Sleeping Penguins

This tale has been told! It's done!

Sleeping penguins is the tale of an undercover police officer in a newly arrived Zhou triad while dealing with the stress of risking being killed] and the guilt if he was forced to delete his police friends. Slowly, he uncovered a conspiracy that involves both his department and the triad. And with that, Wei becomes more corrupt. Will justice prevail? Or will Wei quit the police force and join the Triad.

Prologue

Our hero, Wei was in a deal with the UPM. They are dealing with tons of weapons and Judgies. The deal is going on great until some cars arrived.

Wei:"How did you guys afford to buy sport cars?"

UPM dealer:"That ain't no gang vehicles!! Police busted us, run before they could arrest us!!"

The gang member climbed a stair and ran on top of a building before leaping off to a lower building to lose the heat, Wei followed him. Eventually a helicopter appeared.

Police pilot:"Halt! Pete shoot them with ditto!"

Pete:"Yes sir."

Pete filled his sniper rifle with Ditto A and shot the UPM dealer. He fell onto the ground, frozen. Meanwhile, Wei put up a good fight against the local paramilitary police and the actual police. Then he saw his police friend, Jackie.

Wei:"Is this a setup?!"

Jackie:"No. It isn't a setup. Actually I am conf-"

Before he could finish, Wei hit his comrade with a nearby wooden broom before throwing it at Pete. Some officers arrived with batons, our hero beat them senseless with his fists. When Wei was about to grab a pistol he got shot by Pete and got arrested. When he unfroze in jail, he was greeted by Superintendent Thomas Penguin and Jackie. Seems like there's a new case...

Thomas:"Alright Wei, the gang you are representing in the Judgie deal actually is just a faction of a new Chinese Triad. Heard that they are evil. You wil be infiltrating the same faction again. We must get to the Dragon Head (Don or Boss to you Mafia fans)."

Wei:"And what is Jack doing here?"

Jackie:"I am also going undercover in the same faction as you. And why the heck did you knocked me out just now?!"

Wei:"If I continue the chit-chat with you I will be arrested and it's useless now since I am already in jail."

Thomas:"In your dreams!" 

Wei:"Oh yeah. The triad."

Wei then go back to the faction's HQ and saw the members playing cards and mahjong.

Sonny Wu:"Wei 你回来了！要不要玩麻将? (Wei you are back! Wanna join us for mahjong?)"

Wei:"No thanks. I'd rather do a job."

Sonny:"Ok then. Some vendors ain't paying me protection fees! DO THEY KNOW WHO AM I?! I want you to sort out the problem for me."

Wei:"Yes boss."

Chapter 1

Wei stole a civilian's car and head to South Pole City's Zhou town. Hanging out around the district since his teenage gave Wei the knowledge of the stalls, vendors, it's staff, the products and the exact position of the stalls. He took a walk around and saw a CD vendor. He walked to it.

Wei:Hello friend. Do you had any CDs for sale ? Vendor:What do you want ? There's music, Hong Kong TV series both old and present, western and eastern movies.  Wei:Do you have any crime drama film ? Vendor:Oh ye- WAIT A MINUTE !!!! YOU ARE A MEMBER OF THE CHINESE TRIAD !!

Luckily for Wei the vendor's stall is secluded in an alleyway. Wei took a pipe nearby and smash some of the CDs. The vendor reacted by trying to punch Wei. Wei dodged the blow and strike his legs.

Wei:Don't you know that I learn martial arts sucker ?!

Vendor:No. And please leave me alone. I will pay you $ 450 a month and your gang as well.

Wei took the vendor's cash and phoned Sonny.

Wei:Hello ? The vendor paid up the cash and this time he promised to pay twice the original amount. Is there anything else ?

Sonny:There's two more vendors. I got intel that the police is doing a raid on all the CD vendors since some of them sold pirated CDs. Even though the other two ain't selling CDs, the police won't be ok with our money earning "skills". They will be coming in an hour.

Wei heads to the next vendor's stall. 

Wei:HEY INSURANCE CAN SAVE YOUR MONEY OR LIFE ONE DAY FROM DELETION PUNK !

Unfortunately some rival gang members saw him.

Gang Member 1:Hey what are you doing kid ?!

Wei:Collecting insurance. 

