User blog:Kwiksilver/Keys to the Kingdom parody

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Okay, recently I've been reading the Keys to the Kingdom series by Garth Nix. Basically, it's about a guy called Arthur Penhaligon who accidentally becomes the Rightful Heir to the domain of the House, another inifinite dimension full of immortal Denizens who watch and record happenings in the Secondary Realms, one of which is Earth. The House and the Secondary realms were created from a substance called Nothing by some being called the Architect. When the Architect disappeared, she left a Will stating that the Rightful Heir shall take over the positions of the seven Trustees of the will, Mister Monday, Grim Tuesday, Lady Wednesday, Sir Thursday, Lady Friday, Superior Saturday and Lord Sunday and the realms they command within the house. However, the seven Trustees didn't want to relinquish their powers, so they broke the Will into seven parts and hid them so they would never be fufilled. Each Trustee wields a Key, a type of magical wand. Arthur has to gain control of the seven Keys and find the seven parts of the Will so order can be restored within the House and the Secondary Realms, which have decayed due to the misdeeds of the trustees.

Here's my idea: In the old days of the Bureau of Fiction there was a team of seven High Sysops who dealt with matters of their days and acted like Directors, and were named accordingly.

  • Madam Monday: In charge of all the bills, payments, financial matters and paperwork within the Bureau of Fiction and the CP Fanon Universe.
  • Tradesman Tuesday: In charge of creating and delivering characters, items, and new articles to their respective places.
  • Waterlogged Wednesday: In charge of all matters relating to water or fluid of some kind.
  • Commander Thursday: Head of the Department of Conflict, also deals with matters of a warlike nature or fighting.
  • Doctor Friday: In charge of all medical matters.
  • Smart Saturday: Deals with technology, intelligence and maths.
  • Overlord Sunday: In charge of all the other High Sysops.

However, when Luce decided to replace them with the position of Director, and demote them to the position of a normal officeworker, they protested, and used the powers of their customised Pens (Keys) to stop Luce's edits from coming into effect. Luce could not do anything about them, as she had made their pens Undeletable, so she had to bear them. However, she decided to pick a normal officeworker to be the new director, an officeworker called Arthur Pretzeligon, and instructed him to take defeat each of the High Sysops and take their Pens, so that her edits would have effect. The pens and their forms are as follows, in order of days:

  • A golden ballpoint pen.
  • A glowing green wrench.
  • A pair of silver sunglasses.
  • A maroon deletion rifle.
  • A stehoscope made of pearls.
  • A long metal rod.
  • A small golden key.

Arthur defeats each High Sysop and takes posession of the keys, letting the position of Director happen. The keys are remade into the APPROVE and DECLINE buttons that reside on the Director's desk.

What do you think?

--Sir Kwiksilver of TARDIS-No second chances. I'm that sort of a man. 10:52, April 14, 2010 (UTC)

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