Dennis the Oppressive

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Dennis the Oppressive
Dennis the Oppressive
General
Alias Dennis the Oppressive
Born Dennis
October 20, 1993 (1993-10-20) (age 26)
Characteristics
Species Penguin
Race Adelie Penguin
Gender Male
Height 2'9"
Faction
Residence Nomad
Family
Parents Mother Susan
Norm Alman
Relatives Savage Steve
Destrukul'ek vez Omucron from Accounting
Profession
Occupation "Sith Lord"
Years Active 2011-present
Political Career
Political Party Dennis Party

Speaker.png Click here to listen to Dennis the Oppressive's theme!

CANNOLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAY!
 
— Dennis when he wants cannoli

Dennis (also known as Dennis the Oppressive, mostly by himself) is a very edgy penguin. Despite not being Force-sensitive, he claims to be a Sith Lord because he built his own knockoff keysaber, which has a very unstable blade because he accidentally dropped the battery in the snow when he was trying to put it in. He prefers to live nomadically, causing him to get involved in lots of shenanigans around Antarctica with his brother and "Sith" apprentice Savage Steve.

Biography[edit]

Early life[edit]

Dennis hatched into a mostly edgy family, and was the oldest of three brothers. He took after his mom, a delusional and edgy penguin who was convinced she had magic powers, basically what Dennis would become later in life.

In 2008, Dennis and his brother Steve encountered a creepy old penguin named Daft Serious, who was bribing edgy penguins like them with candy to join his great nephew Kyle-Ron's edgy rock band, Night of Edge. Naturally, feeling edgy, angsty, moody, and various other teenage emotions, they accepted, with the free candy being the icing on the cake. Dennis lied about being musically talented, and was assigned to be the band's keyboardist, while Steve became the drummer. Shortly after, Dennis developed a crush on the band's guitarist, but unfortunately for Dennis, she was completely uninterested in him.

One day early in 2011, Dennis was at home watching TV when he saw a cannoli truck pass by outside the front window. Seeing the truck advertising his favorite food, Dennis shouted "CANNOLEEEEEEEAYYYYY!" and ran outside to chase it down and get some cannoli. From sheer willpower and the desire to have cannoli, he managed to chase the truck on foot for over a half an hour until it finally stopped and Dennis was able to buy cannoli. Unfortunately, Dennis wasn't paying attention to where he was going the entire time and got lost, and would not return home until the following year.

Becoming a "Sith"[edit]

Dennis after declaring himself a Sith Lord

Now on his own, Dennis decided the only logical thing to do at this point would be to become an edgy (well, edgier than he already was anyway) loner. After researching ancient tales of the Jedi and Sith, Dennis was convinced that he had the Force and was destined to be a Sith Lord. He smeared some red paint on his face to look edgier, and then decided to get his own keysaber. He built a mediocre raft and set sail for Ed Island, but he had no idea what he was doing and ended up on at least 9 other islands on the way.

Despite his incompetence, he eventually made it to Ed Island and somehow managed to break into Ed Laboratories and not get himself killed doing it. Even more surprisingly, he accomplished what he went there to do and stole keysaber blueprints. He escaped and sailed back to his home on a new raft because he had forgotten where he left his old one, where he got to work taking apart various electronics and rummaging through trash cans, trying to create something that resembled a keysaber. Somehow, he actually managed to create a keysaber, but when he turned it on it exploded in his face. Undeterred, after more scavenging he was able to rebuild the keysaber with the addition of exhaust vents. Just as he was about to turn it on for the first time, he dropped the battery in the snow, causing the signature unstable and crackly blade, although whether it was the wet battery or the fact that the keysaber was a knockoff built out of spare parts that caused it is up for debate.

Dennis decided his next move would be to get a Sith apprentice, so he decided to look for a "Sith Apprentice Store", assuming that was where all Sith got their apprentices. While looking for the Sith Apprentice Store, he wandered into a McDoodle's, where he ordered a Big Pac and left, determined to find an apprentice. Suddenly, something in his edgy brain clicked and he returned home to find his brother Steve in March of 2012. Much to Dennis' dismay, he soon found out that Steve was a lot better at being edgy than him. Nevertheless, he asked Steve to be his apprentice anyway, and Steve accepted because he was bored and had nothing better to do. Using the stolen blueprints, Steve created his own double-bladed keysaber and they set out to conquer Antarctica like true Sith.

Dennis' jealousy of Steve quickly got the best of him though, and he decided that he needed to be even edgier. While browsing the internet, he saw a cool cosplay from Penguin Con with horns on it. Because he was too cheap to buy anything, he found some rocks resembling horns in the wilderness and taped them to his head. However, the tape didn't really work out because the rocks kept falling off his head, so he glued them on instead. The glue worked a little too well, and he still hasn't figured out how to get them off.

