. He put on his slippers on and stood up.
Coldless- "This better be the last day of the war. I'm getting tired of this."
Coldless waddled out his door and into the hallway. He walked down steps to the kitchen, then sat at a bar. A chef was standing on the other side, and he looked really happy.
Chef- "What would you like, sir?"
Coldless- "This war to end."
Chef- "Sorry, but I can't give that."
Coldless- "Just give me five pancakes, and a glass of orange juice."
Chef- "Okay, sir."
Coldless rested his head on the counter, at that moment General Bot1 came in.
General Bot1- "You're awake, sir. Good! I have some things I must speak with you about."
Coldless- "Can't we wait till after breakfast!?"
General Bot1- "No, sir. It is really important."
Coldless- "Wow, it must be really important to talk about before breakfast."
General Bot1- "Sir, you are disturbing."
Coldless- "Listen I am very weird in the morning. My mind doesn't think straight, and all I want is some breakfast. Oh, here it comes now!"
At that moment the chef put the plate in front of Coldless, then put down orange juice.
Chef- "Please, enjoy sir."
Coldless- "You got it!"
Coldless stabbed his fork into the pancake.
Ish2 stared at a map of Billings. On the map were chess pieces, that played the rolls of soldiers. Ish2 moved some around and looked at it again. He moved the pieces again, and again, and again, again, again, and again until Dare23 swam in.
Dare23- "Ish2, have you planned out the final assault yet?"
Ish2- "No, Dare23. It's just so confusing! All my plans don't seem to work."
Dare23- "Maybe if you got some help from Sockhopper? He's a great general."
Ish2- "Are you referring to the time he attacked Club Penguin with those crabs? Well I would have complete control of that island, and never loose it."
Dare23- "I see. Then why can't you plan this out right?"
Ish2- "I, I don't know. I'm just not on my A game today. The day that possible be the last of the war!"
Dare23- "You need all the help you can get, sir. Just invite Sockhopper to help you, please?"
Ish2- "Oh, alright. I'll move this stuff to the surface."
Dare23- "I'll help you."
The two crabs swam up to the surface where there was a large rock. On the rock was some small communication systems, and a hut will Sockhopper lived. It was crudely made, but was fine to the general. Dare23 knocked on the door.
Sockhopper- "I'm coming. I'm coming."
The door opened and Sockhopper looked down on Ish2 and Dare23.
Sockhopper- "What is it, Dare23?"
Dare23- "Ish2 needs your help on the battle plan. It needs to be perfect!"
Sockhopper- "Roger that, come on in."
Dare23- "Thank you."
The crabs walked into the small hut. Inside there was a bed, microwave, sink, and a radio. It was crudely made, with wood planks sticking out of the wall.
Ish2- "I hope this hut has suited you."
Sockhopper- "It's much better than my cave on Club Penguin Island, I'll say that!"
Dare23- "Well let's get to business. Shall we?"
Ish2- "Yes, we shall."
Sockhopper- "Show me the plans, Dare23."
Dare23 put a briefcase on the bed, while Sockhopper and Ish2 got onto it. He pressed a few buttons, then an holographic image appeared.
Dare23- "Ish2, you may take it from here."
Ish2- "Well okay then. So our forces are low in numbers, but not in Delete Missiles. I'm thinking we could distract the enemy, while the delete missiles get ready. Then when the signal is sent, we'll retreat. We'll have to move quickly! Then the delete missiles will strike the enemy!"
Sockhopper- "But what if our forces can't escape quick enough? We all know those robots are faster than crabs!"
Dare23- "Not to stop your parade, Ish2; but this is a bad plan."
Ish2 (sarcasm)- "That makes me feel so much better, Dare23."
Sockhopper- "Calm down you crabs! We need to make this plan perfect."
Ish2- "Well let's start then."
General Bot1 and 445 were assembling the troops, as Coldless sat on a bench. He stared at a holographic map of the battlefield: Billings. Coldless had assembled almost all his robots to Billings. He wanted this to be the last battle, when the crabs finally surrender to him. General Bot1 came to Coldless at that moment.
General Bot1- "Sir, we are ready to battle."
Coldless- "Good. Today shall be the last battle!"
General Bot1- "The crabs will be coming over the hill, so for advantage we will move our troops to the top before the crabs. That way we will easily fire down on them, while they will have to fire up."
Coldless- "It's a game of 'King Of The Hill'. Move the bots up the hill, we have no time to waste."
General Bot1- "Yes, sir."
The general left, and Coldless turned off the hologram. He waddled behind General Bot1 up the hill. When he got to the top he saw the first battle field. The land was growing flowers, and bushes. The robots lined up on the hill, ready for battle.
General Bot1- "Those crabs will be defeated for sure, sir."
Coldless- "Hehehehe, yes. And afterwards we shall have a massive party!"
No sooner than when Coldless said it a bazooka was fired at the bots. Five robots went down, then thousands of crabs came out of the woods. They were firing their weapons before the robots could even react to the situation.
General Bot- "Fire at the ones with bazookas! Fire at the ones on the front! Run them down, an run them through!"
The robots obeyed flew upon the crabs, firing down on them. Then the robots would come down and take the crabs head on. The robots were doing a good job of keeping them away from the hill.
