Deletion Crystal

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silicooxysilicoate
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Image caption
Information
Type Crystal
Effects Deletes any object or entity it is used on.
Source Appears spontaneously near any Bureau of Fiction entrace.
Location Banhammers, Deletion Missiles, TurtleShroom (penguin)'s Deletion Staff...
Cost to buy 5748.46 coins
Cost to sell 5748.46 coins. It doesn't wear out.




Deletion Crystals are rare crystals used for the Deletion of objects or entities. It is formed out of a Fourth-Wall-disturbance byproduct known (unoffically, of course) as silicooxysilicoate radical.

Description[edit]

Deletion Crystals look like red, glowing crystals of varying size. They form spontaneously around places where the Fourth Wall thins out. If enough kinetic energy is applied to it, it will delete the object nearest to it. Unfortunately, the standard kind has a low deletion rating and is inefficient for deleting objects larger than an Emperor Penguin.

Flux Variety[edit]

A special variety of Deletion Crystal, called a Deletion Flux Crystal can be obtained by exposing a normal Deletion Crystal to Hawking Radiation, which is emitted by black holes. This kind of crystal, as a side effect of its radiation, is unstable and rips apart the spacetime continuum, stealing hypothetical matter from vacuums and using that matter to replicate itself. This causes the crystal to double in size every one to two hours. Another side effect of the Hawking Radiation is that the crystal can run on any kind of energy as well as kinetic. This makes the crystal more potent in warfare.

Doctor Hickory brought one of these crystals to Earth and, having no use for it, presented it to the leaders of Redlink Abbey. The nerds later figured out that the crystal possesed a much higher deletion rating than the normal Deletion Crystal and put them to work in weapons engineering.

The nerds, after allowing the crystal to replicate itself a bit, were able to temporarily stop the crystal's growth by aiming lasers at it, which also further increased the deletion rating of the crystals. Placing a stabilized crystal into the warhead of a AGM-119 missile, they presented the now-extremely-dangerous weapon to the USA and the Deletion Missile was born.

Trivia[edit]

  • The normal variety has a deletion rating of 0.5 joules. The flux variety has a rating of up to 3 joules, six times as much. Stabilizing a flux crystal with lasers adds an extra joule of deletion energy to the rating.
  • It's made of a stabilized silicooxysilicoate radical.
  • It's found in Banhammers and Deletion Missiles.
  • It's red.
    • The flux variety is neon purple.
  • If the piece is too small, the crystal may crumble to dust.
  • Bizarrely enough, some people like sucking them. They apperently taste like carrots.
  • Paffles are able to find crystals located throughout Antarctica for weaponry.

Internal Links[edit]