Shopper Intelligence Agency

From Club Penguin Fanon Wiki
Jump to: navigation, search
We do it better.
Shopper Intelligence Agency
The official badge of the SIA.
The official logo of the SIA.
Agency overview
Formed April 2012
Anthem SIA Military Theme
Jurisdiction Shops Island
Headquarters Somewhere underground in Southern Shops
Employees Classified
Annual budget Classified; Estimated at around 250 - 275 billion WB$
Agency executives LMGT, Director of the SIA
Warning von Brown, Deputy Director; Head Rocket Engineer
Baron von Broseef, Grand General of the Armed Forces
Child agencies SIA Army
SIA Navy
SIA Air Force
SIA Coast Guard
Weapons and Artillery Bureau
Chill Island Protection Force
SIA Space Command Fleet
Frosian Warriors
Key document  ?
It has one of the widest fields of research out of any agency in Antarctica.

The Shopper Intelligence Agency, or SIA for short, is Shops Island's main intelligence agency and the official military of Shops Island. As a fighting force, the SIA is Antarctica's third largest military; it is the largest navy, second largest air force, and third largest standing army in Antarctica.

It is also the island's official science, protection, security and intelligence agency. Their Commander-In-Chief (head) and founder is LMGT, who started the agency after all his donuts were robbed and he wanted to protect Shops Island for the better. The agency since evolved from a spy and intelligence agency into a sprawling network that permeated every level of Shopper establishment.

Their main field transitioned from security to military action and rocketry throughout 2013. The SIA is credited with building some of the largest operating vehicles in Antarctica. See SIA Space Command Fleet for a full list. They are also one of the best military innovators in Antarctica.


The agency was formed in March 2012 as a form of protection against Herbert P. Bear. In April, however, the agency targeted the security of the citizens of Shops Island. Eventually, in June 2012 they went into scientific research and rocketry.

Ever since then, their research and innovations have increased exponentially. They now create new rockets on a tri-weekly basis and they manufacture more military weapons 24 hours a day.

As of 2013, the SIA was confronted by the Shops Island government and asked to become their official military, as a cost-saving alternative to creating a whole new department. They accepted, and are now a large military.

In July 2013, the SIA got drawn into the Great Space Race of 2013. As this happened, the SIA Space Command Fleet was created, and many scientific innovations came out within the next few days, along with over 1,200,000 spacecraft due to the new cloning machines and space propulsion systems. Lots of money was funded for the project: 500 billion WB$. However, many of these "new" scientific advances had actually been in development for years, and were just introduced and successfully tested at the time the agency was founded.

Ever since the Fall of Nexon, Shops and the SIA have been focused on a major rearmament program. Funds have been taken from the SIA Space Command Fleet, and have been put towards more sensible technologies on Earth.

War Endeavors[edit]

The SIA, and in turn Shops Island, has involved itself in many war endeavors.

The Great Yowien War[edit]

See The Great Yowien War

The SIA used their technology before the war even erupted, creating new technology to help blockade the Yowien Sea. When the Yowiens sent a nuclear payload towards Shops, the SIA launched a nuclear missile from their Spatium Station to intercept it. Throughout the entire war, SIA technology proved itself as effective and efficient on the battlefield, time after time.

The Puffalia Conflict[edit]

See The Puffalia Conflict

During the short war between the Shoppers and the communists, SIA science took a backseat to superior Castillan naval technology. SIA tanks and aircraft were also used en-masse during the war.

Great Snowzerland War VI[edit]

See Great Snowzerland War VI

The SIA had developed the SIA Space Command Fleet in worries that an Antarctic conflict would erupt. Their new and advanced space fleet would serve them well when fighting against the Snoss and Zhouese. SIA technology was also used to provide aid to the Allies.

Fall of Nexon[edit]

See Fall of Nexon

The SIA worked on developing brand new espionage technology throughout most of the Nexonan war, for easy spying on their enemies. Amphibious tanks were also developed and deployed in the early stages of the war, giving Shops Island quite a few advantages in certain cases. When it was over, the SIA seized Nexonan military technology to investigate and apply to new innovations.