Back at the crab command Delete Missiles were getting ready to fire. Ish2 watched the missile get loaded.
Ish2- "That missile better only hit the bot on the hill, or the crabs will be taken too!"
Crab- "Don't worry, sir. We've measured and calculated, it will not hit our forces."
Ish2- "Good. Cause this Delete Missile may win us the war."
Lane waddled up to Ish2 with some weapons.
Lane- "I-a got a transmission-a saying we are-a needed on the battlefield-a!"
Ish2- "I have to stay back here, Dare23 will go with you."
Dare23- "I'll do what?"
Dare23 walked up behind Ish2 with his snowball gun.
Ish2- "You heard me. GO!"
Dare23- "Yes, sir."
Lane- "Wait for-a me!"
Lane and Dare23 ran off to the battle field, as Ish2 ran towards the Delete Missile launchers. While checking it out he heard an airplane. Quickly he looked up and saw a fighter jet. The cockpit opened up and a penguin parachuted out. The plan crashed into the water as a blue penguin landed on the ground. Crabs surrounded the penguin, who was underneath the parachute.
Crabs- "Freeze! You're under arrest!"
Two Keysabers lit up and hit the crabs. The penguin pushed the parachute off of him, and under it was Coldless!
Ish2- "Coldless, what re you doing!?"
Coldless- "Ending this stupid, pointless war. I challenge you to a Keysaber duel."
Ish2- "On what consequences?"
Coldless- "If I lose you get half of Billings, If you lose you leave the islands."
Ish2- "I can't wait to have half of Billings!"
Coldless- "I can't wait to get rid of you. Music!"
Music that sounded like this:
started to play. Ish2 looked around and didn't see any music players or bots playing it.
Ish2- "How did you do that?"
Coldless- "You'll never know, BECAUSE YOU'RE DEAD!"
Coldless swung his Keysaber hard at Ish2. Ish2 dodged it and jumped behind of Coldless, then started to whack him real quick. Ish2 stepped back then ran at Coldless. Coldless dodge him and stepping to his right and sticking out his foot, making Ish2 trip. Ish2 collapsed to the ground, then turned around. Coldless jabbed his Keysaber right next to Ish2.
Coldless- "You're pathetic, lousy, pointless, and dumb! You started a war for no reason!"
Ish2- "I didn't, Mr.Blue did. He is a really sensitive. He was getting old, and acting weird!"
Coldless- "Well then I put him out of his misery."
Ish2- "You ate him raw, in front of me! You ate my father."
The two continued to duel, just as a Delete Missile was launched. It caught Coldless' attention right away.
Coldless- "You tricked me!"
Ish2- "Your army is going to be deleted soon, Coldless! You loser."
Coldless- "I am not a loser! I am a winner, because I will win this war!!"
Coldless kicked Ish2 at least 10ft away. Ish2 landed under a tree. When he looked forward he saw Coldless run straight at him. Just as Coldless was about to slice him Ish2 dodge, and Coldless sliced the tree by mistake. The tree fell over onto the missile launcher and destroyed it.
Coldless- "How about that!?"
Ish2- "HOW ABOUT THIS!?"
Coldless looked up to see Ish2 flying down on him with his Keysaber. Coldless was slow t dodge it, and his cape was cut off. The two begin to whack each other again, until Coldless threw his back out and fell to the ground.
Coldless- "AUGH! I'm back, I'm back. I can't move!"
Ish2- "You shouldn't duel Keysabers while you're sixty years old, Coldless. A lesson learned."
Coldless- "ARGH! You win. You can have half of Billings to yourself. AUGH! I'm back, I can't move. ARGH!"
Ish2- "We won! We won! Bar Crab City won the Barbearic Crab War!"
Crabs- "We won! We won! We won!"
Ish2- "We won! We won! We won! Coldless, command your robots to stop attacking. Immediately."
Coldless- "Fine, Ish2."
Coldless reached for his cape. In it there was a pocket, and in the pocket was a remote. He grabbed the remote and clicked a button that said 'Retreat To Fort Mchappy'.
Back at the battle field the robots stop attacking and immediately turned East and started to fly away. Dare23 and Lane looked at each other and smiled.
Dare23- "We won the war!"
Lane- "We won-a the war-a! Woohoo!"
Crabs and Lane- "Woohoo! Woohoo! Woohoo! We won! We won!"
Back at command Sockhopper came out and found Ish2 and the crabs cheering.
Sockhopper- "What is it?"
Ish2- "We won the war, Sockhopper! We won the Barbearic Crab War. Woohoo!"
Sockhopper- "Yay! Cream Soda for all. Woohoo!"
After the war Yow and the Barbearer Islands lost their relationship, and soon became enemies. Bar Crab City was allowed to control half of Billings, and Prince Lane was later captured by Coldless and thrown in prison. Coldless became evil, and some Barbearics moved from the islands. Ish2 became a well known king and general, and Sockhopper was given the Medal of Honor by Ish2. Soon news about the war spread throughout Antarctica, and the view on crabs had completely changed. Penguins started to see crabs as other intelligent creatures, capable of many things. It also begin a new chain of wars called The Crab Wars, they took place in 2012 though 2014.