User:CK/What if Wars

The What if? Wars
Date Unknown Location Everywhere Result Varied

The What If? Wars were a series of war simulations done by Shops Island in 2015 and 2016, after The Broseph Leaks surfaced. Though Lavender isn't a conqueror like General Broseph, he wished to know the odds of Shops winning wars against other countries, and eventually expanded the project to find the odds of other countries fighting each other.

If anyone has any disputes about something written on this page; take it to the talk page and discuss it there. Don't start an edit war on this page.

RoJ vs DPRJ

If the Republic of Joseon waged war on the Democratic Penguins' Republic of Joseon, and neither side had any allies, simulations showed that they would gain ground at first, probably pushing the DPRJ back to their capital of Pyonchang. However, if the DPRJ reacted fast enough, they would have most of their army waiting to ambush the ROJ army once they arrive in Pyonchang. If the DPRJ was still too unorganized, they would fall back to Hambong. Once fully organized, the DPRJ army, with their superior numbers, would attack the ROJ head on, and eventually push them back to the border. At this point both sides would start drafting penguins to fight. If the DPRJ quickly defeated and pushed back the ROJ past the border, it would cause a snowball effect which could cause them to take all of Joseon Island and push the ROJ government to Genju Island. However, if the battle at the border is long and drawn out, the ROJ will probably gain the upper hand with better reinforcements of drafted penguins, eventually using that to win the war against the DPRJ. The estimated ratio of victory is 6:5 ROJ to DPRJ, nearly a tie.

Acadia vs Dorkugal

If Acadia were to wage war on Dorkugal and her territories, and neither side had any allies, simulations show that Acadia would first launch an attack on the "motherboard" (main islands; Pi and Phi). Seeing as Dorkugal itself has no standing military, capturing the islands would be quite easy once the nation's 10-ship galleon navy has surrendered or been destroyed. In the naval battle, the Dorkugese would probably defeat a few ships, since they have advanced tech and weapons such as deletion torpedoes, but eventually would be destroyed or overrun. If overrun, the crews would delete their own ships using the "Scuttle button" to prevent them from getting in Acadian hands. Towards the Ninja Archipelago, the other Dorkugese territories such as Sparka and Macradonia may launch an invasion or even capture the Acadian territories of Gilneas and Chinstrap, but would eventually be defeated as well.

The last Dorkugese stronghold would be the Lichenblossom Isles, the creator of deletion technology and the location of most of the Dorkugese Empire's 8,000-penguin army. Overrunning the main islands would be possible with Acadia's superior numbers, but it is estimated they'd take much heavier losses than Lichenblossom. The territory's last defense would be Razzamatazzastron Atoll, which is a large half-submerged bakery that also doubles as a fortress. The fortress in the caldera would most likely be surrounded by Acadian ships and assaulted. They would eventually overrun the fortress, but once again take heavy losses due to it's naturally defensive position, and the Lichenblossom resistance and deletion technology, giving them the ability to delete entire Acadian ships. If they run out of ammunition, the Lichenblossomese would use stale rolls and baguettes as projectiles. The estimated ratio of victory for Acadia is 9:1.

Lys vs Dorkugal

If Lys and Dorkugal went to war, with neither having allies, the situation would play out similarly to the Acadia vs Dorkugal situation. However, the main difference would be Lys' use of their dragons, to intimidate the Dorks, or even burn down the famed Googolplex. The estimated ratio of victory for Lys is 10:1.

Axle Powers vs Acadia

Due to the claims made by Acadia regarding their "dragons," Lavender decided for fun to see what happened. If Acadia decided to wage war against Axles, initial defense simulations show that they would be playing a heavy defense, most likely sacrificing dragons to combat nuclear weaponry from hitting the actual country. Culldrome Star Cruisers and MJ-680s would lead primary assaults in the close air range, most likely shooting non-nuclear missiles to direct attention to other locations, i.e civilian populations, etc. When the airspace cleared, it's hypothesized that by this time, Acadia would surrender, or continue fighting despite the dismal odds. Ed Island would most likely launch either an orbital strike, not caring about collateral damage, or direct fire toward the capital, opting to raze the land to discourage them to come back. The victory ratio is 6:1.

When modified for Shops to do the brunt of the work (because those darn lazy axles!), victory is still within grasp, but will take significantly longer. Ed Island may still provide the orbital strike, however the majority of the fighters (i.e, MJ-680's, etc), may not be there to do the work. Despite this, Shops pushes them back all the way to their last stronghold and opts for using a powerful nuclear device to end the war. Due to it taking longer, the ratio increased to 6:3.