The Plague War[edit]

See The Plague War

During The Plague War, the SIA got to implement much of the new equipment that they had assembled prior to the war. They used machinery in sheer numbers as never seen before. These new technologies gave birth to the SIA's title of being a "Shopper War Machine".

Frosian War[edit]

See Frosian War

The SIA built many new military vehicles for use during the Frosian War to combat the threat of their enemies. Troop numbers and scientific innovation soared to an all-time high during the war, making the SIA one of the most important and innovative agencies in Antarctica.


Some time after the Liberation of Planet 1984 and the 2015 Economic Crisis, Director LMGT of the SIA made a proposal in the Common Legislature to officially split the military portion of the SIA into their own department, the Shopper Armed Forces. This was due to the distinct differences between the intelligence field and the military, and the major influence the military was having on the agency overall, which was supposed to be focused on research and gathering intelligence. The Legislature passed LMGT's proposal, and the SIA and the new Shops Armed Forces became independent entities in late 2015. A large portion of the SIA's budget and personnel were lost to the Armed Forces, but they could once again focus on their own tasks, protecting Shopper citizens and researching new things.

Fields of research/operations[edit]

Major Fields[edit]

  • Military - See more above.
  • Spaceflight - Their second most famous operation. The SIA has created the largest rockets Antarctica has ever seen. They have not made any firsts as of yet, but they plan to make a first space triumph eventually.

Minor Fields[edit]

  • Science - In the science field/sector, SIA scientists work on creating many types of air and spacecraft, along with a cure for the Nookularix Virus.
  • Protection/Search and Rescue - In the protection/security field of operations, special agents carry out orders to protect citizens and foreign politicians from any threats. Under this category also falls Search and Rescue, which is handled by the Coast Guard.
  • Intelligence/Espionage - This field is an off-branch of protection, in which the special agents aim to capture criminals and Shopper targets, as well as gain any information that could lead to disaster for the country, so it can be prevented. Many penguins operating in the espionage division work with the SIA Special Forces.
  • Law enforcement - Law enforcement is a small off-branch of protection, like Intelligence. Trained agents in this field are to enforce the law that a regular Shops Island police officer would when there's none around. They also patrol at major sporting events, speeches, or anything of that nature where police just don't cut it, or are too busy to protect themselves.


For more information, see the respective pages of the Army, Navy, Air Force, and Coast Guard.

The SIA serves as both a combative and defensive military. It has many elite squadrons, and covers a wide variety of strategic expertise. The military is commanded by Baron von Broseef, who is especially known for fighting with the 9001st Legion.

Shops Island's military is one of the best paid, and nourished in Antarctica. Soldiers' wages are exponentially high, which results in a lot of voluntary recruitment. Their military is designed to defend against enemy nations. In past months, however, military funding has began to plummet, and soldier numbers have been dropping.

Shops recently received a goat from a large group of nerds; compared to the other recipients of the machines, they're somewhat indifferent about it due to their immense military power.


A typical soldier.

Soldiers typically do not carry many weapons. Usually only a snowball pistol or a sub-machine gun, as most of the soldiers drive tanks or fly airplanes. They are trained rigorously, and have some of the best paying jobs in the country. They're fed hearty meals, and are worked out to become buff and muscular. They aren't allowed to have any kind of disease or any symptoms of high blood pressure, most specifically diabetes to join. The SIA is one of the many militaries in Antarctica to allow female penguins to enlist.

There are two types of typical soldier outfits: One of them wears a lavender-colored coat and an infrared tracker helmet. The other one wears grey armor which encases the body, with an infrared tracker built in.

Robot Soldiers (SIA Drones)[edit]

An SIA Drone.

In April 2013, Shops Island announced the construction of robotic soldiers, becoming the fourth nation to do so after Snowzerland, Amataria, and the Barbearer Islands. The robots follow a human-like design just as the Snoss War Bots do. Military officials state that this is because the human design results in more agility. With the development of robotic soldiers, enlistment for the military has greatly diminished by government request.

