Farmish

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The Imperial Noocratic Dorkugese Territory of the Streber-Occupied Low-Tech Ilses of Farmish.
Flag of The Isles of Farmish
MottoThere's no school like the Old School.
AnthemAmish Paridise
Royal anthemOld McDonald had a Farm (LOL)
National Pastime
Butter churning
CapitalN/A
Official languages Morse Code, German
Recognised regional languages English, 1337, Binary
Species  Strebers
Demonym Farmish
Membership Territory of Dorkugal
Government Town Meeting
 -  1337 S3L3CTM4N Jebidi Yankovic
Legislature Board of Selectmen
 -  Upper House Selectmen
 -  Lower House the Commoners
Colonized Strebers settled this reigon in 2009. 
 -  Founded 2009 
Population
 -  2009 estimate 100,000 
 -  2009 census 103,729 
Currency Barter System (barter)
No
Drives on the Left
Calling code 555
Footnotes We've been spending most our lives, living in an Amish Streber paridise...


The The Imperial Noocratic Dorkugese Territory of the Streber-Occupied Low-Tech Ilses of Farmish, normally referenced as the Isles of Farmish, or just Farmish, is the largest community of Strebers in Antarctica and the primary supplier of computer part for Dorkugal, grown via the famous bushes that produce technology.

History[edit]

The Isles of Farmish were founded by the founder of the Streber community, Jake Pennsylvan, in 2009. It was founded for a more simple society where family values and friendship took the place of texting at the table (to someone sitting next to you) and other places where technology deprives communication.

Currency[edit]

The Currency of the Isles of Farmish is the Barter System, trading goods or services for another good or service. The Strebers do not believe in money, they claim it's unnessecary.

Language[edit]

The Strebers, like all nerd species, are fluent in English and Leet. However, they are also schooled in Morse Code, which, oddly, is used verbally. Strebers can actually have entire conversaions with beeping sounds (or the words dot and dash) coupled with the words of puncuation marks (e.g. dash dash exclamation point). Herb Tacet enjoys this.

Places[edit]

Geography[edit]

The land of Farmish is scenic and serene. Gently rolling hills and the occasional mountain (which fromed the island) are covered in snow year-round. Computer bushes grow fantastically in this area, as do lotuses.

Flag, Motto, and Anthem[edit]

The national flag of Farmish consists of two butter churners crossed over one-another with a candle in front with a black background. This is a symbol of their simplicity, low-tech, and of course, the Streper national pastime, butter churning.


Their motto is "There's no school like the Old School", one which fits their lifestyle as well. The anthem, "Amish Paridise", is also considered fitting for their culture. The royal anthem, Old McDonald had a Farm, is also very fitting, even though no one has a clue what a chicken or a pig is. They know that cows are in fact Moo Penguins in shapeshift mode, but pigs? No one has a clue.

Goverment[edit]

The Government, like all Dorkugese territories, is sovereign to the CEO of Dorkugal. However, Farmish is left to its own devices, running a simple directly represented democracy in an old-school town meeting with a board of selectmen. All Farmish males are allowed to vote regardless of age (but they must know the topic), Farmish females after fourteen. The board of selectmen elections are held semiannually.

Inhabitants[edit]

The primary inhabitats are Strebers, though the island gets a healthy dose of tourism and trade from the outsiders. Popular sights in Farmish are watching Streper chicks do nerdy things without technology, buying Streper-quality materials and items, and just relaxing.

Villains[edit]

The Strebers are peaceful characters, only using harsh dicipline on their own kind. However, flame wars between Strebers and Normals are very common, and there are debate houses for it, because flaming is a popular pastime in both Dorkugese and Streber culture.

However, Poshia has considered taking Farmish, though this has the Dorkugese in uproar on their low-tech brethren. Everyone agrees to not attack Farmish because it can not defend itself. "Besides", they claim, "what have the Strebers ever done to offend the Prepguin way of life?".

In case of an actual attack, Lichenblossom has agreed to protect Farmish, mostly because both cultures enjoy each other's food, hospitality, and friendship, and also because Lichenblossomese culture is the nerd culture most similar to the Streber beliefs.

Culture[edit]

"Instinkt Ausweichen"[edit]

"Instinkt Ausweichen", literally meaning "dodge instinct", are a set of pastimes, items, workarounds, and other things to prevent the Strebers from reverting back to using "the Enemy", AKA technology. Since Strbers are a Dorkugese subspecies and ethnic nerds, these penguins have to quench their nerdy instincts in other manners. Key behaviors common to all nerds have to be replaced or risk the Streber returning to "the Enemy".