Wei smacked gang member 1 onto the ground. Three gang members took out pocket knives and baseball bats. Wei disarmed the one with the knife and slashed the other two rival gangsters with it. A very tall penguin who's a leader in the rival gang parked his sport car near Wei and with him a machete and more thugs armed with knives.

Giant gangster:You won't escaped from this now ! 

Wei shoved the giant penguin against the wall which knocked him out and he took the machete. 2 of the thugs lunged at our protagonist in opposite directions. He slammed one of them onto the ground and counterattacked the other's kick. Wei stole the giant thug's car and drove away, crushing some of the thugs in the mayhem. He is going to the last vendor and he arrived minutes later.

Vendor:Be careful little boy. I packed heat.

The vendor took out a shotgun. However, he cooly snatched the gun and beat the vendor up with it.

Vendor:Ok I will pay. (gives $450 to Wei)

Wei:Thanks. Pay up next time. We Zhou needs to make a living.

Wei got back into his car and made the second vendor pay up the money. He calls Sonny Wu.

Wei:It's done boss. I collected $1350.

Sonny:Wow. Just wow. You must've beat them up with iron or something. You will be given 25% of it.

Wei:Thanks boss.

Chapter 2

After days of extortion and running odd jobs, Sonny took Wei & Jackie to an elegant restaurant. Important members of the Triad are there. It must be very important since Wei, Sonny and Jackie got picked up by a limo. When they arrived Wei and Jackie are shocked since the meeting revealed lots of intel.

Sonny:Wei, Jackie. Meet the Dragon Head, Uncle Ho.

Wei & Jackie bowed to the Uncle in respect.

Uncle Ho:Both of you looks like fine gentlemen. Wanna meet more elders ?

Wei:Sure.

Uncle Ho introduced the senior Triad members one by one.

Ho:At the door there is Mr. Tong. He is the most feared Triad enforcer ever known. Skilled in assassination and torture. The guy drinking that strong bottle of Cream Soda is Smiling Lee. Runs the Judgies trade. At the other half of the room, we have Winston Chu, another Red Pole and more enforcers and bodyguards too unimportant to meet.

Wei:Wow.

After the meeting Sonny gave Wei and Jackie another job.

Sonny:I am taking over a casino. It's a barge floating on the dock but it had been given the front of being a cruise, so it will depart in 2 hours straight. If you succeed, both of you will be given each a 23% stake of ownership of the casino and you will be given some thugs to command. Alright, here's some SMG & pistols. Use them wisely. Bullets are limited you know since we ain't the Hochstadt Gang firing free rounds at Swiss Ninja's guards and Austin8310.

Wei:Duh we aren't even in a war.

Sonny:It's a gang war.

With that, the two undercover cops left. And arrived 20 minutes later at the dock.

Jackie:Which one is the right cruise ?

Wei:The one with the signboard:"FLOATY HOTEL SUPERCRUISE AND DEFINITELY NOT A CASINO OFFERING A GOOD GAMING EXPERIENCE EVEN THOUGH WE ARE SUPSPICIOUS BUT WE AREN'T". And would you look at that ? Guards arm- wait is that guy armed with military grade-guns ?! That gun is experimental !! You, me, Superintendent Tom and Turtleshroom saw the gun in development and it can fire poisonous darts, bullets, deletion laser, explosive grenades and incendiary laser which can burns a tank in 3 seconds.

Jackie:We will have to take him out first. I saw some UPM thugs hanging around in one of Bugzy's cool and PWNsome speedboat. And there's some of Papa Tremezzo's enforcers. Let's hire them.

Wei walked to them and offered them money in exchange for helping them kick the rival gang's butts outta the casino. After discussing the plan, a UPM soldat sniped and froze the guy with the experimental gun. Wei, Jackie and their army of thugs throw hooks at the cruise and zip lines their way to it. After deleting all the thugs on the ship, they proceed into the casino. They fired their guns at the guards and a gunfight erupted.

Wei:Well at least we ain't terrorists since there's no civilians in the casino and the ship.

Naturally, Bugzy always bless his thugs with PWNsomeness and naturally that makes the UPM always win fights so it's no doubt that the duo and their hired army won the fight. With all the rivals deleted, Wei ordered the thugs to collect the weapons of the enemy and give it to them (so he could sell it and gave some examples of what gang weapons will be used to the superintendent). Suddenly a large ship docked at the ship.

