The Absurd Mission/Chapter 8
Chapter Eight: The Watch[edit]
As Austin looked through his inventory, wondering where to go next, he looked over all the stuff he had recieved from the black market. Hmm. Most of this stuff was guns, a few grenades, one or two unique items.
For some reason, the watch kept drawing him back. He didn't know why, but there was something special about it.
It was a strange looking watch. It had a few buttons, a dial, and two small text screens. Austin was puzzled. Also, there was another green Khanz nearby. As soon as Austin looked at him, he dashed away.
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"What's this?"
He put it on. Then, he looked in the nearby window of the igloo, and heard an unearthly scream.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! ABSOLUTELY NOT! SEND OUT THE MIB! GET THE TIME SQUAD! GET ALL THE WORKERS IN THE TIME DIVISION! HE CAN'T HAVE THAT! CURSE HIM! I ZAPPED HIM WITH LIGHTNING, AND IF HE FIGURES OUT WHAT THAT DOES, IT COULD BE AN APOCALYPSE!
Austin plugged his ears, trying not to hear the screaming. Then it stopped. Wait. If he figured out what it did?
He grinned evilly. This could be the best weapon he ever had!
Then, a knife flew at his head! With a stroke of luck, he saw it glinting in the light and dodged. It cut through a couple of his feathers and made a small scratch. He looked up. On all sides, he was surrounded by black penguins in suits and moose heads.
The MIB.
Then, all in sync, the MIB raised their knives, and threw. The knives came whirling at him like hundreds of darts. Austin yelled and clicked the watch.
Suddenly, he dissapeared. Looking up, he found himself by the garbage bin where the other green Khanz was. Wait a second. He was over there in that clearing, going through his inventory!
He had... Time traveled.
Then, the past Austin looked at him. Quickly, he dashed away down the alley. Then, suddenly, he appeared out of nowhere in front of himself! Austin gasped and fell backward. Then, the future Austin disapeared again. THEN, Present Austin then heard a shriek from his past self. Apparently, the MIB had just attacked him. Suddenly, he thought for a second. Now he was future Austin. If he didn't time travel to stun his past self, what would happen?
He waited.
Suddenly, he felt a horrible jolt of memory as time gave a shudder and his memories of that event were being ripped away.
"Sir!" cried a panicked worker.
"He's created a paradox already! Quickly, send out a time agent dressed as him. That'll stop it!"
Instantly, a worker disapeared, shocked Austin, and got back.
"Okay, we resolved that paradox. WE MUST GET HIM before he causes too many problems." said the head worker.
Austin checked out the watch. He had figured it out! The first one was the date, and the second one was the location. Hmmm... Khanzem. He'd travel to the battle in the bunker and attack the singing HPs! Then, the Naughtzee would use the Massive Topping Bomb and... But that would change history. Snowzerland probably wouldn't have had a chance in Khanzem, and he might not even exist if he messed something up.
He sighed. No, not Khanzem. Snowman Empire? Nah, that was lame. HPC? No. It was ruled by High Penguins.
THE FUTURE. HE COULD SEE THE FUTURE.
The Future[edit]
He instantly notched the watch to 2020.
BZZZZAP
He ran up to the nearest penguin.
"Sir, can you show me a map of Antarctica?"
The blue penguin, who had futuristic glasses on looked at him strangely.
"Okay. You're a Khanz? Suprising. We don't see them very often."
He pulled out a map. The Happyface Land was gone. The Viking Empire was a small blotch, surrounded by Freezeland. Apparently, when Happyface died, Freezeland and
Snowzerland had a fight over it. Also, Flystonia was now Snoss, and a few other islands.
The blue penguin seemed happy.
"I'm glad Austin Devecter and Swiss Ninja signed a peace treaty recently. Apparently, they've gone for a policy of neutrality and won't battle the USA. UnitedTerra is angry though. They've declined."
Austin shook the blue penguin's hand, gave him a couple coins, and edged the watch to 2060.
BZZZZZZAP
He saw a few penguins walking around. Everything looked... Well, futuristic, obviously. There was so much technology... Khanz are probably a dying race now. Either that, or they've integrated.
