Penguin Aerodynamics and Space Agency
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|Penguin Aerodynamics and Space Agency|
The commonly-used "meatball" logo of PASA.
The mascot of PASA, the mythical Phoenix.
|Level||To infinity and beyond!|
PASA started way back in late 2006 when G wrote to the USA government about the possibility of a penguin space agency. The government wrote back saying that Brendan Stars would fund it and it would be built on Gentoo Island. With permission from the local Gentoo Penguin colony, they began building the Mission Base and Shuttle Launch pad near the coast, which has now become a major air force base, (USA Air Force Base Gentoo Island)
Meanwhile, a team of skilled engineers from Dorkugal began designing the Space Shuttle fleet. Celsius was made first, and rumors spread that the PASA was going to send a penguin to the moon. Brendan Stars denied these rumors, saying there was still heaps of stuff left to do before they could even start planning a mission. Construction continued, funded by Brendan and the Government.
In late 2007, work on the mission base was completed. The total cost was 9.7 million coins. As a test, the scientists at the base decided to launch a satellite into space. After rigourous testing, the telecommunications satellite RCKHPR-44 was launched on December 3rd, 2007. There was much rejoicing, as most of the engineers had no idea how it was going to work in space. Construction on the shuttle fleet continued.
Around March 2008 the mission planners, fueled by their success on the satellite, launched two other satellites, one for mapping (Mapping Satellite X22) and one for seeing into the farthest reaches of space (Orbiting Deep-Space Telescope). They launched well and the PASA planners became ecstatic. They became hasty, and did not use the care they used for the satellite missions. Something was going to go wrong, and it did.
On March 30th, 2008, a willing Gentoo Penguin volunteer was launched into space using a disposable space capsule. The launch went well, but on reentry the capsule was hit by a Deletion Missile. This was due to some careless planning by the PASA Mission Control, who had not acknowledged the Lichenblossom Isles Deletion Missile Test, which was on that day. The missiles were to land in the ocean and delete some buoys on the spot. Mission Control was discouraged, and the space program was suspended. The words "Discipline and Competent" became the motto of Mission Control. They learned their lesson.
The news of the crash spread over Antarctica, and distrust was directed to the program. Billybob was outraged, for some reason. The space program was close to being shut down. The government said that if they didn't do a successful mission before June, they would be shut down permanently. Nobody wanted to do the missions. However, help came in the form of Kwiksilver, an adventurous young penguin of no fixed abode.
Kwiksilver went through quick training and didn't learn enough neccesary for shuttle missions, but he learned enough to be able to fly the capsule. On May 28th, 2008, Kwiksilver became the first living penguin in space. The launch was a little shaky, but the rest of the mission went well. Newspapers the next day heralded "PASA RISES FROM THE ASHES" and so the mascot of PASA became the Phoenix, a mythical bird that dies in flame then rises from the ashes as a new bird.
PASA once again became the thirving agency it once was. Two more satellites, NERD-22 (Dorkugal telecommunications) and Telecom-X (icePhone satellite), were launched successfully.
On New Year's Day 2010, KingH10 joined because he liked exploring space and the effects of weightlessness. He learned how to fly the shuttle very quickly and he set off on his first mission. After that, he became the international representative. After the mission he said he would be going to the Moon alongside Kwiksilver. After that, he will leave to start his own space agency, The ESA (Emperorlands Space Agency).
On January 15th, 2010, after iConnect's Operation Space Grabber's completion, a space lander and satellite were launched. Enigma, the space lander, is headed towards Neptune and Uranus, while Stalactite, the satellite is orbiting around the earth, picking up Antarctic transmissions. This marks the completion of the first space project executed by a civilian company in Antarctic history.
On August 26th, 2010, Chub 777 signed up to join the agency. Even before, he was a spacecraft and aircraft enthusiast. He learned the controls of the shuttle quickly and was assigned to a mission. Then, on November 5, 2010, he was launched aboard Celsius to conduct experiments and observations. Chub became the secretary of aircraft research and continues to work at PASA as an astronaut and planning experiments on aircraft.
- Main article: PASA Shuttle Fleet
- Migrator (named after Rockhopper's ship)
- Heatblast (was destroyed in mid 2008)
- New Moon
- Main article: PASA Attack Fleet
- ODST (Orbiting Deep-Space Telescope) (launched December 8, 2003)
- Telecom-X (launched November 17, 2004)
- NERD-22 (launched July 17, 2005)
- TV-COM (launched August 1, 2005)
- Mapping Satellite X22 (launched September 9, 2005)
- RETT G-99 (launched January 1, 2006)
- RCKHPR-44 (launched June 19, 2006)
- Stalactite (launched January 15, 2010)
Space Probes and Landers
- Frontier (launched October 17, 2005) Status: Now near asteroid belt, to continue on into gas planets.