  • Video games are replaced by butter churning, as are robot demolition derbies and computer building. Streber youth build the fanciest butter churners possible, which can run by flipper, steam, or anything at their disposal. The churners are then activated, and the contraption that generates the tastiest butter (as determined by the local elders) wins!
  • Flame Wars are replaced by debate houses, which are fancy buildings where Strebers and anyone who wishes to join can argue with one another over any topic under the sun, as is common in nerdy societies.
  • Fanboys, creatures whom are heavilly obbsessed and baised toward one corporate brand or another, are replaced by, well, fanboys. However, Streber fanboys' corporate devotions go to the two rival butter churner manufacturers in the territory.
    • It is split between BUTTA-DOS (Butter-Ultimate-Task-Timer Deluxe Oak Style) and Applewood brands. One of the most common debates in debate houses are "which butter churner brand is better". BUTTA-DOS fans cite that their butter is better butter and that the manufacturers allow easy customization. Applewood fans state that, unlike BUTTA-DOS, Applewood churners are less subject to wood rot and are far easier to assembe and churn with.
      • Strebel elders have no problem with the youth's feirce butter battles, they always say that it helps make more butter, and keeps their economy afloat. Farmish's #2 export is butter.
  • Stellar Travel conventions and technology clubs in general are substituted by "Versa Week", which is a trek across the ocean to Dorkugal. There, the Strebers stay and admire, gawk, and stare at the other half's strange world. They always leave knowing why "the Enemy" got its name.
  • Text and Instant Messaging are each replaced by typewriters. Adolescent penguins in Farmish are given clunky manual typewriters with which they can use to their heart's content.
    • Ironically, Strebel penguins, particularly young females, ended up doing what their counterparts do: sit next to each other and type to one-another, exchanging papers and feeding them into one another's console for communication. This can often be viewed as a direct violation of Jake Pennsylvan's code, but typewriters are easy to put down, and Strebel chicks are diciplined enough to do it when told. This is why they are legal.
      • Even more intriging is the rate that Strebel penguins can type with one of those "dinosaurs". A Strebel adolescent can tpye as fast as an cell phone using counterpart, at the same speed, with the same phrases (like LOL).


  • 1337 and chat room slang are, like in Dorkugal, an everyday aspect of life in Strebel communities. They are one of the few pure technological items that went into the Strebel cultire without any altering whatsoever.


  • MORE!

Ruleset[edit]

The Strebers follow a rigerious and amusing guideline of set doctrines governing everything in their lives, a code that attracts tourists just to see how nerds can live withour technology.

Lifestyle[edit]

  • No electricity unless needed for a vital emergency or for life support (such as oxygen tanks or electronic life-support items).
  • No cell phones, ever.
  • Under no circumstances should a computer be used unless it's an absolute emergency. Farmish has one computer, a Doors 3.0 with Internet access, located in the town hall.
  • Televisions are evil; NEVER own or use a television, ever. It's considered "brain rotting" and "bad for the imagination". Oddly, this is the same stance taken by the Governance back in the 1920s.
  • Plumbing, such as toilets and sinks, are both allowed and encouraged, but must be in a seperate room from the igloo and require a short waddle to the facility.
  • Bathtubs are regarded as pointless, penguins can clean themselves just as effectively by preening their feathers. Industrilized penguins also preen their feathers, though it is only for a quick cleanup or to completely clean themselves after a shower.
  • Dancing is discouraged. It's not a bad thing for a Streber to dance, but their subspecies can't dance. Dancing Strebers usually find their way onto the Internet and public humiliation, simply because they are that bad.
  • Anything electronic that could somehow reduce family communication, togetherness, friendship, or any core Streber value is banned. Also, if the item is pointless, like bathtubs, yodelling pickles, or spoonless yogurt, it will be banned because it's simply "in the way". For instance, why have spoonless yogurt when you can get up, waddle to the kitchen, and get a spoon?
  • Interestingly, imported foods such as potato chips, Poritos, nachos, and ice cream are all legal and perfectly acceptable to Strebers.
  • ADD MORE!

Dress[edit]

  • WRITE!

Streber alternate definitions[edit]

One of the most facinating features of Streber culture is to take common PC terms like "phising" and "spam", and use them for their own, low-tech definitions, which often allude to their dictionary counterparts.

  • A Strebel inbox is a physical postal inbox.
  • Spam, in Strebel culture, is receiving endless junk e-mail from the postal service, flooding one's inbox.
  • Phishing is posing as a legit fisherpenguin selling rotten or even fake fish. Upon purchase, the buyer recieves the lousy product.

See Also[edit]

External Links[edit]

  • Parody of the Amish Country, an area of the North American continent where large populations of the Amish culture live.