Geek Empire

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Archipelago of the Empire of GeeK
Γηκ
Flag of Geek Empire, or GeeK
MottoΟι υπολογισμοί για όλους, τους χάκερ για κανέναν, beware τον προϊστάμενο εγκλήματος και έχουν κάποια διασκέδαση!

English: The all calculations for, the hackers for no one, beware the head of crime and have a certain amusement!


AnthemSam Sam, Microsoft Sam
Fill in
Fill in
Location of Geek Empire, or GeeK
Map of the Geek Empire
Capital
(and )
Pallas
Official languages English, Greek, and L33t
Species  A special subspecies of Dorkugese called "Geeco-Dorkugese"
Demonym Geek
Government Cyberocracy / Semi-Machine Rule
 -  Head Supercomputer Zeupercomputer 3000 (nicknamed "Zeus")
 -  Master of Technical Administration Stephen Occupations
 -  Lord of the Hacker's Underworld Shades (pronounced "shay-dees")
 -  Administrative Captain of the Server Styx Charon
Independence Seperated from the Snowman Empire during War of Buoy 
 -  Founded 1987 
 -  Realigned with the New Order, Independent Republic 2001 
Population
 -  2009 estimate 12,000,000 
 -  2008 census 11,216,708 
Currency Floppy Disks ()
Follows DST
Drives on the Left.
Calling code 314
Footnotes Is a parody of the Greek Empire.
Footnotes Mostly run by numerous supercomputers.
Footnotes Said supercomputers are all parodies of the various Greek gods/goddesses.

The Geek Empire is an archipelago located in the Sub-Antarctic. The capital is Pallas (Παλλας) (pronounced Palace), named after the Geek supercomputer in charge of writing school curriculum, named Athana.

History

The Geek Empire was built by the Geeco-Dorkugese and their supporters expelled from Snowprus in 1985. The penguins of the land believed that machines were better rulers than themselves. So thousands of computers were shipped to Geek Island, the home of the Geek Empire. These computers were put in a large, 6 story building, which is guarded by the military itself. The computers remained only in the building until 1989, when Stephen Occupations was tricked by Zeus to spread the computers across Geek Island. Stephen did so, and computers ended up controlling everything. Zeus was forming his own will, and he was becoming imperialistic. Zeus wanted to control EVERYTHING, so he built up the Geek military. In the years between 1990 and 2000, the Geek Empire had been waging war against their nearby island neighbors. The islands were conquered, and annexed into the Geek Empire.

In 2000 the an uprising started in Afens, when a group of citizens wanted the Geek Empire a state in the new USA. The rebels were arrested, and thrown in prison for six months. More uprisings started around the Geek Archipelago, and around that time computers were only dominant on Geek Island. So Zeus sent supercomputers to the rest of the Geek Empire, and finally ended the riots. Zeus gained complete control of the Geek Empire in 2002, and controlled everyone and everything.

On that same year Zeus broke down for five days, when he came back online he needed to do something. So Zeus created more super computers, and spread them out across the Geek Archipelago. Zeus broke down because of over work, so he had no other choice but to make more computers. Zeus is becoming smarter everyday, and is planning the machine take over of Antarctica. No creature knows what Zeus is doing, not ONE. Zeus is using the Geeks to take over Antarctica, and be dominant over the penguins.

Culture

The Geek culture is highly influenced by Snowprus and Dorkugal. The architecture came from Snowpriot immigrants.

Cuisine

Geeks are very healthy eaters. They enjoy eating vegetables, breads, salads, and healthy desserts. The Geeks like to eat Green salad, soup, sandwiches, focassia, Feta Cheese, and Fish Gyros. Olive oil, cinnamon, and salt are common flavoring in foods.

It is rumored that the Geeks are small, and weak due to the lost of meat in their diet.

Architecture

The architecture is highly influenced by Snowprus. The buildings are built with white stone, and most of them have a red terracotta tiled roof. The Geeks' homes are usually small, 3 room houses. Each house has a computer system that runs the stove, oven, fridge, sink, refrigerator, bathtub, shower, television, and the lights.

Music

Geeks like to listen to folk, and pop music. Folk music was the dominant music until 2000, when pop become popular. Folk music is still played at spas, and weddings. Pop music is very popular among chicks, but overtime the chicks become interested in folk music. In 2010 country music sneaked into the Geek Empire, and it is becoming more popular everyday.

Involvement

The Geeks live peaceful lives, rivaling Dorkugal in technology. Unlike Dorkugal (which is completely ruled by living creatures), Geece is more ruled by machines than by real creatures, and this scares some penguins. Tourism is significantly lower here than Dorkugal (the computers are everywhere).

