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Legend says that Keith looks like this simply to annoy Benny.
|Title||Master Illustrator of Universe #1337 (Club Penguin Fanon) and one of the Masters|
|Faction||Bureau of Fiction|
|Location||Bureau of Fiction|
Keith H. Aristhye (pronounced a-RIS-thee), or Illustrator Keith is the Master Illustrator of the entire universe and also the youngest Master of the Universe ever to be recruited. Looked down upon in childhood for being mentally unstable, Keith is extremely devoted to his work (most would call it obsession) and can get very hysterical in times of trouble. Nevertheless, he is a great guy to be around.... primarily for the lulz.
Keith Harold Aristhye was hatched in Blizzardville, Eastsheild, a medium-sized town near South Pole City. From hatching, he was diagnosed as being mentally unstable, and this disorder began to manifest itself in Keith's behavior.
Blizzardville is the blizzard and avalanche capital of Antarctica, with close to three dozen avalanches occurring each year and an average of 13 blizzards per year. Every time a blizzard or avalanche struck near Blizzardville, Keith would run around the house, screaming his poor little head off, even if said blizzard/avalanche posed a small threat to the town's safety.
Not only was Keith hysterical, he was extremely suspicious of strangers and hid every time someone visited the house. His only comforters were his parents, to which he looked up to very much. Keith was also dyslexic and had a hard time making good grades in school, which lead to his being teased and bullied frequently, much like Koobly Khan.
The only subject he was good at was Art, and the teachers found that what skills Keith lacked in the other subjects, he made up for in art. Keith always got top grades in the subject without even making much of an effort. In addition, his xenophobia had decreased over time, and Keith began helping other students with their art assignments whenever they asked. In return, the other students helped him with his non-art assignments, and soon Keith had finally gotten friends of his own.
After graduating from high school, Keith continued to excel at Art, and soon entered a state-wide art competition. At this time, the Bureau of Fiction was looking for an Illustrator, and Mayor McFlapp, who was in charge of recruiting, decided to attend the awards ceremony Of course, Keith won 1st place with an abstract painting that coincidentally looked like the Bureau of Fiction's facility, and Mayor McFlapp, intrigued, decided to look up his pedigree in the Bureau's archives. When the results came back, McFlapp found, to his delight, that Keith was homozygous in the recessive 4th-wall-breaking allele, which meant he qualified for the job. (Keith's ability to break the fourth wall had earlier been mistaken for a symptom of his mental instability.)
Keith happily accepted the office, recognizing Mayor McFlapp's voice as the one he had always heard narrating everything that happened, and took to the job like a fish to water. He quickly made friends with DJ X, a veteran Master, and continues to draw dazzling pictures of everything in Antarctica to this day.
Keith's job as Master Illustrator is to draw the appearances of any and all entities that are created into existence in the universe. He can also change their appearance at any time, temporarily. Keith also owns Pixel Studios, Inc., a private company that functions as the Bureau of Fiction's Department of Art and Images, and whose employees are all 4th-wall breakers.
Keith is good friends with Explorer, and has helped him on many of his adventures or shenanigans. Keith is also great friends with DJ X, who has mentored him a lot. Keith's xenophobia still exists to a small extent, so he tends to mistrust everyone besides his friends. He has also retained his hysteria, and sometimes even goes into a sort of "Phreaker Mode" (see here for more information) when in extreme panic.
- (while drawing) Th-there is nobody watching me, nobody watching me................. *looks around rapidly*
- AAAAAHH! PEANUT BUTTER!
- I'M NOT CRAZY, YOU ARE!
- EEK, GET AWAY FROM ME!
- GAH! DINGBATS, THEY'RE ALL OVER ME! (shrieks and runs away)
- ...just... keep... drawing... maybe it will go away...
- You're giving me a promotion? I'm... scared of promotions... the responsibility... it messes with your head.....