- Helios (launched November 7, 2005) Status: Now orbiting Earth-Sun L1 point
- Orion (launched January 2, 2006) Status: heading for Neptune, pending Saturn flyby
- Luna (launched February 14, 2006) Status: Landed on moon February 17, 2006, launched rover
- Nebula (launched March 18, 2007) Status: Now exploring asteroid belt
- Stardust (launched July 27, 2007) Status: Now exploring Comet Halley
- Discovery (launched January 6, 2008) Status: Now travelling to Outer Koopa Belt objects, pending insertion into temporary Jovian orbit
- Polaris (launched August 4,2008) Status: Exploring inner planets, pending Venus flyby
- Gemini (launched July 5,2009) Status: Landed on Mars on August 17, 2009, now exploring North Pole and to continue on to northern valleys
- Explorer 1 (launched September 6, 2009) Status: traveling to Jupiter, pending second Earth flyby
- Enigma (launched January 15, 2010) Status: traveling mainly to Neptune and Uranus for photographs and gas analysis, pending second Saturn flyby
- PAF-15S/MTD Objective: Testing high speed flying with thrust vectoring and high altitude maneuvering, as well as top-down flying. Will be produced for the Frosian Warriors Air Force if reviewed safe and useful.
- Shuttle Carrier Objective: Carrying shuttle from either emergency landing areas, or any other places, is a specially designed Snowing 747-200 aircraft, and is under the call sign PASA1000.
- PEA-44X MANTA Objective: To research feasibility of full yaw, pitch and roll control without tailplanes (horizontal or vertical). Also testing the newer style delta wing design.
- President: Brendan Stars
- Secretary: Happyface
- Board Members: Explorer 767, Fred 676, Melvin Turtleheimer, Guymed, Dan Beronews
- Astronauts: Kwiksilver, KingH10, Chub 777
- Secretary of Space Probe Exploration Program: Sancho Monte Captio
- Secretary of Manned Space Exploration Program:
- Secretary of Mission Control Operations:
- Secretary of Science Research Operations :
- Secretary of Space Shuttle Program:
- Secretary of Space Science Studies and Operations
- Secretary of Satellite Programs:
- Secretary of Aircraft Research : Chub 777
- Secretary of Facility and Aircraft Maintenance :
- International Representative: KingH10
The Crash of Heatblast
On July 22, 2008, the PASA shuttle Heatblast blew up while it was a few miles in the air, a few minutes after the shuttle was cleared for a take-off at Launch Complex 23-A on Pad J-1. The waffle-shaped paddings holding the solid rocket boosters' jettisoning mechanism together were not present at launch, and when the boosters were released, one of them struck the fuel tank at an extreme angle, causing it to blow up. A few minutes later, the debris was found near Rockhopper Island and was collected for analysis at the PASA Research Base at Gentoo Island. All passengers were evacuated and landed near Rockhopper Island.
- Official telemtery tapes:
- Captain: Have Stabilizers been adjusted?
- Pilot: Check.
- Captain: Have all boosters been set to 50.23 percent?
- Pilot: Doing that right now, Commander, get boosters set to 50.23.
- Commander: Getting boosters set at 50.23..
- Captain: Mission Control, all systems go, ready for lift-off.
- Mission Control: Heatblast, set for blast-off at 2300, when ready, ignire Solid Rocket Boosters, this is Mission Control, contact now.
- Commander: Igniting Solid Rocket Boosters now, clear for blast off, Pad J-1.
- Captain: Pilot, set engines at 78 percent when we have reached 4,500,000 ft.
- Pilot: Okay, setting engines to 78 percent...
- Captain :Release all Solid Rocket Boosters, now..
- Flight Engineer: Releasing all Rocket boosters, now
- Mission Control: Heatblast have you commenced Stage Zero? Please stand-by, start next stage at altitude of 21 miles.
- Commander: Mission Control, we have commenced stage zero.
- Commander: Captain check, Waffles now.
- Captain: Where are the Waffles?
- Pilot: I forgot them at the service tower....in the lavatory..
- Captain: YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENS WHEN WE FORGET THE WAFF--
- The Ship Crashes here. END OF RECORDING.*
The incident discouraged young penguins from becoming astronauts, so shuttle missions have been suspended, prompting the creation of probes, satellites and landers. See Below.
Key: SM means Shuttle Misson. TM means Test Mission.
- TM1: 17/01/08 Sent Kwiksilver into space and back.
- TM2: 29/02/08 Sent icePhone satellite into space.
- SM1: 30/03/08 Farenheit Conducted antigravity experiments.
- SM2: 01/04/08 Migrator Joyride for Penghis Khan. Royal treasurer was NOT impressed.
- SM3: 20/04/08 Frozen Mission to rescue Penghis Khan and the MIGRATOR. Penghis khan slapped the controls with a wet fish. Royal treasurer was STILL NOT impressed.