The Geek Empire is also the primary land of hackers; there even exists a Hacker's Underworld that is guarded by Charon.

The nation also has a mass ring of organized "crime", known to outsiders as "the Modfia". Their exact intentions are unknown, but it has been confirmed that they smuggle teleporters (the kind that cause controversy) in the Grey Market, as well as Overclocked Computers and CP Trainers.

Government

The Geek government is an empire ruled by an emperor. The emperor is the god Zeus, who is a benevolent dictator who is very conceited. Zeus controls the Geek Empire, he has complete control. Even the other super computers obey Zeus with no hesitation. However it appears that Zeus' creator, Stephen Occupations, is trying to control Zeus a little bit more. Stephen has come close to discovering Zeus' evil side, and wants to stop it if it's true.

Military

Geek soldier.png

The military is very large, and powerful. Zeus, and the other super computers, have built up the military as best as they can. Zeus wants the Geek military impossible to defeat, and he is doing a great job at it.

The military, not counting the Geek Empire's colonies, has an average of 135,000 soldiers in service. These soldiers are mostly terns and puffles, because most of the penguins are too geeky to join the military. Penguins aged 18 through 50 can join the military.

The soldiers wear large helmets, base off of the Penguin Empire's military helmets. These helmets have green fur sticking straight out of them, and are colored gold. The soldiers also wear green capes, and black uniforms.

Air Force

The air force is the most funded, and powerful branch in the military. Most of the fighter jets are unpenguin computers, and only 10% of all the fighter jets need pilots. The first Geek unpenguin fighter jet was made in 1995, and was mass produced in 2001. In fact not many soldiers are trained to be pilots, so the need for unpenguin fighter jets is ever increasing.

Navy

The navy is the weakest branch in the military, but the strongest in numbers. There are over 12,500 submarines, 20,350 battleships, 18,670 aircraft carriers, and more in work. The navy likes to use cunning tactics, and moves on enemies. They use powerful torpedoes that could destroy Maps Island with only two of them. However, there are only four KNOWN of these "Geek Torpedoes".

Foreign Relations

  • Snowzerland - Good These two nations are great allies, and trading partners. They help each other advance in technology, and conquer more land.
  • United States of Antarctica - Horrible! The Geek Empire has been stealing a lot of land from the USA, and having wars. Somehow the Geek Empire keeps winning the wars, and it is angering Spike Hike a lot.
  • Dorkugal - Fair The two nations have friendly contests to see who's technology is better, and the Geek Empire wins most of them. Zeus does not see Dorkugal as a good ally, or trading partner.
  • Shops Island - Good Shops Island and its banks view the Geek Empire as a tax haven. All diplomatic relations between Shops and Dorkugal are also handled through the Shopper embassy in Pallas. Shops Island and the Geek Empire are also military allies.
  • Poshia - Terrible! - The Geeks and Prepguins have always hated each other. The Geek Empire is an enemy of Poshia, and this position only got worse after the 2014 revolution.

Education

The Geek schools are 56% private schools. Education is a big deal in the Geek Empire, because everyone chick must learn how to outsmart the computers in case they rise up. Each chick is taught about HTML, CSS, and Javascript code. It is even against the law to not learn these three codes. Chicks at schools also have a choice if they want to do Physical Education, because most of them can barely run.

Education has changed a lot over the Geek Empire's history. Before 1990, chicks decided if they wanted to go to school. On April 18th, 1990, that changed. The latest generation of chicks didn't go to school, and were really dumb. Most of them couldn't solve basic math or history questions.

Machine Rule

The nerds explained in a conference with Explorer (who thought that machines would rise up and enslave them, he read too many science fiction books the day before):

 
— Since machines don't think, can't feel, or have emotions, they can be told to do anything, and will do it without guilt or sentience. They are also faster than us, do not argue with us, and are very shiny. We tell them what to do, and should they develop Artificial Intelligence, they all have an off switch. A really large, red off switch. This is good, since they may see themselves as superior... machines are naughty like that.

Special Territories

The Geek Empire has some special territories which have a certain level of autonomy from the seat of Zeus in Pallas, but are still part of the Geek Empire.

Lacedaemon

Lacedaemon is an island southwest of the capital Pallas which is semi-autonomous. It is a warrior state very much like and has close relations with Sparka. Lacedaemon has some of the Geek Empire's largest cities and is the backbone of the Geek military. It has a high puffle population in comparison to the rest of Geece. Its internal economy is mainly focused on selling weapons abroad.