USA and Axle Powers vs Snowzerland and Western Union

In a cataclysmic scenario, if the USA and Axle Powers waged war against Snowzerland and the Western Union, it's highly probable that the attacks will be split up to cover more ground. Proportionately, the combined USA and Axle Military outnumber the Snowzerland and Western Union's military by about 3 to 1. As a result, the Snoss and Western Union cannot play a major attack role and must cover their behinds and play defense instead. The first priority would be to get rid of the smaller threats within the Union, such as Acadia, Lys, Causeopolis and Amataria. Then, the bigger threats, such as United Provinces and Margate, would be dealt with by half of Ed Island's and Culldrome's military respectively. Finally, when those countries are defeated, the full force will be directed towards Snowzerland in a blitz for gaining land in the country.

Some diplomacy will be played, however, in this. For example, Munijoch may try to persuade Terra Federation to withdraw from the union and become a member of The Zeta Connections. Simulations show that Tropicalis would withdraw immediately as well.

Zeta Connections

Since Culldrome Isles, Munijoch, and Margate are all members of the Zeta Connections, initial diplomatic measures to prevent war between them was enacted days before the war. The members held meetings in which they agreed that the countries would not attack each other, but all bets were off pertaining to the other countries (i.e: Ed Island attacking Margate). In addition, those who did not wish to participate in the war were invited to join the alliance in an effort to prevent unnecessary destruction.

Acadia

Simulations show the same path of victory, except the USA may opt to simply use a deletion missile. If they do this, the odds are stacked immensely in their favor. However, if not, they'd have to fight back against Lys dragons, which was detailed in a previous simulation. Thanks to USA air support, the odds are increased to 7:1.

Lys

Much like Acadia, the Lys government holds an army of dragons at their disposal. They would play defensively with orders to shoot down any enemy craft that come near them. The USA, opting not to use a deletion missile due to the size, will most likely ask Ed Island to do an orbital kinetic strike on them. The results, while cataclysmic for the Peninsula, will effectively end the war on the Acadian-Lys front and most likely opt for a complete surrender.

If air support is not used, the USA's sheer numbers alone will coerce the city state into surrender, even if they withdraw to another island stronghold.

Due to the USA's size and Lys' size, odds are 8:2.

Amataria

Munijoch opted to fight this war for the Axles, seeing as Amataria is a close friend. Despite Amataria's staunch approach to the Axles in general, they were reluctant to fight, only fighting until Isaac Juggernaut ordered the launch of 100 PULSE Bombs, capable of vaporizing the country. They surrendered, and per terms with Munijoch's president, established a new government there with interests pertaining to Munijoch. Odds of victory are 6:3.

Caseusopolis

The Ed Island military simply used Thermobaric weapons to melt the cheese-dominant nation, creating a simply gooey mess that was both delicious and deadly. The victory is not cheesy, however, due to the material that it was made out of emanating immense heat. To ease pain, the Axles dumped Macaroni shell-ters to the citizens. Victory is sharp, however, at 8:1.

United Provinces

The USA opted to provide air support and ground support to the coalition. A blitzkrieg was suggested, however Culldrome suggested going through the less secure parts of UP to incite riots and hopefully governmental collapse. Despite the best efforts by Snoss to quell the invaders and rioters, the government eventually fell and the invaders razed the cities. Simon McLark was missing for around 2 months, until it was revealed that he escaped weeks prior to the invasion. UP's relatively powerful military gave issues, however, which almost caused them to lose due to the heavy defenses set up by them. Victory odds were 5:3.

Margate

Margate immediately began to opting to launch their Zynthonium weapons at the countries involved. Before that could be done, however, the USA launched a deletion missile, fearing the damage it could cause if all countries were attacked. Snoss air support tried to destroy the weapon, but it exploded 2 miles above the country, vaporizing the surrounding areas and causing the then-hiding President, Frederick Mueller, to call for more support for his shambled country. Snoss began to do aerial fighting tactics to destroy as many fighters as possible, but were almost destroyed. They had to retreat before the Axle Powers destroyed their aircraft launchers. Victory odds are 4:3, due to the Snoss support. If the Snoss sent more battalions, this could've been shifted to 3:4.

Final Assault on Snowzerland

With the other countries defeated and sending the remainder of forced either to Snowzerland or their own country for clean up efforts, the USA and Axle Powers begin their full assault on Snowzerland. A majority of forces are directed to the country in a blitzkrieg approach by the ground forced with aerial reconnaissance to watch for carpet bombers. If needed, the military forces will battle for dominance of the sky. The Culldrome and Munijoch military forces create a Space Cruiser compatible PULSE bomb that is able to be shot down in droves, turning the tide of war for the Snoss combined forces. They take the Canton of the Northern Coast with ease and seize the military assets, but not without resistance. Farms are additionally razed and citizens taken prisoner aboard MJ-680's.

