Department of Fonts

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The Department of Fonts is a department in the Bureau of Fiction in charge of managing language and text in general.


Font Production Office[edit]

This area of the department is home to the largest concentration of woodworking equipment in known Antarctica. Designers and metal workers come here to fashion every character (yes, including unicode) known to man. In a room next door (thankfully the woodworking room is soundproofed) designers work around the clock to draw up new fonts, which are sent through to the woodworking room to create wooden copies of them.

Cloning Office[edit]

These wooden letters are sent through here. Where they are ran through a cloner that utilizes Wutt Energy, this is to ensure that there is always a spare set of a font in case they get lost or destroyed (and you really don't want that if a font vanishes off the BoF computer network). In the olden days, when computers were not used in the Bureau, this area was a giant foundry that used the wooden shapes as patterns to create moulds (the letters made from the moulds were sent directly to typewriters), if you lost a set then you would have to remake it.

Formatting Office[edit]

This area is the place where the font colours and other extra features are designed and created. At present the colours are fashion using using simple HSV/RGB colour pickers on board computers, but in the olden days typewrited ink and their respective ribbons were made here using mixers and chemicals for different colours. It was not until the advent of the computer that this area took the wheel for doing things like this or things like this or making text go like this or even this or maybe, just maybe, even this, before that the Font Production Office held that post because Wutt Energy manipulation was not a perfected art at the time.

Digitization and Shipping Office[edit]

A relatively new office in charge of sending the fonts to all the computers (even the Narrator's Organ). The finest high resolution cameras and steadiest hands work here to ensure that the letters are scanned into a computer to perfection. After the font has been scanned, triple-checked for mistakes and finalised the font is ran through a special application (courtesy of the Department of Computing) that distributes the font everywhere in the Bureau's computer networks.

Linguistics Office[edit]

A small room containing a small amount of computers, where everything to do with voice is done. Standard species voice pitch, speech speed, defining alphabet sounds and even whole new languages can be created using the few computers that reside here. Usually people who have just made a new character come here to set said character's voice. A larger computer, one of the oldest in the bureau, is tended to here. Without it, the universe would be mute, because that is the computer that tranlates words into sound using the other computers as parameter setters (so basically it would all be one big silent movie).