- SM4: 09/05/08 CelsiusI Put satellite (NERD-22) into space for Dorkugal.
- SM5: 22/07/08 Heatblast Heatblast blows up. No casualties, thanks to a few oxygen tanks and parachutes.
- TM3: 16/02/09 New Moon Tested ground RC satellite dishes. The shuttle's launch, orbit, and re-entry were all guided by high-frequency infrared ground controllers. Note: This mission was unmanned.
- SM6: 02/03/09 Frozen Sent an armed satellite into space to destroy an "alien" satellite launched by an unknown and unauthorized space program. (The said satellites were interfering with the Antarctic Teleportation System's and icePhone Communication Netowrk's own satellites.) Note: This mission was unmanned. The shuttle was controlled by the ground RC dishes that were tested in Test Mission 3.
- MM: 03/03/09 Sent Explorer and Kwiksilver to the moon and back. See The Moon Mission
- SM7: 17/01/10 Sent KingH10 into space and back in Lightning.
- SM8: 5/11/10 Sent Chub 777 into space to conduct experiments and space observations in Celsius.
- PASA is a parody of NASA, the USA's primary space administration.
- There was much controversy about the new name of the replacement shuttle for Heatblast, with people suggesting names like, golden fish, and [email protected]!!!1!!, but eventually New Moon was chosen.
- There were rumors PASA was going to send a penguin to the moon, which was confirmed upon announcement of The Moon Mission
- There were additional rumors that they were going to send a penguin to Mars. That was confirmed as well...
- PASA were originally going to have a funny looking rabbit character in space with a fish bowl style helmet on his head as there mascot but the boss at the time vetoed it so it was changed to it's present day one. After that this rabbit named Oz was sent to the void but he was rescued, brought to life, and later used in cartoons.
- Oz did return to PASA after his life in cartoons and he is still working there. He hopes to one day go to space.
Discovery of Aliens
- Rumors claim that an alien race have contacted PASA, claiming they are "not legally entitled to launch rockets".
- They also received this suspicious memo:
Dear Staff of the Penguin Aerodynamics and Space Agency:
- They also received this suspicious memo:
- It has come to our attention that you have been launching rockets and other means of escape-velocity propulsion near 71°22'21.26"S latitude and 27°47'38.62"W longitude. Considering that your board has not been registered on the list of nations known to launch rockets, nor has it the permission to launch commercial satellites into orbit around the earth, we demand that you cease your use of space travel until you can apply and be made known to the United States government, as well as the UnitedTerra for permission to utilize spacecraft for the benefit of mankind.
- We commend you for taking steps to understand the world we live in, and urgently wait for a reply. We have received data and have learned that you have an unauthorized telecommunications satellite in geostationary orbit over the Antarctic continent. As the space community and your corporation should know, the Antarctic continent is off limits to all human exploration and utilization of its resources, as designated by the Antarctic Preservation Treaty of 1913, and if you continue to launch your rockets from said location, we can and will deactivate any and all future launches.
- We have also detected strong radio waves near and throughout this continent, and we advise you to cease use of Antarctica immediately.
- All humans are banned from Antarctica, to preserve the primitive yet incredible creatures that live there, and we demand you stop messing with the environmental climate.
- Rocket propulsion exhaust could damage the poor animals there, and as we all know, the Antarctic creatures are not intelligent enough to cope with ice caps melting and other direct effects of man-induced pollution.
- Should this reply not be answered in three months' time, we shall reply again.
- --Christopher Scolese, Associate Administrator of the United States National Aeronautics and Space Administration
- After PASA shot down the "alien" satellite, they received another memo from the aliens, this time in a diplomacy demand.
Dear Penguin Aerodynamics and Space Agency:
- We have also noted that you are not on our list of space-faring countries, and wish to see your benefits to mankind.
- Our nation is already under enough problems, and the last thing the planet needs is the militarization of space.
- Please remember that outer space if solely for the benefit and enhancement of mankind, and is not a place to wage conflict of any kind, much less another arms race.
- The delegate is due by March 5th, 2009. We expect him or her soon.
- Keep space peaceful for all nations.
...heh heh... they met alright.
Bonjour, donc les "Gens" appelés de l'Antarctique. Je suis Jean-Jacques Dordain, le président de L'Agence Spatiale européenne. Voir comme nos partenaires, l'Aereonautics National et l'Administration Spatiale a arrangé des communications avec vous, nous de l'ESA aimerait à aussi.
S'il vous plaît répondre, les Bons gens d'Antarctique.
--Jean-Jacques Dordain, et L'Agence Spatiale européenne.
Translation:Hello, so called "People" of the Antarctic. I am Jean-Jacques Dordain, chairman of The European Space Agency. Seeing as our partners, the National Aeronautics and Space Administration have arranged communications with you, we of the ESA would like to as well.
Please respond, Good people of Antarctica.
--Jean-Jacques Dordain, and The European Space Agency.