Afterward, they press through the mountains and invade Sankt Moritz, capturing the city and establishing a combined powers stronghold where they are stationed at. They blow up the mountain and use the rock for establishing a rock wall to prevent enemy forces from invading.

When they reach the remaining cities, Luzern, Geneva, and Zurich, the powers have two options. They can either assault one of the heavily armed cities at a time, or coordinate a central strike to uproot the entire country. Ed Island proposes something more radical: destroy the entire country using a calculated 10 orbital strikes. Shops Island, not to be beaten, proposes that the powers leave behind the world itself and establish a new base in Notron, Shop's planetary colony. The cost, however, would be immense, as in order to leave no trace, all the forces would need to combine their might toward the center of the South Pole and expand outward by increments of 100 miles until they hit the Outer Regions of Antarctica.

The Axle Powers agreed in secret that only they could be the ones to do this. So, they picked up the citizens to the maximum combined capacity per ships, and began to prepare for a global orbital strike.

In sets of 10, the rods fell, wreaking havoc on the land below, where lava began to spew and fill the air with smoke and black ash. Tsunamis swallowed countries and began to circulate all across the globe. By the time the strikes reached the end of the target, the entire Southern Hemisphere was in ruin, with the magma and shock waves spreading up and out into the Northern Hemisphere.

When the planet was molten and hot, the remaining powers jumped to Notron. Overall, victory is a solid 10:1.

USA, UTR, and Axle Powers vs Archipelago Union and Western Union

In another cataclysmic scenario, the UTR backed the USA and Axle Powers while the rest of the Archipelago Union backed the Western Union and Snowzerland. This time, the USA, UTR, and Axle powers would've still outnumbered the AU + WU alliance by 10,000,000 soldiers, so the alliance would be forced to go on the defensive. The first goal would be to get rid of the countries that lie far away from the bulk of the alliance countries. Then, the USA, UTR, and AP would focus their massive armies on the bulk of the countries.

Caseusopolis

Ed Island used Thermobaric weapons to melt the cheese nation, destroying infrastructure and crippling their cheese related weapons. This attack left Caseusopolis with no choice but to surrender. While the Acadian owned Fort Cheese continued to hold, Ed Island simply dropped a nuclear bomb on the island, completely obliterating it and wiping the island from the surface of the earth. Victory is at an 8:1.

Amataria

Shops Island, along with the USA, deployed tanks and bombers to destroy Amataria's war bots, which they succeeded in doing. The USA also launched many deletion missiles. By then, the sheer strength of the enemy forces forced Amataria to surrender. If not, the USA would deployed 500,000 soldiers to force the country to surrender. The odds of victory are 6:1.

Tropicalis

Before the initial invasion, Shopper planes bombed out much of the islands of Tropicalis, and destroying infrastructure, military bases, and cities, in an effort to lower morale and cripple defenses. Though Tropicalis attempted to deploy all military forces, weapons and defenses, they were overcome by the many soldiers and more cities were brought to ruins and after this, Tropicalis surrendered. If they did not, Shops landed 1,000,000 on the coast of Tropicalis, taking major cities such as Tropicapolis and Lagois City in mere days. Victory is at 7:1.

Margate

Margate, seeing their neighboring allies attacked, launched many of their missiles against the USA. However, the USA's missile defense system prevented most from landing. In retaliation, the USA launched mulitple deletion missiles on Margate's major cities, destroying many cities. The President of Margate then called in Snoss support, which held the advance for a while before they were forced to retreat. The odds are 4:3.

United Provinces

With all the outlying countries destroyed, the Axle Powers, UTR, and USA focused their strength on the United Provinces. The countries supplied the terrorist group Little Penland with funding and weapons, making the group powerful enough to become a big threat. With most of the UP's forces in the south, the countries snuck north and took the northern Snowinian cities. If this plan didn't work, Shopper bombers again bombed many of the major UP cities and military bases, leaving them unable to defend their country. Then the numerically superior UTR forces would engage the broken, tattered remains of the UP military. Though a small force of AU soldiers help defend, the UTR was too powerful. Victory comes at 3:1.