Jackie:Whats that ?

Wei:Only one way to find out (picks up the experimental weapon). Oh yeah there's more of those in that trunk over there. Pick one if you want. We will only give one back to the former dictator.

Wei and the thugs deleted all the crew of the boarding ship. They found Judgies, cream soda and weapons enough to be swimed in.

All thugs:0_O

Wei:Tremezzo thugs make the ship board the dock again. Me and your other boss are gonna think about these loads of things. UPM guards look out for hostiles in the form of police and enemy gangs.

The thugs nodded and went back to work. Wei and Jackie decided to sell them to the Triad. Wei immediately phoned the Triad leaders to meet in Uncle Ho's mansion (with his approval of course).

Sonny:Wow it's your 2nd month in the gang and you already arranged a meeting in the boss's mansion. You must be more PWNsome than the army to do that.

Wei:Nah. We are just lucky. Ok me and Jackie found lots of weapons, Judgies and cream soda in a boarding ship while we fight for a casino barge. I think they are worth up to $56 billion in USA alone.

Uncle Ho:Sell them. We will be rich enough to buy legitimate businesses and infiltrate the government themselves and finally we will be the next South Pole Council !

Winston Chu:I propose that we invest some of the cash in countries like UnitedTerra, Calada, our home country Zhou, Japaland and Liguria and let's send some high ranking members to Liguria to represent the parliament. I propose me, Mr. Tong, Wei  and Jackie.

Uncle Ho:So it's decided. Earn more money for the Triad brothers. Our ultimate goal is to control Antartica's economy ! MWA HA HA HA !!

Chapter 3

After months of doing businesses in Liguria, Wei came back to South Pole City. With the money, he bought a luxurious apartment and lots of sport cars. As Sonny promised, Wei and Jackie had their own men. They are now rich. And it's a wonderful time for Sonny as he's getting married to his girlfriend Penny. Wei and Uncle Ho were invited. 

Sonny:Good evening Uncle Ho and how do you do Wei ?

Wei:I am good. Congrats Sonny.

Sonny:Wei please do me a favor. Bring an expensive bottle of cream soda to celebrate my wedding will ya ?

Wei:Sure. 

Wei hurried to Sonny's car and took out the bottle of Cream Soda. Suddenly he heard gunshots so he dropped the bottle and went back to the wedding armed with a M16. He saw Sonny dying. 

Sonny:Come here boy. Protect my wife and Uncle Ho. I saw him shot.

With his last words Sonny died. Wei was sad but he had to find the two VIPs. He saw Uncle Ho and Sonny's wife. He picked them up and brought them to his car. Lots of rivals in scooters fired at Wei with grenade launchers and shotguns.

Rival 1:Now it's payback (fires a grenade at Wei's car).

Jackie appeared riding a scooter and got into Wei's car. Jackie helped him to drive the car while Wei shoot at the rivals. Filled with anger, Wei took out an unusual piece of weaponry-a M134 minigun man portable. In extreme anger, Wei fired shots at the rivals' incoming vehicles and not even flesh remained of their corpse. Jackie hurried to the hospital and the VIPs were saved.

Days later, Wei and Jackie were summoned to the police station. 

Superintendent Thomas:I heard the news of Uncle Ho in hospital, Sonny Wu dead and some enforcers dead. We are doing a raid. I had created a squad of soldiers. Meet Frank the leader, Officer John, Commander James and Agent X. You will be raiding Sonny Wu's villa, now a Triad HQ.

Wei was confused. Just then he got a call so he went out into a private place.

Wei:Who's this ?

Smiling Lee:Yo Wei. Since Sonny died you are now the leader of his gang. Hurry up for the initiation to Red Pole.

Wei:Sure.

Wei hurried to the initiation location and got initiated. He warned them of the police raid since he's corrupted by money, power and respect.

The police squad raided the place but Wei led them to the wrong room and Mr. Tong confronted Agent X. Agent X fired his pistol at Mr. Tong but he only got minor injuries.

Mr.Tong:The last confrontation against a police officer is brutal and fun for me.

With that words, Mr. Tong slit Agent X's throat and slashed Agent X with an elaborate Zhouese sword before firing at his corpse with an Uzi.

