Malor Vakovlev

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Malor Vakovlev
Born December 12, 1961 (1961-12-12) (age 57)
Air Kingdom, Olde Antarctica
Modern-day East Pengolia
Residence Shops Island
Gender Male
Nationality Ruscan, East Pengolian
Ethnicity Khanz Penguin
Citizenship Shopper
Notable works Wanting to nuke the life outta Yow
Height 3' 2"
Weight 49 lbs
Military service
Allegiance ShopsIslandFlag2013.png Shops Island
Service/branch SIA, WAB
Years of service 2013-present
Rank Chief of Strategic Missiles
Commands Fort Celatum
Battles/wars The Great Yowien War
The Puffalia Conflict
Great Snowzerland War VI
Fall of Nexon
Frosian War

Malor Vakovlev is a trigger-happy missile freak. He works for the SIA, as chief of strategic missiles. After The Great Yowien War, his lust for nuking enemy countries dropped somewhat. Vakovlev is also in charge of Fort Celatum, and subsequently the high-security prison, Level X. He earns 100 WB$ an hour, and has a net worth estimated at half a million WB$.


Malor was born in the barren landscape of East Pengolia. He was raised there as a chick before moving to Rusca a few years later when his father got a job. From there, he got a great education. He was always interested in the idea of warfare, especially bombs. As a young adult, he got a job for the NRR where he learned lots about the trade. He continued to work there until 2012 when he got laid off. Once he heard of Shops' military expansion, along with its rivalry of Yow and (formerly) Snowzerland, he moved there and signed up for the military as a scientist. Warning von Brown quickly noticed his talent and promoted him to the position of the chief of strategic missiles. He got his fill of nuking countries during the Great Yowien War. During the Great Snowzerland War VI, Vakovlev became a key figure in warding off enemy missile attacks and also provided missile technology for the Allies. He also served as a commander during the Fall of Nexon alongside his friend General Broseph. He had taken a leave of sickness starting in mid-October 2013 which transitioned into a severe condition, which stayed all the way into April 2014. When he had recovered, he helped the Shopper war effort against the Puffalians in the Frosian War.


Malor is known as a trigger-happy missile freak. He has urges to completely wipe some nations right off the map. He tends to drink lots of vodka, and always carries around a fish. He has a whole stock of them. He says he can either eat the fish, or use it to slap others; it depends on his mood. He often chooses the slapping method.


While working for the SIA, Malor's job is to make sure all missiles are in perfect working order, and that they will all fire on cue when needed. He is always anxious for the time to launch missiles, and is said to carry a launching remote with him wherever he goes.

Vakovlev was hired by the Shoppers in 2013 at a time where Shops Island still had nuclear missiles, and at a time in which missiles were the primary method of delivering mass-destruction to the enemy. With the exception of the Great Yowien War, the Shoppers have since largely abandoned the use of missiles for attacking and prefer to drop their weapons of mass-destruction via aircraft to save money. While Malor is still chief of strategic missiles, his job has gotten much less hectic and he now has very little to do.


  • Due to his Pengolian heritage, quite a few citizens consider him to be a former communist spy.
  • He is the Shopper ambassador to Rusca.

See Also[edit]