The robot soldiers run on two plutonium rods (beneath the green casings). The soldiers have armor plating that can withstand gunshots and grenades. Almost any part of the body has the power to be rebuilt twice. Shops made an astounding 1,000,000 of these, which would come at immense costs, and take lots of uranium and iron ore. Half of the robots were later recommissioned to the domestic workforce in May 2013. Each robot is equipped with two guns on either arm, and a laser blaster on the chest, with the ability to blast right through 20 penguins in full body armor. Over time, however, the laser blasters have become increasingly inefficient in an effort to cut costs. Also, as of November 2013, SIA Drones are no longer able to rebuild themselves after being struck down once, due to the sheer expense.

In early 2014, president Lavender ordered the shut down of all non-civilian SIA Drones until the time arose that they would be needed for anymore military service. This is regarded as the "final nail in the coffin" for the SIA Drones, as they were rarely ever used after that.



The special badge of the 9001st Legion.

SIA Soldiers are designated in numbers, and by their squadrons and/or legions. They are all given badges, changing depending on their squadron. Normal squadrons sport a badge with a gear emblem in the middle; while others get to customize them. The number of their squadron is engraved at the bottom of the badge. This serves as a special way of identifying soldiers, and giving them special designation from one another's groups.


A cutaway of the Shopper Camo design.

The SIA is famous for its "Shopper Camo", which consists of a pattern of Lavender, black, and blue paint to create a speckled pattern which decorates many Shopper military equipment. It is known throughout Antarctica as a clearly distinct sign of Shopper prowess, as it contrasts very much in comparison to the likes of the normal green livery as seen in most Asiapelago, Antarctica, and Ninja Archipelagoean armies.

The military stripe that Shopper commanders bear.

The purpose and sensibility of Shopper Camo rests in the old Khanzem-era concept of Dazzle. Dazzle is a special artistic pattern which impair the depth perception of enemies, therefore making vehicles with Shopper Camo slightly harder to accurately hit. This makes up for the lack of stealth in the colors of Shopper Camo.

Anthems and Folk Music[edit]

The SIA has many themes, aside from their main theme, for different parts of their military.


Main SIA Military Anthem

SIA Army Anthem

SIA Navy Anthem
SIA Air Force Anthem

Weapons of Mass Destruction[edit]

See Squarium for more information.

In 2012, Shops heavily bribed the USA into getting them to share their nuclear secrets. The SIA eventually was able to develop small nuclear weapons, which were first used against Snoss ICBM's in January of 2013. Ever since the military expansion, they grew to become more powerful and destructive. Shops has proven on many occasions that they are not afraid to have used their nuclear arsenal against enemy states, as proven on an Axis armada during the Great Yowien War.

In October 2013, the scientist Mito spearheaded a project which involved creating a new element, Squarium. It possessed extremely destructive properties, even to a greater extent than the uranium and plutonium bombs which had been used by Shops up until then. When the first Squarium bomb was detonated, it was evident that this new element was much more effective at wiping out opponents than nuclear warheads. Squarium's characteristic of not leaving any noticeable nuclear fallout was also appealing to generals, which meant that forces could invade the annihilated location immediately after being bombed.

In recent years, Shops Island has resolved to disable all of their nuclear weapons in favor of Squarium weapons instead. Since Squarium bombs have not been identified as nuclear weapons, Shops has been able to bypass the UAN's ban on creating weapons of mass destruction.

Military Bases[edit]

See List of Shopper Military Installments for more information.

Shops and in-turn the SIA, have numerous military bases spread all across Antarctica to ensure their dominance in their territories and the lands of their closest allies. These bases operate either army, navy, air force, or mixed purposes.

Military Record[edit]