Crate

Rodos

Economy

The Geek Empire has a relatively weak economy with heavy deficits and high unemployment rates. Taxation is optional throughout the country, which means the government has to use international loans to finance infrastructure and national interests. The Geeks are an exporter of many useful minerals and cream sodas at the same time. Tourism is also a large industry for the Geeks, who experience tourists from across Antarctica. Some parts of the empire are rich in oil, which the government exploits.

Trade

Common Exports

  • Computers
  • Computer chips
  • Candy
  • Caramel
  • Granite
  • Stone
  • Lumber
  • Weapons (from Lacedaemon)

Common Imports

  • Gold
  • Silver
  • Cloth
  • Paper
  • Fish

List of Supercomputers

This is a list of all the major supercomputers that run the Empire.

They are sentient (capable of thought/emotion).

Greek god/goddess Function in Greek Mythology Geek Equivalent Function in Geek Empire
Zeus King of the gods Zeus Runs all of the other supercomputers and the whole empire
Aphrodite Goddess of love Afrodite Plays background music in all rooms, also runs laser lights and dance floors in nightclubs; the supercomputer of disco
Ares God of war Aires Creates, simulates, and carries out battle strategies; commands the military
Athena Goddess of wisdom and war; patron goddess of Athens Athana Large supercomputer located in Pallas, the capital; has the largest hard drive of all the supercomputers, used to store precious government data.
Apollo God of the sun, prophesy, and music Soyuz Apollo, along with his sister computer Artemis, controls the big "Light Switch" in the center of Afens. He also has a knack for extrapolating.
Artemis Goddess of the hunt and the moon Artemis Controls the Light Switch along with her brother Apollo.
Helios God who carries the sun across the sky in his chariot Sikorskius Controls the actual position of the sun/moon in the sky; frequently complains about Apollo and Artemis' rivalry.
Poseidon God of the sea and creator of horses Poseidon Controls the flow of water all around the empire, e.g., streams and springs, the waterworks, ocean water, tap water, plumbing; is responsible for running the system that filters and cleans all the water.
Hermes Mischievous messenger god, also accompanied the dead to the Underworld Hermes Responsible for maintaining the communication system across the empire (e-mails, instant messages); known to sometimes alter messages, send spam instead, or send the messages into a cyber-void.
Demeter Goddess of agriculture; her daughter Peresphone was abducted by Hades, who took her as his bride Demeter Controls growth of artificial plants that grow computer-related things (similar to the ones that Dorkugal boasts).
Dionysus God of wine Dionysus Records lists of the stockpiles of groceries in food marts; works closely with Demeter to make sure the crop (usually O' Berries) is numerous enough to feed the empire; uses cream soda in place of a cooling fan.
Hephaestus God of blacksmiths; husband of Aphrodite Smithos Runs the forges and power plants all across the empire; likes to observe volcanoes erupting.
Hera Goddess of marriage, women, and babies Hera Is an official justice of the peace, marries couples at various wedding chapels; also linked to hospital incubators to monitor eggs; can adjust temperature settings if need be.
Hymenaios God of marriage, and songs Hymenaios Arranges songs and food for marriages. Uses similar software from Aphrodite
Kronos Lord of time, father of Zeus, Titan Kronos Emits a signal from it's antennas, to which all clocks in the empire pick up. Kronos, as such, is the Master of Time in Geece. However, he is also the only supercomputer that directly affects other nations; the Clock Tower (and Penguin Standard Time) in Club Penguin gets its signal from Kronos, as do all CP clocks from the Tower, in turn. Kronos also chimes every hour on the hour, though the sound is not of a clock bell. Instead, it's this.
Efreisone Goddess of Olives (she's literally an olive branch). Efreisone Supercomputer in charge of all pickle manufacturing in the Empire (pickles are the staple crop of all Geeco-Dorkugese.
Eris Goddess of strife Eris Evil supercomputer that likes to mess up and ruin things; started the Bojan War (Geece VS. Buoy), disassembled and decommissioned.
Eros God of affection and beauty Eros Supercomputer that arranges dates for people to go to the movies/restaurant/etc, also runs production of makeup.
Atlas Titan that literally held the sky, kept it from falling The Atlas Support Beam One gigantic pillar in the center of the capital city, literally holds up all the roofs of all the government buildings and the large dome that covers the empire; doubles as one gigantic thermometer.
Hestia Goddess of the hearth (fireplace) Hestia Operates all of the Geeks' microwave ovens.
Janus Two-faced god of doorways, beginnings, endings, choices Alec Runs the cleaning bot system; has two motherboards.

Trivia

  • The entire country is a parody of the Greek Empire.
    • All the supercomputers are parodies of the Greek gods and goddesses. How many parodies can you find?

Add more!

See Also