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Due the the recent discovery of a map that is purported to lead to the Three Fruits of Happiness, I therefore invite you to partake in the newly commissioned expedition that is going to travel to what the map dictates. You are one of the very few penguins asked to join because of your special talents and skills. Reply now; you will not receive another reminder of this privilege.
PS: This message will self-destruct in the 10 seconds remaining after you will have finished reading this letter.