Lys

Once the United Provinces had been conquered, the alliance would swoop in the destroy the last remaining holdout and northernmost country of the Western Union, Lys. It was expected that most of the Western Union forces would retreat there, and therefore the island would be hard to take, since it also had many dragons. The Axle, USA, and UTR first tried bombing them into submission, but after a while, the USA dropped 4 deletion nukes onto the country, completely vaporizing it. The odds of victory are 3:1, though if the AU sent aid, it would be 3:2.

An alternate scenario involved if Lys and their allies fled to the island fortress of Dragonstone. In this attack, many dragons were sacrificed to take down enemy places, though many more managed to damage or destroy the enemy planes. Dragons and Tyroshi fire were also used to incinerate many of the enemy ships. Finally, after many unsuccessful attempts, Ed Island fire a plasma beam from space, completely melting the island. The odds are 3:1.

AU

After the defeating all the Western Union countries, the combined Axle, USA, and UTR alliance advanced on the Ninja Archipelago. Though they suffered heavy losses, they still outnumbered the AU soldiers. One by one, the AU countries each fall to the numerically superior enemies, though they managed to inflict heavy casualties. Space Cruisers also bombard much of AU resistance, causing more countries to surrender. Finally, the Axle Powers nuke the last of the countries, forcing them to surrender. Victory comes at the odds of 8:1.

USA, UTR, and Axle Powers vs. Archipelago Union and Western Union [Alternate]

In an alternate scenario, AU forces opt gather their forces on on the islands of Snowzerland and Lys, each amassing an army of around 10,000,000 before the Axle Powers can prepare. After joined by an additional 1,000,000 soldiers from the United Provinces, the Lysene force splits into two, with 3,000,000 assaulting Culldrome and 8,000,000 assaulting Ed Island, catching them completely off guard. Both countries fall within weeks, though their governments, along with some soldiers, are able to escape. The odds of victory are 6:1 for Culldrome and 4:1 for Ed Island.

Hearing of this, Munijoch begins to airstrike Calada, attempting to get Puffle'and to aid their colony. When no help arrives, the airstrikes are stopped, and Munijoch instead aims to support the USA. In the USA, after the fall of Ed Island, Acadia invades the lightly defended port city of Club Penguin, taking few casualties. Resistance flees to Club Penguin City on King George's Island, hoping to hold out, though AU ships quickly help capture the island too. The odds of victory for Club Penguin is 10:1.

In the Yowien Sea, the Shopper and Culldrom quarters attempt to put up a fight, but are quickly overwhelmed by the Snoss, Castillan, and Puffish, who have superior numbers and are supported by the large AU armies that have headed south. Rockhopper Island also puts up light defenses, and is defeated, though Rockhopper manages to escape with some USA soldiers. Hontana is also quickly overwhelmed. The odds of victory in this front is 10:1.

After the fall of Culldrome and Ed Island, the Culldrome force heads south to join with 1,700,000 Margate soldiers preparing to invade the United States of Antarctica. The around 4,000,000 soldiers wait for the Ed Island and Snoss forces to catch up so they can land simultaneously. Acadia, after capturing Club Penguin, invades Dorkugal with ease. A force of 1,000,000 soldiers is sent further south to reinforce Tropicalis. The odds of Acadia winning to Dorkugal are 10:1, as they have support.

The other groups catch up, and as planned, land simultaneously. AU and WU airstrikes bombed out much of the country, destroying infrastructure, supplies, weapons, and morale. The Snoss group had split up, with one group heading for Frostize and the other for Freezeland. The Frostize group rejoins with the Ed Island group, while the Freezeland group captures Freezeland in days, before heading south, capturing Archet, and much of the Happyface State. The odds of victory are 6:1.

As the three groups advance on the capital, Shops and UnitedTerra have amassed a massive army of 14,000,000. Around 3,000,000 soldiers are sent to invade Tropicalis and Amataria, to prevent them from invading Shops. Even with Margate aid, Tropicalis and Amataria fall in days, due to the Axle Powers' superior numbers and weaponry. The other 11,000,000 are sent north, meeting up with the retreating 4,000,000 USA soldiers in West Pengolia. The odds of victory are 5:1 for Tropicalis and 3:1 for Amataria.

The AU and WU capture South Pole City, though the government is alerted, and is able to escape, establishing a de facto capital in Newton Town. Shopper and UnitedTerrain forces capture many parts of southern Eastshield and eastern Trans-Antarctica and return them to USA hands. With both sides having around equal strength, and the AU-WU alliance holding the north, and the Axle-UT-USA alliance holding the south, both continue to carry out airstrike on each others' position, with Axle members sometimes decimating AU and WU held cities with their superior military technology.