Dennis' nemesis menaces[edit]

In May 2012, Dennis and Steve decided to go to Taco Ball. Unfortunately, the penguin preparing Dennis' taco was sick and sneezed into it, passing his illness onto Dennis. A few days later, Dennis' cold surfaced, so he began attempting to get rid of it by eating junk food and doing basically nothing. While eating potato chips and watching Steve train with his keysaber, he suddenly started choking and coughed up a strange black substance which formed into an aqua penguin with a glorious head of hair. His first words to the edgy brothers were "hello there", before Dennis ignited his keysaber and the two moved to attack. Realizing what was about to happen, the X-Antibody quickly fled.

Dennis had several chance encounters with the X-Antibody, who named himself Toby-One, later that day. Toby-One ordered the last french fries at McDoodle's, bought the last box of Dennis' favorite cereal, and blocked Dennis from crossing the street by helping an old lady. From that day on, Dennis declared Toby-One his greatest nemesis.

Menacing Antarctica[edit]

In 2013, Dennis and Steve went on vacation to Valnordore. Steve mostly stayed at the hotel the whole time, so Dennis left him behind to go see the sights. Through a series of unfortunate events, Dennis inadvertently killed their leader, Duchess Saltine, and caused a power struggle which cut their vacation short.

In May 2018, inspired by Shops Island's discovery and rapid rise to being an Antarctic power, Dennis decided to colonize an uninhabited island and do the same, and later conquer the rest of Antarctica with it. To achieve this, Dennis built a raft, brought Steve along, and went sailing aimlessly around the ocean. They eventually stumbled upon the mobile island database of Archiva and broke in. Dennis utilized Archiva's equipment in an attempt to find secrets that would aid him in taking over Antarctica, inadvertently discovering that Swiss Ninja was a Sith in the process, and looking up data on various criminal organizations for future use. Before they could make their escape, they were stopped by one of Archiva's caretakers, who blasted them with a teleportation gun that sent them to Chill Island, where they attended a Techno State party before leaving.

In June, Dennis broke into the Snowtendo HQ in Shops Island during the development of Super Smash Mates U.B.E.R. and forced them to add him as a playable character in the game. This resulted in a superior version of Dennis who actually had Force powers being playable in the game, with an upgraded appearance because the developers didn't think he looked cool enough.

Forming the Oppressors[edit]

Involvement[edit]

  • Musical Artist - During his teenage years, Dennis played keyboard in Night of Edge. Unable to read sheet music, he just pressed random keys hoping to hit the right notes, and was somehow accidentally able to play correctly most of the time.
  • "Sith Lord" - Convinced that he is destined to be a Sith Lord, Dennis' ultimate goal is to conquer Antarctica like a true Sith. He is a firm believer in the Rule of Two and will not hesitate to attempt to destroy any Sith he meets.
  • Politician? - Dennis has run for office in several countries multiple times, with the campaign platform of "distracting you from those boring old problems by making fun new ones". Needless to say, he has never won any of these elections.
  • Crime Boss

Attributes[edit]

Personality[edit]

Dennis is a very edgy penguin, and takes great pride in his edge. He is secretly jealous of his brother Steve for being edgier than him, although would never admit to anyone that he thinks Steve is edgier. Dennis is very impatient, has a short attention span, and gets bored easily. Rather than thinking through situations, Dennis often solves all his problems with his keysaber. Like his mother, he is delusional and fully believes that he has special powers, which in this case is Force-sensitivity. He is somewhat of a cheapskate and prefers to purchase knockoffs or make things himself instead of buying the real deal, and rarely visits restaurants that aren't fast food establishments.

He has little respect for others, and often refers to older people as "grandpa" or "grandma". He isn't the brightest individual and can sometimes be unobservant, often insulting others for traits that he also has, or saying no one would do something that he did earlier or plans to do, failing to see the similarities unless someone else points it out, usually Steve. He is quick to declare others as his nemesis in various aspects, and desires their ultimate destruction; this includes Stealth for edginess, Swiss Ninja for the position of Sith Lord, and his ultimate arch-nemesis Toby-One for "generally everything".

Despite his many shortcomings, Dennis has a large ego and puts on a facade to those who don't know him in order to appear more impressive and powerful than he is. While Dennis' facade is partially an intentional ruse, it also comes from his delusions. His facade is essentially what he believes he is, rather than who he actually is.

Strengths[edit]

Dennis, while being generally bad at life, is also unrealistically lucky, often stumbling through life and achieving his goals through pure accident.

