Phone of the Elite and Privileged Few

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EPF Phone
Dang overfunding!
Type Overfunded ritzy Spy Phone interface.
Effects Performing the functions of Spy Phone and looking good doing it.
Source Classified
Location Top secret
Cost to buy Given by EPF
Cost to sell Unsellable

The Phone of the Elite and Privileged Few, or the Phone of the EPF or EPF Phone is the freaking epic replacement of the PSA's Spy Phone. First created by G six months before the dissolution of the PSA, this sleek touch-screen device now serves the purpose of the original Spy Phone, but in a much more awesome way.


G, inspired by Peach's IcePhone and the competition, realized that he wasn't "in" on today's technology. What self-respecting adolescent would be caught dead with a phone using a KEYPAD and a CLAMSHELL FLIP METHOD? That's so 2004!

TOUCH SCREENS are in, baby! Or, at least this was G's hypothesis (which was correct).

G got to work on this deluxe item post-haste, giving it a fancy interface with deluxe sliding animations and ritzy buttons, no expense spared!

However, the phone was deemed an unnecessary novelty, so agents stuck with the good old Spy Phone. Funding for the PSA was sliced as the island finally fell into a sense of peace. That was, of course, until Herbert inflitrated, exposed, and ultimately annialated the structural integrity of the Sports Shop, wiping out the Headquarters of the PSA and every file not on G's backup servers.

A state of emergency was, in secret, declared, and the former PSA recieved a huge funding boost to compensate for loss and absorption. G used these excessive funds to build an overly dramatic and fancy new headquarters, complete with long-distance teleporter, two security cameras, and that cool elevator he always wanted!

Also, thanks to the spending excess, G's new fancy phone was distributed to all new EPF agents, much to their delight, and to the disappointment of the old agents and Cream Sodas alike. It was unnecessary government spending, but it sure looked cool!

Reception and criticism[edit]

Most tech-savvy agents praise the EPF Phone for it's use of the most recent technology. However, many former PSA agents dislike this phone, because it is "too complicated", and also because there is no tool compartment for the wrench, scissors and comb that were included on the original Spy Phone.


  • Gary gave the phone its name via a backronym format. EPF was switched around to make Elite Privileged Few, to describe the phone.
  • The phone is heavily based off of Peach's IcePhone.
  • G is considering declassifying and open-sourcing Spy Phones.

See also[edit]