Mr.Tong:Done and done.

Meanwhile, Wei took out a shotgun and shot Commander James. 

Jackie:Why did you do that ?!

Wei:He's a rival gang member infiltrating the police force. (Wei lied)

Officer John:I found Agent X's corpse !

Frank:Looks like he's murdered by the legendary enforcer Liu Shen Tong.

Wei:Yeah definitely him.

Jackie:Yup.

Frank:Enough chit chat. Tell the low rank police officers to come.

Wei:Excuse me. (walks away)

Wei phoned Winston.

Wei:Yo Winston. Remember all about the police infiltrating one of our HQ ? They are sending reinforcement now. Tell your men to lead them into a trap.

Winston:Count on my 兄弟 (brother) !

Winston briefed to his men.

Winston:Alright the cops are coming. I want you guys to kill all of them.

Thugs:Yes boss.

One of them, a demolition expert, planted a bomb in two of the cops' cars when they aren't looking and detonated them. The shocked police rushed out with SMGs, shotguns and pistols. The Triad bought some war bots from Swiss Ninja and the bots shot the police with M249 and lots of machine guns. Most of them died.

Frank:Retreat !!!

Police:Yes sir.

When they try to get out of the situation, the Triad members fired shotguns at Frank's squad.

Wei:I will left myself as a bait. ( gets on scooter)

The bots chased Frank's squad while the Triad followed Wei's scooter. And he slowed down the speed of the scooter. The villains began to grin like Director Benny. No. They were worse than Director Benny for a few seconds before Ethel erupted into laughter (they can grin for an hour if Benny didn't disturb the story being written by suddenly dueling with Mayor McFlapp with a coat hanger for the 100th time this week). Lots of Traid members and thugs clapped and Winston & Mr.Tong appeared.

Mr.Tong:The cop boss called Frank is one stupid penguin.

Suddenly Smiling Lee appeared. He ain't happy.

Smiling Lee:Aw what ?! I missed the action the 4th time this month ?! Curse you Sky Controlling Puffle !!!

Wei:I am sure that "Ternville Mayor" will give you some more action. 

Wei:I will have to go to do some business. See you guys later.

He went to the hospital with guards.

Wei:How's Agent X ?

Frank:Dead. Did you shot him ?! 

Wei:No.

Frank:Of course, it's not you since you ordered Mr.Tong to kill him ! YOU BETRAYING TRIAD RED POLE SCUM !!

Jackie:WHAT ?! IT'S YOU ALL ALONG WEI ?!

Wei is corrupted and evil. He responded harshly:

Yeah. It's me and guess what ? The Triad is gonna do a raid at an EPF HQ, a gunfight at Terra Spy Union's HQ and we are going to vandalize the Council Hall.

Jackie:Yeah right. Like if you would try to burn a whole village.

Jackie later went back to his apartment. Despite being rich and all, Jackie was depressed that his best friend turned evil and felt remorse from flashbacks on him executing rival gang members in the casino barge ruthlessly months ago. He turned on the TV, grabbed some Cream Soda and fell asleep. Next day, he woke up in shock of hearing the news.

News:Hello watchers. This is Philip Stark reporting live from the South Pole Council Meeting Hall. The whole place had been vandalized with graffiti. We believed that whoever responsible for this is the mastermind of the total destruction of an EPF HQ & a Terra Spy Union's HQ got bombed as well. There's as many as 1,450 fatalities. However there's no fatalities of the Triad attackers.

Jackie needs to think of a way to redeem Wei but how ? He suddenly had an idea. Wei had a girlfriend and he would be depressed if she ever left him. Jackie turned on his laptop and put Wei's girlfriend available to date on a dating site.

Chapter 4

Wei was walking home after another job. He saw a familiar sight. HIS GIRLFRIEND MARCELINE IS WITH ANOTHER GUY AND HE SAW THEM KISSING. Angered, he walked to them. 

Wei:DO YOU KNOW WHO AM I AND WHO IS SHE ?!

Jerk:No ! And push off-

Wei slammed the Jerk onto the floor and beat him up nonstop with a machete

Wei:I AM A RED POLE OF THE ZHOUESE TRIAD AND I AM A MINISTER OF LIGURIA. I KNOW BUGZY PERSONALLY !