Weaknesses[edit]

Despite claiming to be a Sith Lord, Dennis is not Force-sensitive and has no real powers of his own, unless making others extremely uncomfortable with his presence counts. He is also completely untrained in keysaber combat and merely swings it around wildly.

Equipment[edit]

  • Keysaber - Dennis uses a keysaber built by himself out of random parts and salvage using stolen blueprints from Ed Laboratories. It has a unstable red blade because he dropped the battery in the snow before turning it on, giving it a unique crackly appearance. Unlike most keysabers, it uses a crossguard design with exhaust vents to prevent the keysaber from exploding; despite this, it still has a tendency to overheat if left activated for a prolonged amount of time. The hilt is spraypainted black, but it has been scratching off from years of use, especially around the emitters, where the heat from the blade has melted it off.
  • MP300 - A Zhouese knockoff of the MP3000, since Dennis is too cheap to get a real one. It is black, Dennis' favorite color, and contains a playlist of all the edgy songs he likes. Dennis is too much of a cheapskate to actually purchase these songs, but also doesn't know how to pirate, so he converts WaddleTube music videos into MP3 files.
  • Telekinesis gem - When the Destruction Gems were scattered following Constantine's defeat, the Telekinesis gem just happened to hit Dennis on the head. Dennis believes that the gem has no powers of its own and that it is some sort of "Force conduit" that he channels his own telekinesis through.

Personal life[edit]

Hobbies[edit]

Dennis usually spends his time listening to edgy music, eating cannoli, and plotting total domination of Antarctica.

Diet[edit]

Dennis' diet consists mainly of junk food, and he often frequents fast food restaurants like McDoodle's and Taco Ball. His favorite food is cannoli, and he screams whenever he wants it, making anyone near him extremely uncomfortable.

Residence[edit]

Dennis prefers not to be committed to any particular place, and lives nomadically with his brother Steve, usually within the United States of Antarctica. Since leaving the family home, Dennis has not lived anywhere for more than a few months. He usually squats in vacant buildings, but is willing to camp outside when he has no other options, albeit for very short amounts of time.

Publicity[edit]

Despite causing mayhem across Antarctica and running in many elections, Dennis was not well known by the general public until the formation of the Oppressors.

Portrayal in media[edit]

Dennis makes an appearance as a playable fighter in Super Smash Mates U.B.E.R., as a result of him breaking into the Snowtendo headquarters of Shops Island during development and forcing them to add him. As the team naturally assumed he was Force-sensitive due to his Sith claims, nearly all of Dennis' special moves involve Force abilities. His appearance was also heavily upgraded, as the team decided he didn't look cool enough. His hoodie was replaced with proper Sith robes, the rocks glued to his head were replaced with actual horns, his smeared facepaint was replaced with actual tattoos, and he was given a muscular build. He was one of the final fighters created for the game, since Dennis' break-in wasn't until development was in its final months.

Relationships[edit]

  • Destrukul'ek vez Omucron from Accounting - Dennis considers his youngest brother a disappointment to the family because of how normal he is and disowned him during his teenage years. Dennis almost never talks about him, and acts as if Steve is his only brother.
  • Mother Susan - Dennis has a lot of respect for his mother, and ultimately ended up being a lot like her.
  • Savage Steve - Although Dennis is secretly jealous of Steve for being edgier than him and often puts him down, he is one of the only people Dennis truly cares about. Steve is one of the few penguins who can actually put up with Dennis on a regular basis.
  • Scrubbypingu - Scrubbypingu once followed Dennis while he was trying to learn how to be a Sith. This annoyed Dennis, who took the broom handle he was using as a lightsaber and told him to go away.
  • Stealth - Dennis considers Stealth to be the edgiest penguin in all of Antarctica, and thus a rival to his own edge.
  • Swiss Ninja - After discovering that Swiss Ninja is a Sith, Dennis seeks to eliminate him in accordance with the Rule of Two.
  • Toby-One - Although Toby-One is a nice person and has never intentionally done anything wrong to Dennis, Dennis still despises him for his "many transgressions" against him, which are all actually just minor inconveniences that Toby-One indirectly caused. He is also jealous of Toby-One's "superior" Force powers, hair, being an inch taller than him, and other various qualities. Dennis often blames anything that goes wrong in his life on Toby-One, regardless of how possible it would be that Toby-One could cause those events.

Chronology[edit]

Quotes[edit]

  • "TOBEEEEEEEEEAYYYYYYYYY!"

Trivia[edit]

  • He is convinced that somewhere in his family tree is the Sith Lord that killed Fly-Gong Yinn.
  • Dennis once found an old Sith Holocron, but couldn't open it because he isn't Force-sensitive. He assumed it was useless and threw it into the trash.

See also[edit]