- Is -- is that a... security camera? *trembles* I -- I don't like security cameras, it's like I'm being... *gulps* .....watched..... *mumbles incoherently*
- Well, cover me in wax and call me a crayon!
- I'm being watched. You're being watched. We're all being watched.
Keith is drawing when a knock is heard at his office door.
Keith: EEK! SOMEONE'S COMING! MUST... HIDE!
The visitor opens the door. It's Mayor McFlapp. He walks in and sees Keith standing on an end-table, wearing a lamp shade.
Mayor McFlapp (playing along): Oh, dear, oh dear! Where has Keith bloomin' gone!
McFlapp turns to the Keith lamp and pulls its little chain.
Mayor McFlapp: That's strange... no bally light, wot....
The Mayor pulls the string again.
McFlapp (giving up the rouse): All right, Keith, we all know you're under that flippin' lampshade, wot!
Keith: YOU'RE A LAMPSHADE!
Keith throws the lampshade on Mayor McFlapp's head and runs out of the office in panic.
Mayor McFlapp (with lampshade on): O_O
(after hearing about the Great Darktonian Pie War)
Keith: AAAAAAHHH!!!! IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD, I TELL YOU, THE END OF THE WORLD!!!! WE'RE DOOMED, DOOMED!!!!!! (screams hysterically and runs around the Bureau, knocking stuff over)
Keith: Ahhhhh..... pie war...... every little thing..... doomed....... all right.... *falls alseep and hits the floor*
DJ X (to the audience): That always does the job, dawg.
- He has a pet Focci named Harold, who is very tame.
- Numerous penguins find Keith's theme song catchy, while Explorer claims the song is from some insurance company called "Guy-co".
- His favorite hobby, other than art, is computer programming.
- Ironically, his last name, Aristhye, is an anagram of hysteria.
- For some reason, he always wears his pajamas to work. No one really knows why because he's too scared to tell.
- The only way to stop him from freaking out is to play calming or happy music, especially reggae music. This usually causes Keith to fall asleep.
- Keith is not only mentally unstable, he is also a synesthete. Keith has sound-color synesthesia, which means he sees blobs of color whenever he hears sounds, especially music. This has helped him in his painting career. A LOT.
- He is actually Penguin Micro's cousin. Apparently, hysteria and the ability to break the Fourth Wall runs in the Aristhye family. Penguin Micro is now afraid of his cousin because he views the Fourth Wall as a doomsday device.
- He has several fears. Here is a list:
- Panophobia -- constantly being afraid/being afraid of everything (this is rather obvious)
- Astraphobia -- fear of thunder or lightning
- Claustrophobia -- fear of confined spaces. This is why Keith never uses the Charles' Key entrance to the Bureau of Fiction.
- Coulrophobia -- fear of clowns.
- Mysophobia -- fear of germs and/or contamination
- Nyctophobia -- fear of the dark
- Phasmophobia -- fear of ghosts or phantoms
- Pyrophobia -- fear of fire
- Scopophobia -- fear of being watched
- Xenophobia -- fear of strangers/the unknown. Keith's xenophobia has gone down over time, so he isn't that xenophobic anymore.
- Arachibutyrophobia -- fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of the mouth. Keith prefers grilled cheese sandwiches instead.
- Dystychiphobia -- fear of accidents.
- Omphalophobia -- fear of belly buttons.
- Scelerophobia -- fear of burglers.
- Elurophobia -- fear of cats.
- Coprastasophobia -- fear of getting constipated.
- Kakorrhaphiophobia -- fear of defeat.
- Counterphobia -- fear of being in fearful situations.
- Poinephobia -- fear of punishment.
- Pupaphobia -- fear of puppets.
- Xanthopuffleiphobia -- fear of yellow puffles.
- Fuddiwisoopuffleiphobia -- fear of orange puffles.
- He is good friends with Demonstrator Jack.
- Bureau of Fiction
- Mayor McFlapp
- DJ X
- Robert McPersonstein
- Bureau of Entropy
- Illustrator Rob
- Fudd Lapooh