Conflict Shops Island and Allies Opponents Result
Great Yowien War (May 15 - May 26, 2013) ShopsIslandFlag2013.png Shops Island
Snowzerland Flag.png Snowzerland
Flag of Castilla.png Castilla
FrancterreFlag.png Frankterre
Ruscoe Federation Flag.png Rusca
UK Flag 2.png Puffle'and
Culldromeislesflag.png Culldrome Isles
Yowien Empire flag.png Yow
East Pengolia image flag.png East Pengolia
Flag of Magic.png Glaw
Barbearer flag.png Barbearer Islands (Third party, did not fight with Yow and co.)
  • Yow defeated and destroyed
  • Glaw defeated and destroyed
  • Barbearer Islands defeated and destroyed
  • Yow partitioned
  • Frankterre seizes the rest of the Yowien Sea
  • Greater Shopper influence in Antarctica
The Puffalia Conflict (June 15 - June 23, 2013) ShopsIslandFlag2013.png Shops Island
Flag of Castilla.png Castilla (Weapons aid)
PuffaliaFlag.png Puffalia
East Pengolia image flag.png East Pengolia
  • Shopper victory
  • Puffalia is granted independence as a gesture of peace
  • Two of The Three Presidents are killed
Great Snowzerland War VI (July - October 2013)
(Asiapelago War)
ShopsIslandFlag2013.png Shops Island
USA flag.PNG United States of Antarctica
Flag of Castilla.png Castilla
FrancterreFlag.png Frankterre
Freezelandflag.jpg Freezeland
Bandera de Lisboagal.png Lisboagal
Ruscoe Federation Flag.png Rusca
Flag of the Seal Islands.svg Seal Islands
FlagROSn.png Snowiny
Liguria Flag.png Ligurian Resistance
Sato.png SATO (weaponry aid)
MAI.png Margate
Culldromeislesflag.png Culldrome Isles
Asaina flag.png Zhou
Snowzerland Flag.png Snowzerland
Flag of North Joseon.png North Joseon
Liguria Flag.png Liguria (Snoss controlled)
Darktan's Army
Nightmare's Army
Str00del Force
Imperial Forces
Imperial Empire
  • Snowzerland, Zhou and allies defeated
  • Snowzerland forced into seclusion from the Antarctic stage
  • Zhou becomes less belligerent
  • Frankterre regains international respect
  • USA badly damaged
Fall of Nexon (October 10 - November 3, 2013) ShopsIslandFlag2013.png Shops Island
FlagROSn.png Snowiny
Ed Island Flag.svg Ed Island (Government-in-exile)
NexonFlag.png Nexon Pyrrhic Victory
  • Nexon placed under Allied occupation
  • Nexonan military abolished
  • Temporary peace between Nexon and Shops Island
  • Shopper reparations to Nexon
  • Ed Island's autonomy reasserted
The Plague War (Nov 12, 2013 - Nov 23, 2013) ShopsIslandFlag2013.png Shops Island
NexonFlag.png Nexon (later sacked)
Sandila.png Sandila (Part of Snowiny, fought independently)
FlagROSn.png Snowiny
MelodeevesFlag.png Melodeeves
PuffaliaFlagNew.png Puffalia
PuffarusFlag.png Puffarus
  • Melodeeves destroyed
  • Melodeeves split between Shops Island and Snowiny
  • Shopper-Nexonan relations destroyed
  • Margate hands emperor Vince to Shops as a sign of friendship
Frosian War (February 15 - June 22, 2014) AxlePowers.png The Axle Powers
ShopsIslandFlag2013.png Shops Island
Culldromeislesflag.png Culldrome Isles
Munijochempire.png Munijoch
Ed Island Flag.svg Ed Island
USA flag.PNG United States of Antarctica
FlagEPF.png Elite Penguin Force
PolarisFlag.png Federal Republic of Polaris
Free Polarian Forces
MaLOLaysiaFlag.png Malesia
Freezelandflag.jpg Freezeland
Flag of the Seal Islands.svg Seal Islands
PuffaliaFlagNew.png Puffalia
PuffarusFlag.png Puffarus
Asaina flag.png Zhou
East Pengolia image flag.png East Pengolia
MJWBFlag.png Whiteblood Insurgents
MeilorPolaris.png Meilor Polaris
MelodeevesFlag.png Melodeevian Nationalists
NexonFlag.png Nexonan Nationalists
Yowien Empire flag.png Yowien Nationalists
BrohailianArmyFlag.png Brohailian Army
  • Puffalia destroyed
  • Puffarus destroyed
  • Puffalia and Puffarus put under Axle Powers' occupation
  • Freezeland badly damaged
  • USA badly damaged
  • Shops Island's territories badly damaged
  • New period of Shopper peace and influence in Antarctica
  • Shops Island and Zhou make peace
  • New military government in Munijoch installed
Liberation of Planet 1984 (April 10 - June 1, 2015) ShopsIslandFlag2013.png Shops Island
NotroneanLiberationMovement.png Notronean Liberation Movement
OrwelliaFlag.png Orwellia
VerpomiaFlag.png Verpomia
OuestlandFlag.png Ouestland

Shops Island has also provided military aid in the Battle of Culldrome, Shadow of Culldrome, Puffalian-Western War, and the Antarctic War on Terrorism.