The jerk ran away in fear.

Marceline:What ?! You are a gangster ? And that guy is only a friend. Gah ! That's it. We are breaking up. 

She left and Wei was angry. He saw a random pedestrian and shot his head for the fun of it.

At home, Wei received a tape with the title:"SUPERMURDERER POISONS DRAGON HEAD BY WINSTON". He played the tape and the following things were shown.

Superintendent Thomas entered Uncle Ho's ward. He argued with him.

Tom:You are now useless old fool.

Uncle Ho:What about the promise we made years ago ?! I gave you lifetime pass to the casinos, 10% share of total Triad income and immunity from protection extortion in exchange for police immunity ! 

The evil superintendent didn't say a word and took out a syringe filled with some liquid.

Uncle Ho:Ditto ?

Tom:No. It's toxin taken out from pufferfish. DIE !!!

Thomas stabbed the Dragon Head's neck and switched off the life support, killing the old man.

Elsewhere, Wei was disgusted. And he received a message from Smiling Lee.

Dear penguin, I saw the tape of your boss killing the boss of the triad. And I am afraid that you may be one as well by the way on how you murdered all the secret agents. Conspiracy theorists said that Billybob the president, Judge Xavier and UnitedTerra President Ninjinian are corrupt. They are now my hostages. Meet me in my palace to get them "for great justice".

Wei felt guilty of turning evil and murdering his own comrades. He went to Jackie's house but he found Jack's remaining clothes. He must be deleted by the experimental weapon. He gathered Mr Tong and Winston Chu. This is one hell of a battle.

Chapter 5

Wei piloted a military helicopter and flew to Lee's mansion and he ordered Mr Tong & Winston to gather up men for the gunbattle.  

Wei:Alright ! YOU WANNA PLAY ROUGH ?! SAY HELLO TO MY LITTLE TOY !!!

With that Wei fired lots of deletion missiles at Lee's property. The henchmen either screamed and ran around before getting deleted or fired deletion laser at the helicopter (which is deletion proof) before getting deleted by missiles. After 40 minutes of deleting the property, Lee appeared in a tower made of glass. Wei can saw Lee's minigun wielding bodyguards next to him and the hostages behind them. Wei crashed the heli at the tower deleting the guards and leave Wei, Lee and the hostages alive. Wei used a machete against Lee and in the duel the ghost of Jackie appeared in fire ninja uniform. Jackie burned Lee, causing him to fall off the tower in the commotion. Wei is now a redeemed anti-hero. However the job isn't done yet.

Chapter 6

Mr.Tong reported that he saw Thomas going to a Governance church. Meanwhile Thomas wants to make a confession to a priest.

Thomas:I have to confess something. I murdered a penguin and made a deal with the Triad. I also burned a UPM hideout killing lots of thugs.

The priest took off an ID mask revealing Wei in the priest's robes. Two EPF agents handcuffed the corrupt superintendent. Wei had a chat with Thomas before he went to jail.

Thomas:Yeah I deserves this. And I had a 40 years sentence since I am a police superintendent. By the way I am bankrupt anyway for buying too much Cream Soda and Judgies.

Police Officer 1:Sir that added 30 more years into your sentence   and maybe you will be given corporal punishment personally by Turtleshroom.

Wei:Relax cadet. With the few from the millions of crimes he committed and confessed, he wont survive 5 months in prison since you owed 10 millions to Triad loan sharks, which you cancelled the debts by arresting them and on the amount of UPM thugs you burned  you will have to be beaten up three times a day at the least.

Then Wei drove off in his sport car, chasing some jerks.

Evil Ending (uncanon)

In an alternate timeline, Wei killed the hostages and Lee so he became the leaders of two countries and start world domination. He also made an alliance with Swiss Ninja to conquer the world. In an uncanon last scene, Wei wears a fancy crown with the Illuvat jewel in it (killed Triskelle), all the elemental amulets are combined into one big gem and installed into his head while sitting on a pure gold throne. Behind him are the skulls of all the heroes he met and deleted like the Hochstadt Gang and stuff like that. A big interactive universal map showed that Wei ruled the 70% of the known universe and he plans to betray Swiss Ninja by launching T.H.I.S. at the planet Swiss Ninja is staying at.