He walked up to the nearest penguin.
"Can I have a map of the world?"
The penguin shrugged.
"Why don't you just use your Phone4000 to update on it?"
He glared at the penguin.
"Look, I don't have one. Just give me a map."
"You don't have a Phone4000? HEY GUYS, THIS GUY DOESN'T HAVE A PHONE4000! CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?"
Austin grabbed his phone.
Interesting. Snowzerland had remained about the same, minus half of the Happyface State. It was noted that USA and Snowzerland were trading partners now. Cool. UTR had declined even more. Interesting. Also, a flying car whizzed by. HE WANTED ONE.
"Say, who rules Snowzerland now, and who is alive in the Hochstadt Gang?"
"Well... Let's see... Swiss Ninja is...We're not sure. Austin8310 died a heroic death a while back. He's an advisor to the rulers of New Snowzerland now. A ghost. It's interesting. Griante is dead, Bellina is dead, Ninja Wrath... Well, nobody knows where he went. Clovis, Jock, Fisch, and Piper are all still around. S2 is an advisor to the King of new Snowzerland. Austin's descendant is ruling Snowzerland right now.
Austin had two severe shocks then. The first one:
"I DIED?!?"
Then an even worse shock, the second one.
"I GOT MARRIED?!?"
Austin was stunned.
He decided that he might try out the past a bit.
He clicked back to the date of his mission. Two weeks ahead, actually. He could see if he was victorious!
BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZAPPPPPPPPPPP
Austin hit the ground, landing badly. He had landed two weeks after he started his mission.
He searched around. If he was going to have a battle, he would use the undergroud. Quickly, he dashed to the mine. A board and pieces a gun flew out of the entrance. He ducked, than ran in. Inside, he saw Johnathan and Rex dueling with Gottfried and Jock simultaneously. He quickly looked around and found himself. He was battering Piper. YES! He then groaned as Piper telekinetically hit him across the floor.
Suddenly, his attention was completely diverted. A flipper tapped him on the back.
It was a younger black penguin with a red beanie and a banana blaster standing behind him.
"Hey, kid, what're you doing?"
He pointed the blaster at Austin's head.
"Time isn't to be messed with."
Austin quickly smacked the gun out of his hand with a quick smack.
"You're a time agent, eh? Well, tell Denny that I could care less about that."
The younger black penguin glared.
"I'm a sysop for the BoF."
Austin didn't care.
That is, until Kwiksilver pulled out another Banana Blaster and knocked him out in one perfect shot.
The Forest, A Week Past the Present[edit]
Austin woke up, stunned.
He looked at his arm for some strange reason. A watch flickered and dissapeared. Also, he desperately wanted to remember something.
But what? What did he want to remember? What did he... Forget?
What date was it?
He ran to the Snow Forts and up to the large clock.
He had SKIPPED A WEEK.
He had lost a WHOLE WEEK on his mission.
He had lost an important week, and now his time was down to TWO DAYS before backup came. He just had their location, which was OUTDATED! They could have left!
Quickly, he dashed to the RDA Recycling Center, hit in the code, identified himself, and leapt into the elevator. It sunk down into the RDA Base, and opened up on Floor one. Austin ran up to Tern004 and grabbed him by the neck.
Tern004 screeched. "WHAT DO YOU WANT?!? LOOK, IF MIND-READING BOTHERS YOU, JUST TELL ME! DON'T STRANGLE ME!"
"I NEED TO GET TO FLOOR 10. URGENTLY."
Tern004, shaking, identified himself and got out of the elevator.
Once the door opened and he got into Floor 10, he dashed to the computer and looked up the files.
Oh dear. Several of the Hochstadts had left. The only one around was Fisch, and they had a pinpoint on his igloo.
Suddenly, a master plan came to Austin, and he ran back to the elevator, whizzed back to the top floor, and ran out, victorious!
Now, he had to get Fisch. It might be a bit tricky. Fisch was slightly more resilient, being High Penguin and Immortal at the same time certainly would give you a bonus.