The SIA is known for its science, though not as much as the military. Shops is one of the scientific leaders in the Asiapelago, in contrast to the dated regimes and practices of many other nations. The SIA has created many new technologies, such as espionage equipment, military equipment, new elements, vaccines, cures, and much more. Most of the SIA's scientific operations are led by the young scientist Mito.

Through all of its innovations, the SIA has also made some very controversial inventions. These include new weapons of mass destruction, missiles, SIA Drones, and more.

Most of the SIA's scientific operations and studies happen in secret bases in Southern Shops, away from curious and prying eyes. Many technologies that they have created remain secret from public and international knowledge for security reasons.


Warning von Brown, the SIA's leading rocket engineer.

The SIA's rocket program began in late 2010 under direct government control, though they were unable to ever create anything that could even be considered a rocket. For a long time, they experimented with solid fuel. When the SIA took over operations in April 2012, they began to experiment with kerosene, a liquid fuel. They also experimented with many other smaller rockets, the largest of which at the time were involved with Operation: Landmass and launching satellites.

In early 2013, an Alemanian rocket scientist named Warning von Brown and some of his engineering friends arrived on Shops Island and joined the SIA rocket program. With their help, the rocket program took off and created many large rockets.

The first large SIA rocket, the Trailblazer, was a formidable predecessor to the Shopscovery, which came into use soon after. Both were quite large in comparison to most other nations' rocket programs; the only nations with larger rockets were international superpowers. The Shopscovery was first brought to light when it was used to send Bro, Clovis and Jock Hochstadt into space to stop a Snoss ballistic missile.

Shops' rapid expansion throughout 2013 has been accredited to this event. With the help of new funds, the SIA soon created the Neptune IX rocket, which helped Shoppers establish their first permanent Moon base. Though rocket development was supposed to accelerate unbelievably, the SIA got caught up in expanding their military for quite a while, before getting re-oriented on their space program.

Clank, another active scientist for the SIA.

By May, the plans for two new rockets, the Laurifer and Infantem, were drawn out. These new rockets called for a new design and a new method of propulsion. By now, the SIA finally agreed to switch over to liquid hydrogen and liquid oxygen as their rocket fuels; the same propulsion that larger countries such as the USA had used for a long time. These two new spacecraft allowed Shops to establish their first Martian colonies.

However, Shops' space power began to fall into risk with the Great Space Race of 2013, a time when other nations began to develop lots of advanced technology, such as Snowzerland's TIE Fighter or Ed Island's space fleet. In response, Shops created the SIA Space Command Fleet, a branch which took over many studies which had been in the works for years.

The Space Command Fleet was given heavy funds to get off the ground. With lots of support, the agency helped create many new Shopper technologies, such as new propulsion methods based on superheating, access to Hyperspace, and much more. This gave them an advantage in the space race, and the subsequent GSWVI.

Ever since, the SIA's rocket program has been calmed down, as focus has been redirected to that of the military. The rocket program still runs strong today.

Law Enforcement/Protection[edit]

The Law Enforcement branch of the SIA largely acts independently from the rest of the agency. It has strong ties to the government of Shopper states and the federal government, just as much as it has ties to the SIA. Shopper police officers are generally known for being firm yet fair, although multiple reports of abuse surface every year. The conduct of Shopper police seems to change throughout the different states and territories.

SIA Law Enforcement is also responsible for the personal protection of Shopper politicians and foreign dignitaries. These specialized officers are among the best-equipped in Antarctica and work alongside the SIA Special Forces and SIA Espionage agents.


See SIA Special Forces for more information.


Notable members[edit]


See Also[edit]